12.31.2010

Haiku Friday Belated Edition

A Bloody Mary
Started the day off just right
That was 9 a.m.
***
On to beer tasting
At the Ballast Point Brew Co
Growlers for the road
***
A glass of bubbly
Ring in the new year proper
With a hangover

12.30.2010

TGTBTU - Belated Edition

The Good
I had the day off which we used to drive down to see BFF & Co.

The Bad
It took us 4.5 hours to drive to San Diego from Oxnard. Traffic was a Bye-otch.

The Ugly
The Amezquitas gifted Casey with an "Ugly Doll" named Big Toe.

12.29.2010

How I Love A Good Letter

To My Landlord and The Property Management People,

This letter is in regards to our professional relationship with the employees at **** and their handyman, ****. I would just like to say that there has never been an instance where it hasn't been an absolute pleasure working with this management firm. They are always available by phone and **** even extended me the courtesy of giving me his personal number in case he needed to be contacted outside of office hours. Whenever we have had an issue, they have dealt with it quickly, effectively and professionally. Not only are they professional, but they have consistently treated us like we are not only tenants or renters but friends. Each time I have seen **** since I was pregnant, he has made an effort to ask about my son and each time I speak with **** it is always a casual and enjoyable conversation. I think that sort of personal touch is what really makes this professional relationship even more special.

I would also like to thank you for finally putting up the bird strips to get rid of what is essentially a vermin problem with the pigeons. For a year and a half we have dealt with pigeon excrement on and around the rental property, personally trying to deal with a situation that is no less than a health risk. On a number of occasions, Husband has done his best to try and hose down the nests and excrement on the arches. What a pleasure it was to see **** finally rectifying the situation yesterday afternoon when we initially asked for the problem to be handled upon move-in in 2008. With a new baby, his health is of the utmost priority to us and without pigeons nesting above our windows, I feel all of us can only benefit.

It seems like an ideal time to address the termite problem we also noticed when we moved in June of 2008. When **** took over the property, they had an exterminator come and assess the situation. He determined there was indeed a problem and recommended a tenting. Here we are, years later and there is still a very real termite problem. Our garage and perimeter fence seem to be suffering the most damage. While it is not affecting our quality of life, the garage door is quite close to falling apart and if it could be structurally reinforced we would appreciate it a great deal.

Before I close this letter I would like to note that while we had requested early termination of our lease, our circumstances have changed and we will be able to complete our lease, vacating the premises prior to June 30, 2011. We were going to have to vacate because my grandparents who are in poor health were going to have to be put into a home and we were going to purchase their house. We requested to break the lease early and were told we'd be able to work something out. Unfortunately for my grandparents, other arrangements must be made because my grandfather's health is rapidly deteriorating. Thus, we no longer are in a rush to move out of our place or into theirs while these new arrangements are being put in place. On Christmas eve we received a letter basically saying we would not be able to work anything out and we'd be responsible for the remaining months in the lease. First of all, that is in poor form to send a letter like that to arrive at our home on a holiday. I gave that notice months ago and should have been told then or I'm sure it could have waited another week. To get that letter on Christmas Eve, it was both a disappointment and a point of frustration for us.

I feel that we have been better than average tenants who have paid rent on time if not early every month. We came into our rental agreement with an overgrown and dead yard that had to be torn apart and replanted and we have maintained nice looking landscaping in the back and the front of our unit for years at our own cost. I am quite sure this small effort will go a long way in helping you rent the property more quickly when we vacate. When the most recent tenant in B was clearly destroying your property, we tried to keep you abreast of the situation not to be irritants but because in the long run he was going to do more harm than good. The longer he lived there and harassed the other tenants with his extremely loud music and drunken antics, the more of a burden you would have. It would have been nice to have received the same kind of courtesy in our time of need.

We look forward to working with you for the next six months and wish you the best of luck in filling the vacancy next door.
Have a happy new year.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: You start off with some warm fuzzies, stab 'em a little in the middle and close off with a kiss and a hug.

