Movie Review Haiku Friday

Half-naked natives
Shifty-eyed, so-called actresses
Werewolves and vampires
Lots of teenage angst
And Bella biting her lip
Makes me miss high school
It's my secret shame
Reading the books, these movies
I can't look away


Tummy Thursday

One thing I really like about all this baby business is the cute stuff my friends keep buying me (er, I mean, the baby)! Last week I got a wee Paul Frank "Julius" butt-wipe holder from BFF & Babe and then this arrived, also from them! I can't stand it! All the tiny clothes and shoes and socks... I'm dying. I think I'm going to need the scanner gun to register at Target but that list is sitting pretty nice right now too. I hear my shower is in July.
I am really starting to feel the little fella moving around quite a bit now. I always ask Husband where the baby thinks he's going. Do you think he feels like an astronaut in the zero gravity of outer space? Is he running laps in there? Hehe. I love it, feeling proof that there is a living being inside me even if it still sort of feels like indigestion. Maybe a fart? I can't explain it. It's like an internal thump but it's super cute.
We had our last doctor appointment on Thursday and everything sounds good heartbeat wise. I was a little shocked when the good doctor whipped out the measuring tape and put it over my belly. It felt like he was measuring to lay carpet. Measure twice, cut once! I go for my glucose test to make sure I don't have the diabeetus this coming Friday morning. Our ultrasound place had originally scheduled us for another ultrasound on Friday but our primary OBGYN said it was excessive. I agree. So guess what... we're not going.

Here's what babycenter.com says about 23 weeks:
Turn on the radio and sway to the music. With his sense of movement well developed by now, your baby can feel you dance. And now that he's more than 11 inches long and weighs just over a pound (a large mango), you may be able to see him squirm underneath your clothes (Nope. Not yet!). Blood vessels in his lungs are developing to prepare for breathing, and the sounds that your baby's increasingly keen ears pick up are preparing him for entry into the outside world. Loud noises that become familiar now — such as your dog barking or the roar of the vacuum cleaner (Or how many time his mother cusses someone out in a day...) — probably won't faze him when he hears them outside the womb.


So Close To Over

Last night I finished a PowerPoint presentation for today. I hate procrastinating. I do. But I do it all the time. Either way, it got done, just totally last minute. Now today I have to do the actual 7-minute presentation and although I know the material, I feel horribly unprepared. I am sure it will be fine but I hate getting in front of a group of students and a professor and speaking a language that is not my native tongue. I love to read in Spanish, listen in Spanish... I just hate speaking it.
And I have to do it all again on Friday. Only it won't be in front of my class. It will be in front of a panel of professors and a bunch of other graduating seniors and whatever guests they decide to bring. And although it's only 4 minutes and I get the assistance of another PowerPoint to guide me, I still feel horribly unprepared and terrified I am going to poop myself in front of everyone. I'm totally not bringing a guest.
As for my final project, I have a 15-page play written but was told it isn't "long enough." Not sure what happened to quality over quantity but whatever. I doubt it's even "quality." I have to add a couple more scenes so that's another 5-6 pages. That brings us to 20. In addition to that, I have to write a 10-page analysis of my process and what I learned and all that jazz. All due on May 7th. I can honestly say I have never been more tired of looking at a computer monitor.
Then on May 10th is my final exam. And I'm done. Forever. I cannot believe it. I really doubt I will ever speak Spanish again after this even though it is my major. I just can't bear it.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: Being a student is not my bag and I'm glad it's over in less than 2 weeks.


TMI Tuesday - Celeb Edition

Who is one celebrity you would like to:

Cuddle? Kevin James
Elope with? Mike Rowe
Love? John Krasinski as "Jim" from The Office
Excite beyond words? Britney Spears. Is that wrong?
Bang? Don Draper (the character on Mad Men/actor, Jon Hamm)
See in bed with their current fling? Agent Seeley Booth (David Boreanaz) & Dr. Temperance Brennan (Emily Deschanel) but they must be in character and on TV. I don't want the porno version. Just the made for TV stuff.

Bonus (optional):Tell us about one encounter (if any) that you've had with a celebrity.
I have had many an encounter with celebrities. I once sold Jimmy Kimmel a chair at Staples. Also helped the guy who played John Silva on The Young & The Restless there and met Rick James' widow. The Home Depot where I worked in the San Fernando Valley was a hot spot for celebs: Joey from Blossom, "I can't believe it's not butter" Fabio, Holly Marie Combs from Charmed, the guys who played Ryan and Neil on The Young & The Restless. Sat behind Alyssa Milano at a Kings game. I tell you, I rub elbows with Hollywood elite. I'm surprised you didn't know that.

