My Boy's 3rd Halloween


 A year ago today, we lost our beloved Kiyah,
 It would be disingenuous to not acknowledge her here.
This was the last picture I took of her, with our little boy who is no longer so little.


Terrifying Tuesday

Last week I put a picture of a scary spider on facebook to freak everyone out. Well, I think this spider is that other spider's fat uncle or something. Jesus Christ. I got brave and went up and took its picture because there is nothing more awesome than a spider spinning a web of this magnitude, especially when it is covered in the morning dew. The fog is so thick right now I can barely see across the street.

What's awesome about this particular picture is I took it with my phone. After that, it automatically uploaded to my Google + account because I set it up to do that. From there, I uploaded it to this blog via my Picassa album. Amazing. I am so used to plugging in the camera, uploading pictures and doing it the old fashioned way that I feel like this is some amazing new invention. I guess this is what it feels like to be elderly.


Weekend Wrap-Up

On Friday afternoon, Husband went to get me a treadmill from Craigslist. Since I no longer have Curves and the only thing I would use at the gym is a treadmill, we just bought one. Now, I just need to use it. $180 for a gym-grade treadmill that looks like it was mainly used to house dust is a steal if you ask me. That's like 4-months of Curves membership.

On Saturday afternoon we went way, way up in the foothills of Ventura to attend Christine's grandpa's memorial. The view of Oxnard and the Pacific Ocean was beautiful, the mood was light and the bagpiper was piping. Yeah, dude. An actual bagpiper in traditional garb, blowing and roasting under a 90-degree sun. Before all that, though, Casey tried on his costume (not pictured here) and refused to remove the hat. Would you look at those toes? I want to eat them.

On Sunday we carved pumpkins. We got a Sesame Street carving kit at Target for the tools but our tall and skinny pumpkin made a perfect Bert and our round and robust pumpkin made a perfect Ernie so we went with it. That big ass pumpkin had rotten, moldy insides so we said it had cancer. Gross. Then, after all was said and done, we watched the Detroit Tigers get swept by the stupid Giants. Ugh. I will be fair and admit that they had the superior team but it was just too sad to see the Tigers go down like that. 

PS - The pictures I am sure you have seen already on Facebook or Instagram but I'm trying out G+ because Andrea made me feel like I needed to. Ha!


Last Haiku Friday of October

Here comes Halloween
Only a few days away
And I am ready
Casey's costume came
He will be Handy Manny
The blanco version
Casey loves pumpkins
He sees the decorations
Says "Ha'ween, Mama!"


Banana Bread

This bitch is in a baking mood so you get to read about it here! I have made this recipe a bazillion times and think it is super delicious and easy (like your mom) so here goes.

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees.

In one bowl, mix:
2 cups flour
2 tsp baking powder (not to be confused with baking soda)
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp cinnamon (I suppose you could use nutmeg, too, but I haven't nor will I)
I use a whisk to mix that all together thoroughly and it adds a fluff to the flour. This is a technique I use basically every time I bake. Also? Always have your eggs and butter at room temperature. For some reason, the egg thing makes a difference. I thank Christine's mom for those tips.

In your mixer:
2/3 cup butter
1 cup brown sugar packed tightly
Make sure this is nice and creamy then add 2 eggs.
When all that is combined and lovely, add 3 pre-mashed, ripe bananas.
Finally, add your flour mixture and mix until all is married happily.

Now you can put your batter in a regular bread loaf pan or what I have been doing lately is making little breads in a muffin pan. Either way, be liberal with your use of nonstick spray. It is really a godsend.

Bake for 45 minutes. If you stick a toothpick in the middle and see you are pulling out dough, I have found that covering it in tin foil and baking for another 10-15 minutes usually solves that problem. Last night I had to bake it for an extra 25 minutes and I managed not to burn the bread so don't be afraid of putting it back into the oven multiple times for short periods until you pull out a toothpick with zero residue on it.

I happened to double this recipe last night because I had many ripe bananas. I made one plain loaf with half the mixture and with the rest I made those little muffins but added chocolate chips and chopped pecans. Deeee-licious. I highly recommend that combo.


