Weigh In Wednesday

Weight: 204
Down 1.6 from last week, 19 overall. That picture of the beer and food prep is my life. I try to be good but inevitably I drink a gallon of beer. Plus we've just had a ton of snacks and eating out. I'm glad to be trying the Blue Apron meals that help with portion sizes. We're going to have to get gangster in June. I did not drink last night but that's probably the first time in weeks.

Lifetime Steps: 2,764,859
That's 94,033 since last week which averages to 13,433 steps a day. We did a lot of walking this weekend. Yard work. I've added some time on to my lunchtime walks. Got my best day on Sunday with 15,974 steps. The hike on Monday had some steep stair steps to climb and I'm still sore today. I've hit or exceeded my steps every day since Sunday May 14. I will likely have to do a rest day today because I have a work meeting at lunch and a work function at dinner. Hooray? I feel like that picture below makes me so happy I'm not 19 pounds heavier.

Frame of Mind
Life is so busy! Early onset PMS seems to be a thing. I had a lot of weird anxiety this weekend. Today and tomorrow I'll be learning a new job. I thought June would be slower but no. Probably not. Lots of fun activities and travel planned. I can't believe tomorrow is June. Like where did May go? I'm really focusing on moving more and eating better again. I am glad my weight gain wasn't worse for how hard I went in May. I'd really like to lose the 14 pounds I need to lose to get to my drivers licence weight.


Long Weekend Pics

 Friday night dance party while Casey You Tubes
 Saturday at the Zoo with the kiddos
 Then to Carpinteria for some park time
 Sissy couldn't hang while we watched Guardians of the Galaxy for the umpteenth time.
 Did some major yard work and planted some veggies
 Sunday pool day wouldn't be complete without Cheetos
 And smoldering
 Got Krispy Kreme for the first time since it opened. YUM
 Casey and I finished Clay Face
 Husband prepared our first Blue Apron meal.
 We killed a ton of beer and I meal prepped. Back on the wagon.
 Jam sesh with Daddy on the drums, Casey on the guitar and Christa on the tea set.
My wackadoodle knucklehead after bath

We also took a lovely hike on Monday and you can see those pictures here.


Haiku Friday

Have your read these books
Ordinary People Change 
The World? Well, you should
They are a bright light
During these very dark times
Just a speck of hope
We must remember
People who made a difference
When times seemed much worse


Weigh In Wednesday

Weight: 205.6
I'm discouraged by this because it means I have gained 2.6 lbs since last week. That puts me at 17.4 lbs total lost which is still awesome but definitely not the 20 I saw last Wednesday! I have no one to blame but myself. I've not been watching what I have been eating on or really limiting my drinking. I will try to do better but the goal is to really get hardcore again starting in June. Memorial Day Weekend does not seem like the logical time to set unrealistic expectations. May was bound to bring this setback with all the celebrating and company and what have you.

Lifetime Steps: 2,670,826
That's 89,428 since last week which averages to 12,775/day. I've hit or exceeded my goal every day since Sunday, May 14. I've added a city block to my work walk which means this week I've hit my goal shortly after lunch. Husband has been very supportive of my weekend walks so I've been taking the dogs while he stays home with the kids. Gives me some time to zone out on a podcast and just not have children on me or asking me for things for an hour. Seems to work out. I really need to work in some sort of additional exercise. There's no getting around it.

Frame of Mind
There has been zero consistency to my schedule lately and I'll admit, it's thrown me for a loop. We had the in-laws here, Vegas, our anniversary and now my mom's friend is visiting. This has meant lots of eating out and lots of money being spent. We don't really do that in real life so I'll be glad in June when there is a return to normalcy. Tonight, Casey starts four weeks of basketball on Wednesdays so maybe that will give me an added boost but I have a work thing already interrupting next week. It's hard because I'm very used to routine and changes frustrate me. Other than that, I feel good and happy overall so it's just a little hiccup to overcome. Can't stop, won't stop.


Eight Years

Eight years with Husband. So many adventures, endless ups and downs. A house, some cars, a couple kids, some pets, some huge losses. This man knows too much about me and I can positively say he has seen me at my very lowest and very worst but has been steadfast through it all. He stumbled upon my blog and knew my secrets and wanted to be with me anyway. It's crazy to me when I sit and think of how easily we could have never happened had he not stumbled upon that movie review and made a rather innocuous comment and had I not decided to reply to it with an email. He was living with someone and I'd been dating someone for years. He lived almost 200 miles away but had actually lived in Oxnard when I was in LA. Considering he's a Michigan man and I'm a California girl, this seems like nothing less than serendipity.
I came so close to messing it all up with him. I was so used to being treated like garbage in my relationships that I was suspicious of how good he was to me. I did that thing where you set someone free and if they come back to you they were yours all along like I was living in some cliche Young Adult novel rather than real life. But I crawled back to him and he embraced me with everything he had and within a month we were engaged. BFF teases me because I am constantly saying how much I love him but he's the best decision I have ever made. I'm so proud to have made him the father of our children and the love of my life.