12.28.2010

Casey Tuesday

  • Casey is 18 weeks old today.
  • His 1st Christmas was a success. He was spoiled rotten. His gifts covered our entire couch.
  • His 4-month milestone portraits came out no less than stellar.
  • He is really into making monosyllabic grunting sounds right now. It's reminiscent of Eep Op Ork Ah Ah (that means I love you) or Ooh Eee Oh Ah Ah Ting Tang Walla Wall Bing Bang.
  • He and I have the pleasure of his Dad's company since Thursday the 16th.
  • On the 30th we'll depart for a 2-day visit to see BFF & Co. in San Diego.

12.24.2010

Christmas Eve Haiku Friday

Baby's First Christmas
Twas the night before at least
He's sure to be spoiled
***
He's so very wee
Yet the tree's overflowing
All gifts for Casey
***
Can't wait to see our
Apartment burst at the seams
With loads of his toys

12.23.2010

TGTBTU - Christmas Edition

The Good
I only work half-day today and from the looks of it "work" is in theory only. And the word on the street is we're all getting pre-paid Visa cards from the Bossmen today so HOLLER! Also? It stopped raining, there were no cars on the street and I didn't have to take Casey to Maria's this morning so I had time for a Caramel Brulée latte at Starbucks. Yum!

The Bad
Husband and I have to take Casey to the mall for his 4-month portraits at JC Penney's at 3 o'clock. Essentially the day before Christmas. To. The. Mall. Looking for parking oughtta be lots of fun but hopefully everyone else will be shopping instead of waiting to get their pictures taken.

The Ugly
Holiday blues or a Blue Christmas if your Elvis. This week I've not only been under the weather but utterly depressed and it has effected not only me but my entire family and most likely my friends that have listened to me be upset over it. Crying at my desk. Angry at home. It's just no good. So hopefully today is a new day and I can put all that behind me.

12.21.2010

Casey Tuesday

Casey is 17 weeks old today. He'll be 4 months old on Christmas eve. I can hardly believe how fast the time is passing. He is developing so quickly and can now really grab on to things, including but not limited to my nose, lip, his dangly toys and hair. He's making a lot more noise and I love it. Yesterday I dropped him off at home with Husband on my lunch hour and when I left to go back to work, Husband said Casey looked at him and the door repeatedly as if asking where I went. If that doesn't melt your cold, dark heart nothing will. We think he'll probably be left-handed like Husband because that's the hand he uses most to reach for things. I'm really looking forward to his first Christmas, but already he has made the holiday so much better than its ever been.

12.20.2010

Movie Review Monday

We'll start today's reviews off with the one in theaters now: Tangled. I'm a bit behind in seeing this one as it came out on Thanksgiving but normally Disney cartoon releases are a priority of mine. I will say that I really enjoyed this movie all the way up to the end. I can't tell you what the last minute was about unless I use my imagination because there was no volume at our viewing but I won't complain too much about it because we got comped with free tickets. I really like that Disney is getting a bit more modern in their fairy tales but are still able to remain true to them. Gone are the damsels in distress yet they still manage to keep a pretty good romantic storyline going. Even the songs were fantastic (atta girl, Mandy Moore!). I totally loved the wee animal friends as well. And the best part about it is, even in 2D, the movie didn't lose any of its appeal. I like that. It's a sign of a good movie when it doesn't rely on stupid tricks and just tells a great story. And I also can't wait to watch this one over and over on DVD.


Next is a movie I blogged about a while back but can't seem to find a link to. It's a documentary done by the brilliant minds at Dickhouse (a.k.a. Johnny Knoxviille): The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia. We've been on a long waiting list for Netflix but it finally showed up over the weekend. From the trailer you basically think you are going to see the definition of white trash incarnate. This is sort a follow-up on a PBS special from back in the day called The Dancing Outlaw about a tap dancing, Appalachian legend named Jesco White. Instead of just focusing on him, though, they decided to do a documentary about his extended family as well: an outlaw group of law-breaking, state-certified crazies. You think they're going to be exploited for the sake of entertainment but then you really see how these people, as insane as they may act, are just like you and me with family troubles and real-life issues. It was as touching as it was jaw dropping to watch. I wouldn't recommend this to just anyone but if you like to take a look into the seedier, more random underbelly of these United States, this documentary paints quite a picture.