Questions are from here.


What a Week Haiku Friday

Crusty got engaged
And she called me a matron
So I shot her dead
Heard baby's heartbeat
And Husband got to be there
Such a groovy sound
Now it's homework time
Only a week to finish
Right down to the wire


The Girls of Janetwood

I grew up on a street in Oxnard called Janetwood. In my opinion, it was the best place I could have grown up. There were four other girls in the 'hood very close to my age: Crusty, Denise, Danielle and HLP. There was always someone to play with and we all went to school together at one point or another and though we didn't always get along with one another, we were always friends. Birthday parties, throwing the ball around in the street, sleepovers, swimming in Crusty's pool... it was a magical time. And though in high school and after graduation, we all sort of drifted apart and went our separate ways, we ended up right back to being friends again later in life. Thank goodness.
Denise got married. Then me. Then HLP. Then Danielle. And now Crusty is engaged.
Danielle and I are both pregnant right now.
It's mind blowing that we're all grown ups scattered across the United States yet tethered together somehow in another little neighborhood called facebook. I'm still a stone's throw from Janetwood, Crusty's in Philadelphia, Danielle's in San Francisco, Denise is in Portland and HLP is in Arizona. But regardless of the distance, I still feel super close to all of them and am so glad that we're all in touch.
So here's to my old 'hood and the ladies that lived there. Janetwood. Up to no good. Holler.



We haven't quite mastered this weekend away thing yet. We got off to a pretty late start on Saturday morning and ended up taking the longer and more time consuming Highway 1 route instead of taking the quick and easy 101 Freeway a little further north and virtually ending up at the same place. So our trip to Madonna Inn was mostly just a stop to pee and take a picture inside their uniquely tacky restaurant:
Glasses @ The Madonna Inn
We got to the Creekside Inn at around 2:30 pm and decided to rest for a bit. Can I just say this spot was lovely? The bed was a little uncomfy but the breakfast was quite tasty. Can't go wrong with local pastries. On the hillside outside our wee balcony? Cows. Below them? A creek. In the trees? Some loud ass frogs that I got to listen to all night as the cool breeze wafted in through the screen door.
Creekside Inn
By the time we woke up from our post-drive siesta and decided to walk around Cambria, most of the stores on our end of town were closed so we decided to head up to the Cambria Pines Lodge for a somewhat early dinner on the patio. We chose this spot because they allowed our dog to dine with us and it has been around for quite a while.
Cambria Pine Lodge
It's on the top of a hill and must be a great place for weddings because the 2nd one of the day was taking place as we had our delicious dinner. I have to say, being pregnant makes dinner seem much cheaper since I'm not partaking in any beer or wine but this was a very reasonably priced restaurant. The two of us had appetizers, meals and dessert for less than $100 but the spot seemed quite fancy, you know?
The next day we decided to go to Hearst Castle but we were surprised to learn you have to be part of a tour or they won't even let you go up there. Since we had Kiyah with us and the next tour wasn't until noon and we had to get back and get laundry started we ended up just taking this shot and bailing:
Hearst Castle
On the way home we stopped in Morro Bay for lunch and to meander around Morro Rock for a bit since I'd never done that and thought I'd scratch it off my list. Let it be known, climbing said rock is not allowed. And though there are signs saying such ALL OVER THE PLACE there will inevitably be some asshole who thinks he's above the rules climbing the damn rock and getting cussed out by yours truly.
Morro Rock
All in all it was a nice getaway even though we didn't do very much other than drive around aimlessly and hope to stumble upon something nice to see. Like this storefront of rubber duckies:
Rubber Duckies

MORAL OF THAT STORY: A little bit of planning before a weekend getaway goes a long way.


Tummy Tuesday

Thank you all for your suggestions on the registry. I really should focus more on that here in the near future. I love the help of friends on the interwebs. Now if one of you would just volunteer to carry out the rest of my term for me that would be great...
Not much is new. As is apparently common in the 2nd trimester, I've gotten the itch to get away so this past weekend we went up to Cambria for a change of scenery. I'll blog about that later but that picture was taken at the bed & breakfast we stayed at. Aren't I a lady the way I have my leg thrown over husband's back? I swear I couldn't get comfortable lying down if my life depended on it. And body pillows are a joke. There. I said it.
The baby has chosen this week to start fluttering around like he's really going some place. Husband is quite anxious to be able to feel it but for now the protective tummy layer is acting as a preventative shield keeping the movement internal. I love that feeling. It's very comforting to know my little man is active in me.