Weekend Pics

 Husband and I cleaned up nice and went to Suzanne's Cuisine in Ojai.
 Why can't my patch of yard look like this?
 Our 8th consecutive anniversary dinner celebrated here. Perfection.
Those two specks in the distance are deer. 
 I lust after bougainvillea. From Sunday's walk.
 Christa thinks it's good to be queen! 
 Remember how pretty I looked up there? This is what real life looks like.
Poor Betty having to deal with Mabel's codependent ass all the time always.


Haiku Friday

Boy! What a month, huh?
So many celebrations
In-Law visit, too!
They left yesterday
Got my house back in order
Tidy but empty
I'm feeling my age
Recovery took some time
Back to real life now


Book Review

In the middle of February, I had just finished a pretty good streak of reading when my sister-in-law gave me All the Missing Girls by Megan Miranda. I thought I'd dive right into it but here we are, almost two moths to the day later, and I've just finished it. I suppose this book is in the vein of Gone Girl in the sense that is a twist and turn sort of thriller. It starts off with Nic arriving back in her hometown because her father's mental health is declining and he's telling nurses his daughter is in danger. She had left town in a hurry and never really looked back because in high school her best friend had gone missing.
After Nic's arrival, the book begins being told backwards with each new chapter basically starting with the words "The Day Before." I have trouble with books that jump around like this but if you don't, I think you'd probably be able to plow right through this. Nic's childhood sweetheart's new girlfriend goes missing and it's like that high school drama all over again. It's a story of secrets unraveling because in order to understand what is going on with the current missing girl, you have to know what went on back in the day.
It took me until about three quarters of the way in to reading this to really get in to it. The ending was a real pay off for me because all the pieces really fell together nicely with no real loose ends dangling. I liked that it was this clique of people sharing a secret and dramatic past that basically ends up repeating itself. The murder and the mystery and the rumors of a small town felt very realistic. It has inspired me to download The Girl on the Train to my kindle and I'm hoping I can get back on the book a month pace I was on before. Deleting the Facebook app on my phone should really help with that. You turn 40, y'all, and you start making some changes.


Weigh In Wednesday

#fitat40 is the new #fitby40

Weight: 203
Down 1.8 since last week which unbeknownst to me on last Wednesday's weigh-in was a period week. Because of course it was, right? With ALL THE ACTIVITIES planned. I am ecstatic because today I hit 20 pounds lost! I've got 4 pounds to go to be "under 200" which was a #fitby40 goal. Next big goal is to be 190 like my drivers licence claims I am. When I get down to 190, I will have lost the equivalent of what my 3-year old daughter weighs. I have found tackling these small goals makes the big picture not seem so intimidating. My BMI (which whatever) is currently about 30.9 - because I really don't know if I'm 5'7" or 5'8" - so I'm still in the obese category which is anything over 30. Supposedly, to be in the high range of "normal" weight, I should be at 160 so I'm looking at a long journey ahead. Can't stop, won't stop, right?
Lifetime Steps: 2,581.398
That is 52,977 since last Wednesday which averages to 7,568/day. This is not exactly super accurate but honestly I took last week off as far as step counting because it was "Birthday Week" for me and my mother-in-law. We went to the Dodger game and out to lunch on Wednesday and I had a mani pedi and a nap on Thursday. Friday morning I took the fitbit off completely until I got back home from Vegas late Saturday afternoon. So liberating. I'm glad to be back on the horse though. I've hit my step goal every day since despite having a pretty dumb tummy bug that made me almost poop myself on my lunch walk. You're welcome.

Frame of Mind
Despite the massive sleep deficit and maybe days of hangovers, I feel pretty good honestly. Since Wednesday I have had little to no desire for beer which is a first for me. I have had a tummy bug so eating is undesirable. I feel like I have been getting full so much faster and I couldn't even finish my delicious dinner at Yolanda's last night for Taco Tuesday. The margarita I had went straight to my head and I fell asleep putting Casey to bed. Stinkin' lightweight all of a sudden. What's happening to me?!
I had a great week last week with the in-laws here helping out and with all the celebrating of turning 40. This weekend Husband and I have a date for our 8-year wedding anniversary. Yesterday marked a year at my "new" job and I had a great review topped off with a big raise. Starting in June, I will have new and more responsibilities so I'm proud of that. My depression and anxiety have been at an all-time low since I've been moving more and eating better. I'm happy with my body for the first time in a long time. So yeah I think things are good. Here's to a new decade.