Go Blue

As you all are well aware, my husband is a Michigananian. This means that despite a team being good, if they hail from that glorious state, we must root for them. This includes but is not limited to Detriot Tigers, Detroit Lions and University of Michigan. Apparently the state is divided, though, when it comes to rooting for Michigan State so we almost never do that. You'd be surprised how often Michigan is referred to in popular culture and just how many celebrities hail from there but that is another story for another day.
The World Series is upon us today and the Tigers are playing against the San Francisco Giants. While the Giants were still in the playoffs, my mother - a devoted Dodger fan - told me she was rooting for them because they were the other California team. Unacceptable. There is no bigger Dodger rival than the Giants. A Dodger fan is simply not allowed to do this. Then? On Facebook? Another Dodger fan said the same shit about this series. Are you fucking kidding me?
I have been to the San Francisco stadium ONCE in my life just because I would like to go to all the stadiums before I die. When we were there, we got heckled to death by the Giants fans. And not just good-natured heckling. Cuss words and middle fingers. Yeah. No thanks. I am also not an in-your-face fan. If the Dodgers are in first place or winning a series, I'm happy but not gloating. I can't say the same for the friends of mine on Facebook that root for San Francisco. Thus, I will be rooting for the Detroit Tigers tonight. Holding it down for my man and all his relatives. And secretly flipping off the Giants. Teehee.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: I bleed blue.


X-Men First Class

Want to know the very first thing that entered my mind while watching this? Ok here goes: "Kevin Bacon?" Yeah, dude. Kevin Bacon is the big ol' baddy in X-Men First Class. Nothing could have been more random but it really paid out in the end. I'll just say right now, I really liked this movie. Husband and I have decided we simply love an origin story no matter how many times or how many ways it is done. It took a minute to get over the new cast of mutants but we did get a couple nice cameos from Hugh Jackman and Rebecca Romjin to put us at ease that they gave their blessing.
So basically, the movie just tells us how the mutants got together and how Charles Xavier and Magneto ended up going their separate ways. And we get Nazis. Nothing like putting some very heavy shit in an otherwise fairly light movie. We watched this on Saturday after watching Avengers on Friday so I think we were just in the mood for some good old fashioned comic book cheese. I will say this, women, there is some delicious eye candy to be had in this movie. Yummy Michael Fassbender. I am a fan. Sure, the action is good, the story didn't suck and the chicks are hot, too... but Michael Fassbender? Mmmhmmm.


Weekend Pics Pumpkin Patch Edition

 I just thought this duck was very fashionable with his pompadour.

 This is McGrath Ranch, built in like 1908. We have always bought our pumpkins here but this was our first tractor ride that showed us the grounds. Way cool.

 These are my cowboy boots which are apparently very in fashion right now but mine are dirty from fairs and pumpkin patches so they will never be cute.

 Casey rockin' a faux-hawk on his very first tractor ride. 
That fella behind him is his uncle, my brother.

 Here are all the rotten cousins together. Damn they are cute.


Emo Haiku Friday

Half the month is gone
And the weather is changing
Leaves are turning red
Pumpkin patch planning
And then thoughts of Thanksgiving
Christmas and New Years
Time goes by so fast
Barely have a grasp on "now"
And tomorrow's here


Good Bad and Ugly - Now with pictures!

The Good
  • Although I am counting my chickens before they hatch a bit, I have a good feeling our budget will be looking MUCH better come December.
  • We don't have a single plan this weekend aside from going to the pumpkin patch. We've had three birthdays to celebrate in four weeks' time so I think I'm good on plans for a bit.
  • All of Husband's hard work and precious time put into Ethan's dinosaur hunter kit for his 6th birthday was a success.

The Bad
  • Despite my shame spiral, I have continued to beer it up this week. I don't see that stopping until one of those pee tests says "Hey, ho, you're pregnant. Cut it out."
  • This weather is totally gross. I want autumn to be a time for sweaters and the like but instead it's all east winds and heat waves.
  • We had to cancel going away for Thanksgiving because our budget just isn't there yet. Damn being responsible.
The Ugly
  • I noticed that lately I have been going number two a whole heck of a lot and my tummy was not feeling so good. Cut to last night and reading that the prenatal vitamins I have been taking have a stool softener in them. Hahaha
  • I gained back all the weight I had lost for my birthday and can't seem to get off my fat, lazy ass and get back to exercising. My walking shoes are right here next to my desk in the office so I can walk on my lunch hour but it's hot as hell, yo. No thanks!
  • This big ass spider outside my office window:


Personal Journey

I went on the crazy train again today when it comes to pee sticks and here is why. Short story is I have had two hangovers in two weekends. What that means is that I have had a little bit too much to drink two weekends in a row. Normally, I don't worry too much about how much I drink but for some reason this month has really hit me hard. I'm not even close to having my period, forget about missing it but I still bought pregnancy tests on the way to the register while buying diapers this morning.
These tests, as opposed to the others, were digital. I wasted both of those. I guess you have to wait til the clock thingy is on the screen before you pee whereas the good old fashioned ones you just pee on. I would have known that if I had read the directions but, well, haste makes waste. So rather than take that as a sign that I need to seriously get a hold of myself, I went to Walgreen's on my lunch hour to buy a new box of the old school ones and a bag of Ruffles to quell my shame. That's how I do.
Of course, the tests were all negative and I know that. I just needed something to calm my nerves and to tell me that the only person I am hurting with my binge drinking is myself. Right? Here I am trying to potentially incubate another human being only to poison it with alcohol. Real smooth, Randi.
So these are my confessions, folks. I think I'd be better off finding out I am barren.


Southern Apple Crumble Recipe

'Tis the season for Apple Crumbles so I made this Betty Crocker recipe:

3 large apples peeled and coarsely chopped (I used 4)
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 tsp of cinnamon (or 2 if you like but I used 1/2 tsp of nutmeg for a kick instead)
1/4 cup of cold butter chopped into pieces

1 pouch of Betty Crocker Oatmeal Cookie Mix
1/2 cup melted butter
1/2 cup chopped pecans

Mix the filling together in a bowl and put in an 8x8 glass cooking dish.
Mix the topping ingredients together (minus the pecans) in the same bowl. Then once it's crumbly put that right on top of the other stuff in the dish.

Bake at 300 degrees for 40 minutes, add the pecans, and then put it in for another 15-20.
We topped with Breyer's Natural Vanilla ice cream and it was TITS. TITS, I say!


Ladies Night Haiku Friday

BFF and I
Will paint the town red tonight
Culver City, y'all
Some drinks and dinner
The men caring for the kids
Should be amazing
Take Vehicular
For a ride down the coastline
I'm flying solo


Surrounded By Idiots

Last Friday we had to buy a new refrigerator because the one I inherited when I took over Gran's place was about 20 years old and starting to do weird drippy things. We found a nice big one for under $900 at Lowe's so we got the line of credit with 18 months same as cash and ordered it - specifically asking for the free ice-maker option. I got charged for the ice-maker supply line so I assumed all was well and good. We requested Friday delivery. I got a call late Saturday night telling me the fridge was back-ordered and they could deliver Friday at the soonest, but that's what we requested... "Just wanted to make sure you didn't think we forgot about you (more rambling message) all right then... I suppose I should give you a phone number hardeeeharhar." Someone at Lowe's was clearly aiming to be a used car salesman. I get a call on Tuesday that my fridge is in and they'll deliver Wednesday. Fine, sooner is better. Wednesday, they show up and all is well and good but they don't have the ice maker. I call to fix it and the guy tells me "One was never ordered." And I said to him that was the problem and got hung up on. Why the hell would I order an ice-maker supply line and not the ice maker!? Luckily, management at Lowe's is smarter than its employees and someone is coming out on Friday to fix all the wrong.

Then, last Saturday we had a fun little shindig for Husband's birthday and because I don't cook, I decided to have bar food catered by BJ's. I placed the order on Thursday and was told I would be called on Saturday morning for my credit card number. At noon on Saturday, I called BJ's since they didn't call me and gave them my credit card number and told them I would see them at 3. At 3, there was no food at my house so I called them. They said the food was in the oven.When I asked why it was late since I ordered on Thursday and called again that very morning to confirm, I was told "I'm not going to make up a story, we dropped the ball but I'll give you a discount." 45 minutes later my food arrived and all was well in the world with a discount of about 17% of the bill. I tipped the driver a crisp $20. It is now 6 days later and I still haven't seen a charge go through on my credit card. Does this mean my meal was free? Was it easier to write me off than to explain why my shit was discounted?

Hm.... Well, at least I blogged.