Here's what babycenter.com has to say about 22 weeks:
At 11 inches (the length of a spaghetti squash) and almost 1 pound, your baby is starting to look like a miniature newborn. His lips, eyelids, and eyebrows are becoming more distinct, and he's even developing tiny tooth buds beneath his gums. His eyes have formed, but his irises (the colored part of the eye) still lack pigment. If you could see inside your womb, you'd be able to spot the fine hair (lanugo) that covers his body and the deep wrinkles on his skin, which he'll sport until he adds a padding of fat to fill them in. Inside his belly, his pancreas — essential for the production of some important hormones — is developing steadily.



Husband found this gem and shared it with me. The comments on the YouTube page were downright hilarious... that is until the dang pussoi of a moderator took them down.
This song? Is tragic.


Mini-vacay Haiku Friday

Leaving tomorrow
We're headed to Cambria
For an over-night
Bringing Kiyah, too
To the pet-friendly hotel
That is Creekside Inn
Visit Hearst Castle
Maybe the Madonna Inn
Take it real easy


Tummy Thursday

Now that the grandparents know the baby's going to be a boy the shopping has commenced. It's a good thing we made them wait four months otherwise the nursery would be bursting at the seams. This is from Husband's mom. Not sure if you can you tell, but they're from Michigan:

Isn't it funny how when a baby's on its way the guest room automatically gets renamed "THE NURSERY" even though there isn't even a crib in there yet? We also have four other outfits from my folks, 2 pairs of shoes from Auntie Kryst and a bounty of tineh socks. It's crazy to see such wee clothing in my house.
I recently decided that I'm very white and should probably let the sun hit parts of my body not often seen by daylight lest I blind the person delivering my baby, so I went out and got a swimsuit. Maybe I'll hit the pool and do some self-instructed water aerobics that BFF loves so. My first purchase was mildly hilarious:

Yeah... that got returned. It looks like a dress a little? I was told I could make it more formal for evening wear with pearls and heels. I ended up swapping this in for a two-piece, circus tent-like number which, if you can believe it, is actually way more flattering. The sarcasm on that last sentence is pretty heavy. I thought this was a good baby bump shot and clearly have lost all sense of shame. And to add insult to injury, my face has become an oil well so I have a goatee of pimples. Sexy? You betcha.
I also just recently started our Target registry. This is harder than the wedding registry by far because I have no idea what I need. If you want to leave me your "I can't live without" comments, I'd be grateful.

Here's what babycenter.com has to say about 21 weeks:
Your baby now weighs about three-quarters of a pound and is approximately 10-1/2 inches long - the length of a carrot. You may soon feel like he's practicing martial arts as his initial fluttering movements turn into full-fledged kicks and nudges. You may also discover a pattern to his activity as you get to know him better. In other developments, your baby's eyebrows and lids are present now.



I did it! I finished the three-page paper that isn't even due until the 19th! I said to myself, "Self, you really should knock this paper out before Glee." And I did. I sat there with my articles and my text book and I typed away at my wee little laptop. For like three hours straight. And I finished. An added bonus? I managed to stay up past my bed time and actually got to watch the glorious song and dance show that has stolen my heart. So it was like instant gratification. And Jesus wept.
The good thing about getting that paper out of the way? I'm basically presenting said paper in a PowerPoint/lecture format at the end of this month/beginning of May. So basically most of the footwork is out of the way. So now all I really have left to focus on is that godforsaken Capstone project I keep procrastinating on but if I can knock out three-pages in three hours I'm sure I can knock out twenty pages in about twenty days. Oh and there's a final exam on May 10th but whatever. Nothing new there. I just go in and hope for the best.
I would just like to thank my very dear friends and that crazy woman (a.k.a. "my mutha") who repeatedly told me to take small bites out of the task list rather than look at it as an overwhelming whole. It was quite helpful. And now I don't feel as daunted.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: If it weren't for the last minute, I wouldn't get anything done.


