Arbor Day Haiku Friday

April is over
What a busy month it was
Lots of company
My uncle's coming
To visit the elderly
Help clear out their house
May brings many things
Anniversary, birthday
Mother's Day, Shower


Burnin' Down The House

Recently, our dryer stopped getting hot. It still turned on and tumbled; there simply was no heat. I found that odd but luckily we have a laundromat on the corner so I just dragged that last load over there to dry. I always try to be Mrs. Fix-it so I removed the back hose and made sure there was no lint blockage. I even vacuumed out the lint trap to make extra sure there was no problem there. Still, no heat.
We have a warranty on our dryer and since it isn't even two years old yet, I called and had the repairman come out to take a look. He said there was nothing wrong with the dryer, the electrical outlet simply wasn't putting out enough voltage. Interesting. One would think that it would be all or none when it comes to electricity. Unfortunately, we had to involve the rental agency and have them get an electrician out to survey the problem.
Luckily, they sent an electrician out that same day. Charles poked and prodded a couple outlets but couldn't identify the problem. When he opened the door to the electricity panel, he sort of chuffed and said "Here's the problem!" I'd say! See those breakers? Burnt, I tell you! Naturally, I freaked out. From appearances, that shit looks like it was on fire. I have a baby and a dog and don't want my apartment burning down thankyouverymuch. He said he had advised that they replace this stuff long ago because it was old but clearly that wasn't on the priority list. Guess what he's doing today?
My favorite part of this process was the rental agency trying to assure me that this wasn't a big deal. That there was never any risk to me or my family. And when I did express concern, that condescending bitch on the other end of the telephone line would hear none of it. Then, she had the other guy call me to tell me the same shit she already did. I told him "Apparently I am not allowed to be concerned about any of this so I'm not sure why you are calling me." I'm very ready to move into my house so I no longer have to go through a third party when I need repairs done. I just get to have the headache all by myself instead of having it compounded by assholes. Husband thinks they were just extra "in my business" because they're scared of me after all my letter writing. Whatever.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: Why rent when you can own?


Casey Tuesday

Casey is 35 weeks old today and it's the 1st week of his 8th month. He turned 8 months old on Easter Sunday so we took his JC Penney's portraits with bunny ears on. Those pictures are deadly. You have been warned. This morning I felt the beginnings of his first tooth. It is just a tiny, sharp point on his front, lower, center gum line. He doesn't mind if I rub my finger on it but if I try to pull his lip back and move his tongue to actually try to see it he sort of loses his shit. I figured something was bound to happen soon because his tongue has been constantly flickering in and out of his mouth like a tiny lizard. My little boy is growing up.



I just read this on a website called Learn From My Fail:
"Sorbitol in high doses gives little kids diarrhea. You might want to be aware of this before you let your kid eat a whole bunch of breath mints sweetened with sorbitol…"

I have had diarrhea for a couple weeks now. I eat Ice Breakers like they are crack and I am an addict. #1 ingredient? Sorbitol.

I will be completely honest with you here. I have really let my eating habits fall complely by the wayside. When I was pregnant, I got hooked on those damn breath mints but lately I've been popping two every ten minutes. I've been drinking beer, soda and coffee almost exclusively. I drink about 32 ounces of water a day during the week but come the weekend I pretty much only use water to bathe or wash clothes and dishes. Fast food? Guilty. Candy by the handfuls in the office? You betcha. It's not like I have a ton of time to exercise so I may as well diet. Good Lord. I've purged the house of junk food and now it's time to get serious. I cannot be the fat Matron of Honor. The name already sounds fat; I don't want to look the part.


Haiku Good Friday

I failed Lent, you guys
I totally ate candy
April was a bust
Also a bust though?
My big thighs through my pant seams
Nutrition? What's that?
Stress makes me pig out
Fatty fatty two by four
Cadbury Creme Eggs*

*The lion is the best thing that ever happened to me in my life as far as Easter is concerned.