Movie Review

It's hard to believe that I saw the first Guardians almost three years ago and it still remains one of my favorites. Our Mother's Day plans to go on a Wildlife Cruise out to the Channel Islands was thwarted by high winds so we ended up taking a big ol' family trip to the movies instead. The in-laws, my mom and us four went to see GOTG2 and I was not disappointed in the least. And from the trailers we saw beforehand, I have a feeling we will be seeing a lot of movies between now and Christmas.
The theme of this sequel, which manages to be as awesome as the first, is "family." We get to meet Peter's dad played by the super handsome Kurt Russell. We also really get to dive deep into Peter's relationship with Yondu who was a pretty bad dude in the first film. I will not lie to you, I totally wept at the end because they hit every family note they could and you know I'm a sentimental mess. Christa was deeply in love with the very lovable Baby Groot who adorably dances through the opening credits. Boy does Rocket make Casey laugh and think he can get away with dropping swear words. I wish that Peter had had more screen time and focus because he is my boyfriend but it wasn't too disappointing. I really liked getting to see more of Drax because he really cracks me up.
Mostly, though, I was so impressed with the background and the visuals. What a spectacular imagination you have to have to dream up a galaxy such as this. The soundtrack slayed again and mom and I sang along more than once. We stayed all the way to the end of the credits for three separate teasers but I'm not sure it would have killed me to have seen them on the DVD. Overall, though, the entire family - young and old - walked out of the theater with smiles on their faces. Highly recommend.


Haiku Weekend Wrap Up

Britney in Vegas
A drunk yet great Dodger game
China Square dinner
Went to the movies
Because wind ruined our plans
Of a day at sea
Way too much eating
Not enough walking, water
Turning 40 rocked


Fit By 40 Weigh In Wednesday Summary

Weight: 204.8
That's down .8 for the week and 18.2 overall. Yesterday I did my "Transformation Tuesday" weigh in and was so excited to see 204.4 but this is fine, too. Reaching the goal of 20 pounds lost by Friday is not going to happen. It's okay. I'm totally at peace with that. This game is not over yet.

Lifetime Steps: 2,528,421
That's 89,694 for the week which averages to 12,813 steps a day. My highest step count was Sunday with 15,634. On Monday, I took a rest day and only got 7,506. I don't regret that rest day. My friend April keeps inviting me to do these Weekend Warrior FitBit challenges and I really find myself aggressively competing. Kind of fun to get that gold.

Frame of Mind
Not going to lie, I'm vibrating this week. It's a wonder I'm getting anything done at work. My in-laws arrived yesterday for a 9-day visit so I have been getting carpets cleaned and windows washed and tidying like crazy so they wouldn't arrive to a pig sty. I took both kids to the doctor yesterday. Dodger game tonight on the 9th anniversary of Husband proposing, pamper day tomorrow, Vegas on Friday and whale watching for Mother's Day on Sunday. Phew! Lots going on.
It was my intention to not walk and not diet this week but I'm just not good at being all the way bad any more. My co-workers and I went to lunch on Monday and I ate half a burrito that was the size of my forearm and didn't walk but still managed to get 7500 steps in. I drank a few beers, had a candy bar, and had zero Effs to give. Yesterday I finished that burrito  for lunch but did walk and did have a few beers. I feel like my body tells me when it has had enough of being good and I listened and I do feel better about things. I'll be back on the ol' wagon with a vengeance on Monday, for sure. With all the celebrating going on, though, I don't want to have to think about that stuff. Just for this week.
I went shopping this weekend with my mom and got regular old, XL shirts. I got some short shorts and some jeans in size 14 which is down 2 sizes since this time last year. I found a foxy dress to wear to Britney and dang it I felt foxy in it. I'm so happy with the progress I have made and I am not upset that I didn't hit a number on a scale because I see how my body has changed. I feel it. And I can't stop, won't stop. This is my lifestyle now: eating better and moving more and drinking less. And I will stick with it because I am actually going to be FIT at FORTY. Not by. Forever now. Because I can't let my kids think it's okay to be sedentary or complacent.


Weekend Pics

 Sister was under the weather. 
First clue was her falling asleep while I ate lunch at the restaurant.
 Texts from Daddy while these guys ran errands and I shopped for clothes.
 Seeming totally fine...
 Then out like a light.
 Tummy bugs are the worst. Everyone but Husband has been cursed.
 On the mend and out for smoothies
 Christa's alter-ego "Lala" which I assume is short for "La Virgen"
Puppy cuddle puddle


Haiku Friday

Cinco de Mayo
One week until I'm 40
It's the final stretch
My thirties were great
Packed with so many events
That were life changing
Excited to see
What the next decade will bring 
Only time will tell


Throwback Thursday

This time last year we were at Disneyland and I want to go to there.

It's also May the 4th so you know what that means...