Good vs. Evil TMI Tuesday

1. If you could be a super hero or a super villain, which would you be and why?
I would be a super hero. I'm part Italian and a lapsed Catholic so the guilt of being a villain would definitely not be working in my favor. Plus I think my moral superiority would aid me greatly in the fight against crime.

2. What's your super alias?
I couldn't even think of an alias for this blog so I doubt I'd have a super hero alias. Besides, I'd want the world to be able to give me the recognition I so clearly deserve as their hero. I'm so very modest.

3. Name a friend as your sidekick, tell us who they are.
My sidekick would have to be my husband right? We'd be like The Incredibles. He already fancies himself to be Bob Parr (a.k.a. Mr. Incredible). Seems only natural that the baby on the way would also share our incredible, super hero-esque qualities. Hopefully, though, the boy child will not turn into a weird, flaming gremlin baby. I never understood that part of the flick.

4. What's your weakness(es)?
My weakness would be a home cooked meal saddled up next to a frosty mug of beer. Mmm... beer. Sober since December 17th. Holler.

5. What's your power(s)?
My power would be to follow up with you relentlessly until I get what I want. It seemed to work on Husband when I brow beat him into getting engaged and I believe I have mastered that power here at the workplace.

6. Does your costume have a cape? Do you wear a mask?
Big rule from The Incredibles once again - costumes should never have a cape! It'll get you killed... sucking you into airplane turbines and whatnot. I'll take the over-the-eye mask but anything more than that would give me claustrophobia.

Bonus (optional): Give us some back story on your character: Where did they originate? Do they have a secret lair? Does anyone know their secret identity?
I imagine my character would have originated out of the frustration of today's society - filled with whores and deviants. I blame MySpace. I'm horrible with secrets so I doubt my lair or identity would be too confidential.

Questions are from here.


Numbers Como BFF Does It

  • Bought Year One at the Target because it was on sale for $10. It was worth the laughs and cheaper than it would have been had we gone to the theater to see it. Silly, silly movie.
  • Also bought Weezer's Raditude at the Target because it was on sale for $9.99. You really can't go wrong with a Weezer album can you? I bought the first one with the blue cover way back in the day on an excursion to Tower Records in Los Angeles with the tío just because of the way the cover looked and I never looked back. Plus? A friend of a friend played on the Love is the Answer track. Good on ya, Sim.
  • My birthday is one month from today.
  • My boss returned to work after a 6-work day absence and told me he was proud of me for the work I did while he was gone. He rewarded me with a set of rosary beads from Italy. They're rose scented. Very tacky. WikiAnswers says there are 59 beads on a rosary. I did not know that until now. Bad Catholic.
  • I have a 20-page paper, a 3-page paper and a 20-minute presentation in addition to a final exam and all of this is happening within the next month. I'm officially freaking out.


National Cherish an Antique Haiku Friday

What a week it's been
Thank God it's Friday indeed
I'm utterly spent
Stupid work problems
Then a test last night at school
My cherry on top
Hitting "reset" now
Focusing on my school work


Finally! Hump Day!

You guys, this week has been killing me softly. No jokes. I mean, it's only Wednesday morning but Monday and yesterday sucked. Know how I know they sucked? Because I miss my boss who is in Italy for a week. My boss who is a real nice guy in real life but at work makes my hair turn gray. Seriously, I found my first gray hair last week. Unbelievable. He calls me nonstop and micromanages the shit out of me even though I'm a hundred times more organized than he is and just all around drives me crazy. And he knows it and I think he might get off on it a little. But I still love him and think he's a swell guy, just a freak of a boss.
I realize now why he is bald and paranoid and cranky. I can't for the life of me fathom how people so retarded (fuck PC today, seriously) manage to keep their jobs. It is mind boggling. I've literally had to tell two of our reps that they are fucking idiots. Like, in those exact words. It kills the soul a little bit to talk to people like that. I have made more follow up calls in the last two days than I have in my entire four-year span working here. Just the stupidest, most expensive mistakes. And they just keep on keepin' on.
I wonder if our customers think we're the inept ones... I've had two of them try to send me on vacation in the last two days. Ha. I guess that break will come when the baby does. The phones are already ringing with complaints and I still have coffee in my cup so I wonder if it'll be another doozy of a day. But I can't complain, I suppose. I have a job right? That's more than some folks can say. It's just too bad this job couldn't be a little less insane. I mean, we sell packaging - it's not brain surgery.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: The ineptitude of others means job security for me.