The Good
  • My parents coming home Sunday
  • Crusty being here
  • Casey doing quite well with the crib training
The Bad
  • Being the family's organizer/elderly shuttle
  • Our broken dryer
  • May looking to be much busier than April
The Ugly
  • Kiyah's bloody cyst that she won't leave alone
  • The trail of blood in my apartment thanks to said cyst
  • The coating of age/dust on everything in the "new" house


On The Move

This past Saturday, I spent three hours packing up the remainder of the things my Gran wanted to move into her new apartment. On Sunday, after 7 hours of hard labor, we got her all moved in and mostly unpacked with only one casualty: a paper tapestry she hangs on the wall. It looked fixable. But if not? It was a hundred years old anyway. She told me yesterday that she is completely done unpacking and she had a bunch of stuff that she wasn't going to keep so it's all going back to the house this weekend. Monday and Tuesday during my lunch hour, I have gone to the empty house and tried to clean up the devastation that remains. I plan to do this for the remainder of the week.
It's funny, I always thought my Gran was super tidy. Her house always seemed to be the epitome of clean. Turns out, she was thisclose to needing a Hoarders intervention. Not only did she have a surplus of food in the garage (mostly expired), but she has probably not gotten rid of any tsotchke or accoutrement since the 1960s. Everything in her house is valuable according to her. She paid $100 for two lamps forty years ago and she swears they are antiques. God bless her. My grandparents managed to completely fill the garage and every room of their 4-bedroom, 2-bath home with shit and most of it is being sold or tossed in the trash.
Now that I am taking things off of shelves and out of drawers and cupboards, I am realizing what a mess we have to clean up before we move in. I don't think my grandparents were really "maintenance" people so we have to paint and do some deep cleaning and put in new carpet before we take up residence. The sunroom addition is totally not up to code and infested with termites so that has to go. The popcorn on the ceiling needs to be scraped off. The gaudy wallpaper needs to be taken off the walls. I'm looking forward to making this house my home but I have a feeling a lot of elbow grease will be needed.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: Busy hands are happy hands.


Casey Tuesday

Casey is 34 weeks old today. It is the last week of his 7th month. He pooped 4 times yesterday. He also got to meet Crusty for the first time. He's doing a trick (click for video) now where every time he takes a bite of his food he does what my nephew used to do and I called that the vampire monkey face. He scrunches up his face and inhales and exhales out of his nose. It's sort of hilarious and he does it all the time. He also does a lot of mean mugging and sort of looks like Popeye because he squints his eyes in a silly way. Casey is also becoming quite the mama's boy. He isn't a big fan of being held by other people when I am in the room. If he's left alone in his crib he grabs the railings and can pull himself up to his knees; time to drop the bottom down I guess. We have hundreds of dollars worth of toys lying around but he loves an empty box or a plastic jar full of pennies (or really anything he can bang and make noise with). He's really having fun with new sounds and blowing. It's neat when you figure out all the things you can do with your mouth. That's what she said?


Haiku Friday on a Monday

Called in sick last week
Spent no time online Friday
Had anxiety.
Folks gone for 2 weeks
I am acting as the glue
Straight holding it down
We moved my Granules
"OUR HOUSE" is almost vacant
Getting it handled



The Good
It's pay day. There's a very good chance Husband will be home tonight instead of tomorrow night. Our taxes were done a long time ago so I'm not going nuts with a deadline. I didn't have heartburn last night.

The Bad
Casey didn't nap yesterday like he usually does after I pick him up from Maria's. Defiant little man. I take for granted that time when he naps and I get to eat dinner or just have 30-45 minutes of quiet me time. Having it taken away is sort of rotten.

The Ugly
Last night's portion of the crib training process. I was awoken at least 4 times in a 4 hour period and then awake from 3-4 a.m. It's awesome waking up at 3 a.m. to change a poopy diaper. Awesome I say. However, getting up and having him greet me with the hugest smile ever - no matter the hour - makes it a little easier.


Busy Bee

I'm busier than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest. My parents are out of the country so not only am I a single-mom for the next two weeks (save for the weekends), I also get to take care of any and all things grandparent related in their absence. Would you like to see my agenda?

Tonight - Work. Pick up Casey. Pick up Gran. Go visit Grandpa at the home.
Thursday - Work. Dentist. Supermarket.
Friday - Work. Shuttle Gran. Pick up Casey. Take them both to the home.
Saturday - Pack Gran to move her to her new apartment.
Sunday - Move and unpack Gran. Take her to the supermarket. Take her to the home.
Monday - Work. Crusty arrives! Dinner with her family.
Tuesday-Thursday - Work. Hopefully QT with Crusty. Sibling taking over elderly?
Friday - Work. Husband shuttles Gran. Pick up Casey. Go to the home. Andrea staying the night after the Prince concert.
Saturday - Penney's for portraits @ 9 a.m. Ethan's game? Andrea's bailing early so there went that visit!
Easter Sunday - Taking Gran with us to Crusty's for dinner. Try and squeeze in a visit with Grandpa at the home, too.