12.17.2010

8 Days 'Til Xmas Haiku Friday

Letters to Santa
Weepy segment on the news
Bad economy
***
Much different wish lists
For food, clothes, necessities
And gifts for others
***
Makes me feel grateful
We have much more than many
True Christmas Spirit

12.16.2010

TGTBTU - NuvaRing Edition


The Good
I can't endorse this form of birth control any more than I do. I swear I should be their spokesperson. Literally 2 months after I took that thing out I was pregnant. I had been using it for a couple years prior and NOTHING. I'd say that is some spectacular protection. Also? I think it helped dry up my boobs when I put it in after the decision was made to stop breastfeeding. Like clockwork, when I took that thing out 3 weeks later, Aunt Flo came knocking. And I don't get migraines with this bad boy like I did with the pill. Holler.

The Bad
I think the weight gain side effect is a reality. Either that or it's the PMS. Whatever is to blame, I can't stop shoveling sweet and salty goodies in my mouth and thus I believe I will be morbidly obese by the arrival of 2011.

The Ugly
While I'm glad to have a legit period again, I bled for like 10 weeks straight after Casey was born so I'm not too pumped on the idea of bleeding again after only a 6-week bloodless run. Blood.

12.15.2010

Changes

When I was younger, I always wondered why my parents didn't have more friends. I always had lots of friends I talked to or visited or did things with and my parents just seemed to have each other. I thought it was so weird and that they were kind of lame because of it. Here I am, years later, married and a mother, and I look at my life and I realize I've become my parents. Sure, I still have friends but I'm lucky if I talk to them once or twice a month on the phone and maybe if see them once or twice a year in person. We're scattered all across the country and we're busy with our own jobs and families. My husband has become my best friend and he is the one I talk to and do things with. My spare time is completely devoted to him, the baby, our extended family, chores and errands and at the end of every weekend I want to kick myself that I didn't find the time to make overdue phone calls to catch up with my girls. I find myself thinking about my friendships quite often and always try my best to acknowledge my girlfriends with emails or cards ore pictures of the baby each month. I want them to know that although our communications have dwindled, they are always in my heart and in my thoughts. Sometimes I feel a bit melancholy and mourn the loss of the girls' nights out and hour long gossip sessions that made the telephone burn up my ear but I imagine those will return in time when I am not a single, working mother for most of the week and spending my weekends trying to make up for lost time with my husband. I want to be able to do nice things like buy Christmas and birthday presents for our friends but our budget is tight because Husband and I are buying a house yet continue to live two separate lives in two separate cities. Plus, we're parents now and any spare change really belongs to Casey. However, when I say these things aloud, they always sound like excuses I'm making to justify why I am failing as a friend. I don't know what brought on this overwhelming sense of loss and sadness but here it is. Spilled on the pages of this blog to lighten the burden on my mind.

MORAL OF THIS STORY: Girlfriends, if you are reading this, please know I still love you and hold you in the utmost highest regard, I just haven't figured out how to balance my life yet. I wouldn't be the woman I am without you and can't imagine a future where I couldn't call you friend.

12.14.2010

Casey Tuesday


  • Casey is 16 weeks old today.
  • In 10 days, he'll be 4 months old.
  • He is very chatty lately, especially so at 5 a.m. today.
  • For weeks he has only woken 1 time at night, usually around 2 a.m.
  • I weighed myself then weighed myself holding Casey and we think he's about 15 pounds.
  • He's definitely wearing clothes intended for 6-month old babies.
  • Over the weekend we went to Ojai and the guy at the candy shop gave him his 1st red balloon. It got away once and flew into a tree but Husband picked me up so I could retrieve it. The 2nd time it flew into the blue sky, irretrievable.
  • We got stopped 3 times at the supermarket by 3 different people who wanted to tell us how cute our son was. I love that.