Tummy Tuesday

The news is out: It's a boy. In case you have never seen a penis on an ultrasound, I decided I would upload the picture we had. It's mildly hilarious that there is an arrow pointing to it that says BOY. We decided our child is very bold to just throw his junk at the camera like that. As a woman, I can honestly say I have never been that excited to see a penis in my entire life. Never. Husband and I were hootin' and hollerin' and giving high-fives like we were at a sporting event. It was a very momentous occasion for us both.
The big question everyone is asking is the name. We decided on Casey ages ago, maybe even before we conceived. It was Husband's mother's nickname growing up and there are 2 Dodgers with that name: Stengel and Blake. Interesting side note, Blake is on the roster now as #23 and we were married on the 23rd so that's kind of a neat coincidence. Another baseball connection is the poem Casey at the Bat from way back in the deezy. MLB expectations for our little one? Maybe. The middle name will be Douglas in my dad's honor. It melted Grandpa's heart to hear that news.
As far as pregnant goes... things are good. I weigh exactly as much as I did when I conceived so a big round of applause goes to morning sickness for weight control! I'm getting bigger and sleeping is getting less comfortable. I did splurge for a massage last Thursday since we're at the halfway point. Other than that, it's business as usual. I still miss beer the most.

Here's what babycenter.com has to say about the bambino:
Your baby weighs about 10 1/2 ounces now. He's also around 6 1/2 inches long from head to bottom and about 10 inches from head to heel - the length of a banana. (For the first 20 weeks, when a baby's legs are curled up against his torso and hard to measure, measurements are taken from the top of his head to his bottom - the "crown to rump" measurement. After 20 weeks, he's measured from head to toe). He's swallowing more these days, which is good practice for his digestive system. He's also producing meconium, a black, sticky by-product of digestion. This gooey substance will accumulate in his bowels, and you'll see it in his first soiled diaper (some babies pass meconium in the womb or during delivery).


Happy Belated Easter

Crusty made this for Next Friday...

In case you can't figure out this subtle riddle... IT'S A BOY!


Hello April Haiku Friday

Good Friday today
Will it live up to its name?
Only time will tell
Two weeks of crazy
Not exactly a "Spring Break"
But Bossman is gone
No more bad news please
I'm far too relaxed right now
Thanks to my massage


April Fool's Day

I really think that had I had my head on straight when I was younger, I could have and maybe should have pursued employment in law enforcement or some affiliated profession. Instead, I dropped out of college, worked a bunch of dead end jobs and kind of just winged it while feeling "irie" as the cool kids used to say. But alas, that's another story for another day.
My interest in prison life, the judicial system and forensics is practically a pastime for me. I love true crime novels, watching the National Geographic Lockdown specials and reading the msnbc Crime & Courts section. It might have something to do with how terrified I was to break the rules growing up. Sure, I dabbled in some experimental drug use and the like in high school like most of my friends and peers, but I almost never broke curfew and tried my damnedest to stay out of trouble with my parents. The idea of me breaking the law to the point of arrest or jail time was simply unheard of. Simply put, I am fascinated by what drives people to do the things they do.
Lately, there has been a disturbing trend that involves teenage violence and sexual activity. Maybe because I'm about to be a mother I find these stories both appalling and terrifying. Will my daughter be the one to decide that it's ok to sell herself for group sex at a party? Will my son be the one that thinks it's perfectly acceptable to kick the ever living shit out of his girlfriend over a text message? And the biggest question is always "Where the hell are the parents!?!" I simply can't fathom the trouble kids get into at what seems to be younger and younger ages.
As is only natural, I often wonder who or what is to blame. Parents can only do so much right? It's human nature for a teen or a child to rebel. What is it that pushes them over the edge though? Is it the hours spent playing violent video games that numbs a child to the reality of violence? Is it the faceless communication the internet and text messaging allows that has robbed us of real interpersonal relationships? Is it the incessant tabloid television and print coverage of sexual scandals that have robbed society of its moral fiber?
Of course, there is no easy answer. One could say "Look to religion" and the retort could easily bounce right back to the sexual abuse the Catholic church has been accused of more often than not lately. Growing up I hardly knew a friend with divorced parents and now it seems to be the norm. Where is the discipline? Has the importance of stressing self esteem robbed generations of the ideas of responsibility, accountability and liability? I'm ranting now. I guess sometimes I just shudder at the thought of what kind of world I'm bringing a child into and can't help but wonder if the worst is yet to come.