Then after that, we get to get the house ready to move and my uncle is coming from Germany for a visit. Then we get to pack and move, too! Holy cow, right? Super busy! On top of that, Husband and I are in talks about his job which sort of doesn't sound 100% stable right now and the cost of his commute. These conversations are super stressful and giving me acid reflux and IBS. We calculated that over the past three years we have spent close to $16,000 on gas. Crazy right? I never thought of it that way before. It was always just $500 a month. Wowzas. I'm trying hard to remain focused and positive and strong but I have to admit, I'd love for things to just fall into place already. However, I am grateful we are employed and healthy. Things could definitely be a lot worse.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: If you don't get everything you want, think of the things you don't get that you don't want. ~ Oscar Wilde


Casey Tuesday

Casey is 33 weeks old today. It's the third week of his seventh month. He's enjoying bananas, watermelon and cantaloupe along with his pureed veggies and baby cereal now. We also feed him a little bit of what we are eating to keep him from staring at us all through our meal like a starving dog. His newest trick (click for video) is holding on to my outstretched legs and walking back and forth. He's definitely getting the idea that when he holds his arms out when he wants to be picked up, I will most likely do it. He rolls over and over and over but will not crawl regardless of how much Husband and I entice him with baby talk, toys and overall enthusiasm.
Because he is getting big and mobile, co-sleeping is no longer working out for us. Husband has been rolling over on Casey's arm and pinning him and there just isn't enough room for the three of us in a California King. I'm sorry, what? Anyway, last night I started crib training and it went pretty well. I put him in the crib while he was still awake and talked with Husband on the phone while I laid in the bed next to Casey's crib. That way, he knew I was there so it made it easier for him to fall asleep on his own without any singing or snuggling. He woke up twice at different times of the night, sort of whimpering, so I just said it was ok and he went back to sleep on his own. I didn't get up to soothe him. Then at 4 a.m. he dropped his chupie through the slits of the crib onto the floor so I just put him in bed with me until he woke me up for good at 6. Not too shabby. I'm going to keep doing this until Friday and then move back into my own room and Casey will have his own room. We'll see how it goes.


Movie Review Monday

This weekend we watched The Fighter. I went into this movie thinking it would be all about boxing but it really has more to do with family. Mark Wahlberg is Micky who is trained by his older brother, Dicky. Dicky knocked down Sugar Ray Leonard in his heyday and was the pride of his town until he turned into a crack addict. Micky is also managed by his mother, Alice, who is a big-haired, chain-smoking, Bongo-wearing mess. The 90s fashion in this movie will make you hang your head in shame if you ever wore a body suit or a white denim mini. Amy Adams, currently my most favorite actress ever, plays Micky's girlfriend and she is as tough as nails yet a classy broad. And you should see Micky's seven sisters - WOWZA. All in all, I really liked this movie a lot. It was dark and gritty yet I laughed quite a bit because it maintained a sense of humor. There is no denying Christian Bale deserved the supporting actor award; he is so incredibly immersed in his character you forget he is a Brit (or Batman for that matter). And as loathe as I am to admit it, I think Marky Mark can officially put his Funky Bunch days behind him and be proud of his reinvention as a pretty great actor who makes pretty great choices in movie roles.


Haiku Friday

The in-laws are gone
Our government may shut down
Hubs may lose his pay
I woke up at 3
To manually remove
Poop from my son's butt
I swear to Jesus
If things don't shape up real soon
I will hang myself



The Good
Car repairs are behind me and Vehicular has new shoes; both seem to make her run smoother. We had a nice, week-long visit with the in-laws that ends today. Tomorrow is the end of this week of horrors. The ball to get my 401k rolled over and my loan processed is rolling. My folks leave for a 2-week vacation on Saturday.

The Bad
If congress can't decide on this budget, Husband (who is employed by the gubment) can't go back to work and won't get paid. The price of gas doesn't seem to be getting any lower and he's got one helluva commute. Both of these things sort of equal poverty for us. Also, with my folks gone I get the added fun of being responsible for moving Gran into her new digs and essentially for Gran in general.