Movie Review Monday

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, we actually managed to watch a movie this weekend. Look at us! I picked Wanderlust because I am smitten with Jennifer Aniston and this is the movie where she met her fiance Justin Theroux. And I just can't say no to a movie that stars Paul Rudd. From what I recall, when this movie was in the theater, it received kind of a lukewarm response. Personally, I liked it. I laughed and it was fun to watch  and see how many cameos from random comedians and actors they could sneak in (Hey there, Ray Liotta!). Husband commented it was like a random sequel to Wet Hot American Summer which makes sense because it was pretty much written by the same people and starred some of the same cast. I also feel that Judd Apatow can't go wrong and he touched this movie so I give it my blessing. By the way? If you haven't seen Wet Hot American Summer I really think you should just because it's such a weird cult hit.
So the movie itself: basically Paul Rudd and Jennifer Aniston are New Yorkers that lose their jobs and their tiny studio apartment/micro-loft  and are forced to move to Atlanta to live with family until they can get back on their feet. On their way to Atlanta, they get lost and stumble upon this commune and fall in love with it until the reality of the commune kind of hits Paul Rudd in the face. Aniston plays a good flake who seems to bounce from passion to passion so she gets sucked into the cult and Threroux's leader character. Hilarity ensues thanks to nudity and drug use. I think for a Sunday hangover day, this was a great choice for me. I think I'd probably watch it again just to watch Paul Rudd amp himself up in the mirror by talking about what he was going to do with his dick to the lady in the commune. Yup.


Happy Birthday Husband Haiku Friday

Another year gone
He sure doesn't look that old
Look at that sweet face
I'm one lucky gal
To have a husband like him
My pal, Dr. Brad
Going on a date
Dinner out to celebrate
Turning thirty-eight


Good, Bad, Ugly

The Good
  • I like that there are all new shows on TV even if it does cut into my Netflix time.
  • Fall has arrived and it is wonderful and good. I like the season for its holidays and weather. 
  • My period made an appearance this morning so the waiting is over.
The Bad
  • I miss going to the movies with my Husband. Football season, man. I blame it.
  • Now that my period is here I have to assume I'm not pregnant which is fine but I guess a bit disappointing.
  • I thought yesterday was Thursday so this week is longer than I want it to be.
The Ugly
  • I jammed a frame into the wall rather than make it through the doorway and the corner of it punctured a spot to the lower left of my vagine. Or right if you're looking at me. Either way, that bruise is NASTY.
  • Seeing 220 on the scale whether I am clothed or not.
  •  Mitt Romney's stupid face and his followers. Hehe. That's not nice.


Period Watch 2012

Well, blog readers, it seems as thought BFF was right: I did end up taking that test last night and got another big, fat NO. It seems I can't have those laying around the house without wanting to pee all over them so I shan't buy another until my period is actually non-existent. Speaking of periods, today there seems to be cramping and the slightest hint of what I assume is Aunt Flo arriving. I guess my birth control removal calculations were wrong and my body is like a damn clock and really likes Wednesdays to get the ol' ball rolling. Looks like two weeks from today I'll start humping Husband like it's my job and we'll see if we can't conceive. Until then.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: I clearly have a problem and you know way too much about my reproductive system.


Tummy Tuesday

So here's a fun little game I have been playing: how many times can I pee on a stick in a week? I have literally taken like 5 pregnancy tests in the last two weeks. Here's why: on the box it says it can detect a pregnancy 5 days before a missed period. Since I had the sex on two of my fertile days (the 13th and 15th of September) I figured that I should probably know a couple weeks after. Because I am a crazy person. All of those pregnancy tests were negative and one, a digital, even typed out the word NO just like that. Not to be confused with "no" or "No." That NO is a big, fat negative.
Now comes the interesting part. I should be starting my period, like, now. But I'm not. Menses is nowhere to be found. I sort of abruptly stopped my birth control in August on a Thursday rather than waiting for the designated Sunday to take the ring out. If I was doing the ring schedule, it would be out on Sunday, bleeding by Wednesday. So by my calculations, out on Thursday, bleeding by Sunday? Maybe Monday? Either way, welcome to my vagina and the lack of blood therein.
Because I am trying to take the advice of the lovely Andrea, I am going to calm the fuck down. And because BFF doesn't think I can wait until Friday to take the last pregnancy test, I'm going to prove her wrong. Probably. Why Friday you ask? Well, that's Husband's birthday. Why not see if I can give him an unexpected present. Plus, if it says NO again, I'm drinking a bottle of wine on our dinner date night. WEE!
And just for the record, weigh in today was 219.5/220 with shoes, socks, undergarments, jeans and a tee on. Still not great but not as bad as I thought it was. I also was able to fit in some new size 16 Misses jeans which I don't consider "regular" but they must be.