12.10.2010

Palin Hatin' Haiku Friday

Damn Sarah Palin
Why won't you just go away?
I'm sick of your face
***
And Barbara Walters,
You should be very ashamed
"most fascinating"
***
She's an idiot
Who makes women look so bad
We must boycott her

Extra: Why Husband Thinks She's Awful

She's a cartoon that totes a gun and a fishin' pole but wears short suits and pushes her tits up to look hot. She barfs out all these redneck ideals veiled under a hairdo and a complete set of teeth. And, when it all boils down, she's a full on fraud that plays like she's country and down home when in reality she's slapping every Midwestern hard working blue collar American in the face by insisting she's just like the rest of us. She doesn't even have a thought in between her ears that can come close to predicting the pulse of America, mostly because she's drunk and sick with fame-whoring and getting attention any way she can get it. She's a political Kardashian plain and simple and should be kept far away from influencing her own children, not to mention the future of our nation.

12.09.2010

TGTBTU

The Good:
Karma. Here's the scoop: I ordered something via Macy's online on Black Friday at like 5 a.m. or something stupid because I was up with Casey. The cancellation policy stated I had to cancel within an hour of ordering and when I realized I messed up the order I tried to do just that. However, unlike Amazon.com or any other commerce website I've used, there is no option to just cancel your order online which is absolutely ridiculous but whatever. I call the 800 number (which, by the way, automated dialing that takes ages to get to what you need can suck my dick) and they aren't open until 9 a.m. so I call at promptly 9 a.m. but by that time apparently the order has already been processed. How retarded is that? Seriously. They ended up shipping me the stuff, I get it a few days later and I return it to the store. Inconvenient but ultimately no biggie. Then I get an email saying they received my stuff and were crediting my account. I just figured they were confirming my return to the store. Nope. I got credited twice. I wonder if they'll catch that. Either way I'm pumped to owe no money to them other than postage!

The Bad:
Husband had to work all 5 days this week. This is the first time this has happened since before Casey was born. While being a single mother is getting easier as Casey gets older, it's no fun not having my partner-in-crime around.

The Ugly:
My hair is falling out and my boobs are deflated.

12.08.2010

Fillmore & Western Railway

A while back Husband proclaimed he wanted to cut down his own Christmas tree this year. In an issue of our AAA magazine, they highlighted the Fillmore & Western Railway Christmas Tree Holiday Train. I thought it would be a slightly cheesy yet fun way for our little family to celebrate Casey's first tree experience so I bought tickets because they were reasonably priced and we were on our way. It's about a 24-mile drive from Oxnard to Fillmore so we got up bright and early, as we would any other day with a baby who despises sleeping in, and got on the road to get to the station 45-minutes prior to our 10 a.m. departure per the recommendation. Will-call tickets were easy to pick up and I don't think we needed to be there that early but there was a holiday craft shop and a carousel and stuff to help pass the time. There were no strollers allowed on the train because it was at capacity and that was kind of not ideal seeing as we have a 3-month old but c'est la vie. Santa walked up and down the center of the train that was decorated with garland to visit with the kiddos and hand out candy canes. We were on the train for a good 40 minutes when we realized we were headed to the Santa Paula Tree Farm. What's funny about that is we had driven through Santa Paula to get to Fillmore. The drive from Oxnard to Santa Paula is about 15 miles. So... yeah... a bit redundant. I had assumed we'd be going to a tree farm that was a little further off the beaten path. I guess I'm a bit of a tree snob because I didn't find the trees all that gorgeous out at the farm but Husband managed to find a suitable one. Mind you, this was after a pretty lengthy - and mildly exhausting thanks to carrying a heavy baby - walking tour between rows and rows of trees. He claimed it was anticlimactic to cut the tree down because I was not there to watch him do it but Casey needed to be changed and fed so what can you do? There's not exactly a baby-friendly place to handle your business so I ended up changing and feeding him on a hay bail where other children were running and jumping all around us. The tree farm also had pony and camel rides, a hot dog stand and sno-cones. If you are a retard (and I will not be PC and use another word so there) and need to be told this, hot dog stands do not take debit cards. Lord help us all to remember that one should always have cash on one's self in the case of emergency. Amen. The train departed promptly and our return was only remarkable because we screeched to a halt for some unknown reason. We managed to disembark and unload the tree in reasonable time. All in all, a pleasant experience with some pretty views of orchards and California's finest landscapes but sort of unnecessary in the long run.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: Skip this if your child isn't old enough to appreciate it otherwise you're just spending more time and money than you need to in order to chop down your own tree.