The Ugly
The bruise on Casey's cheek that looks like a tear-stain and is a constant reminder that I dropped him. Ugh. I know it's the first of many boo-boos but I keep replaying that sound and those tears and it's killing me softly.


What A Week!

So... wow! Lots of money being spent on my nearly 8-year old Vehicular right now. Between the repairs and new tires I think total we've surpassed $2,000. I should have probably just traded her in and started with a new car but I didn't. Oh well. Maybe she'll last another 16 years and she can be Casey's first car, all vintage and whatnot.
I've been sort of stressing about money lately. Between the car and moving and repairs that need to be done on our apartment and renovations that will need to be done on the new place before we move in, I'm a bit overwhelmed. We went shopping for carpet for the first time in my life and that was crazy. I definitely am not used to needing to buy things that cost thousands of dollars. It's sort of new to me. Now I have to do things like get measurements and estimates and order in a timely manner and whatnot.
I'm also taking a loan out of my 401K and trying to transfer my old retirement fund into my current one so that has meant lots of forms and phone calls and time. It sort of feels like I'm robbing Peter to pay Paul. I've borrowed a bit here, charged a bit there and am hoping it all sort of comes out in the wash by the end of the year.
We've had the in-laws staying with us in our 2-bedroom apartment since Friday night of last week and it's getting a little cramped now. They're delightfully wonderful people and I love them but 5 of us in a small spot starts to get a little too cozy come the end of a week-long visit. To top that off, Casey fell off the bed this morning. Our bed is pretty high. It had to have been a good 3 foot fall. There is nothing more heartbreaking than hearing your child thud to the ground. I think he may have hit his cheek and there's a wee bruise there now. Hopefully it doesn't turn into a shiner. It's bad enough I was the one on watch when the boy fell but to have his grandparents in the next room to hear it all go down is no less than shameful.
Thank God it's the hump day and we're halfway through this week because mama can't take no more.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: When it rains, it pours.


Casey Tuesday

Casey is 32-weeks old today. It's the second week of his 7th month. His grandparents are here this week visiting from Michigan so he has been getting a lot of attention. He is also acting decidedly more independent. His mind knows what it wants to do, he just can't get his body to follow through with his desires. He is so interested in eating whatever it is I have in my hand that it is almost to the point of begging. I'm using the word "no" a lot more. There's a lot more crying when things don't go his way. Diaper changes are apparently the worst thing that ever happened to him. I say this on every single Casey Tuesday but those damn teeth are there they just won't poke through already! I know they hurt him because he cries in his sleep and he hangs on his jaws and is just miserable in the evenings. We've been using the frozen teething ring, tried a frozen wash cloth, have used teething tablets a couple times. I don't know. I just hope something happens soon. However, Husband and I are very reluctant to give up that toothless mouth of his. It's so perfectly drooly and kissable. I believe he is going to see the Easter bunny today and I can hardly wait to see how those pictures come out. Hopefully he won't spit up on himself right before his visit then proceed to make a horrible face like he did with the most perfect Santa ever to be at a mall. Casey's. Worst. Picture. Ever.


Case of the Mondays

  • My in-laws arrived Friday and it's been loads of fun but MIL passed out on Saturday morning and I thought she died so that was super scary. All the attention they are lavishing on Casey is sort of turning him into a spoiled monster but I'm not mad. That's what grandparents do.
  • My car is costing me an arm and a leg. Not only that but I found out that although Vehicular was at the shop all day on Friday, they are keeping it all day today and part of tomorrow. Awesome.
  • I'm officially debt free save for my student loan and a mortgage but need to take a loan from my 401K to pay for the car and the stuff we need to do to our apartment before we move out and the house before we move in. How does that work? Mo' money, mo' problems indeed.
  • I didn't get to watch any movies this weekend but we did get to go up to the Santa Ynez area for a wee road trip. We said hi to the tiny ponies, went wine tasting and finished up with beer tasting. Not too shabby for a Sunday.


April Fool's Haiku Friday

Had a wee virus
On my computer at work
Kept me from blogging
Played the hell out of
Some FreeCell and Solitaire
Taking it old school
Want a quick recap?
Britney Spears, Opening Day
Stories with morals