12.07.2010

Casey Tuesday

Casey is 15 months weeks old today and he has been blowing my mind lately. The other night we put him on his stomach for some post-bath tummy time like we always do. I looked up to say something to Husband and when I looked down he was on his back. Naturally, since I missed it, I put him on his tummy so he could do it again. And he did! I was screaming! So neat! When I tried for a third, he was over it and he wouldn't do it again last night so I don't know if it was a fluke or not but it was still very exciting. Last night I was "zerberting" (Thanks, Cosby Show!) his belly and he was laughing. Not just a little "heh" but a full on giggle. My heart officially melted. Over the weekend we schlepped him on the Christmas tree train and all over the Christmas tree farm and he was 100% well-behaved. I'm so glad he does so well when we're out and about. The only thing about a tree farm is it isn't exactly baby friendly. The train wouldn't let us bring a stroller on so I was carrying him and a diaper bag all over the place and let's just say that Casey isn't exactly light. Then I had to change his diaper on a hay bail and that was a whole other level of ridiculous. The good thing is, he didn't seem to mind at all. Love my little friend! Such a trouper.

12.03.2010

Spreading Christmas Cheer Haiku Friday

So dang much to do
Laundry and grocery shopping
Other household chores
***
Saturday the tree
Taking the Fillmore Choochoo
Chopping ours down, son!
***
Tonight and Sunday
Helping my family members
Decorate their homes

12.02.2010

TGTBTU

The Good
My darling son had a fantastic night last night. Not only did he sit nicely all through dinner out with my mother, he only woke up once at 2:30 a.m. Being rested makes such a huge difference in my life and I am sure it does in Casey's as well. I'm also stoked that Husband will be home tonight ending my shift as a single mommy until he leaves again on Monday at oh'dark early.

The Bad
My 9-year old Husky-Malamute mix is not adapting well to the idea that Casey isn't going anywhere. She's so used to being the focus of attention that she's turned into this abused shadow of her former self. I hired people to walk her during the day since it is too dark for me to do so with the baby after work but it doesn't seem to be placating her. I try to play with her and she rolls over submissively or cowers like I've just beaten her. She's constantly under my feet and as much as I know she's trying to be affectionate, her being that close to me and the baby makes me nervous and claustrophobic. It's quite stressful trying to be a good mommy to both her and Casey. I sort of just wish she'd be the old dog that is content to just lay around rather than this ever-youthful bundle of neediness.

The Ugly
Every winter when the heater comes on and the cold weather becomes dry, I get this cold-sore like blister on the inside of my nose. It gets all crusty (not to be confused with Crusty) and bloody and swells up so my nostril becomes this tiny sliver of a hole. Pretty huh? Boogers.

12.01.2010

Casey's 1st Mall Santa

When your babysitter isn't available in the morning and you have to go to the mall anyway, it is the ideal time to get your 3 month old's picture taken with Santa. Not too many people at the mall at 10 a.m. on a Wednesday. It's especially special when your son decides he won't smile for a picture but he'll smile his fool head off for the ladies at the jewelry store. Also special? The spit up on the sleeve and the fact that his jeans finally fit him.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: If a Saturday or Sunday in December was the only time I could have gone to the mall, Casey would have no Santa picture unless we found a Santa roaming the streets randomly and we captured that special moment with our cell phone camera.

11.30.2010

Casey Tuesday

My little man turns 14 weeks old today. It's shocking that he has been in my life for three whole months. I don't know what it was but over the weekend I was just overwhelmed with love for him. It was like his cuteness consumed me. He makes the funniest faces and sounds now. The formula has done wonders for him. He used to poop all the time, like every diaper had at least a skid mark in it. Now? He can go like 3 days without a poop. It's sort of funny when he finally has to go. If he is on one of our chests, he'll push with his feet on our tummy until his butt is in the air and he makes these funny cooing "ooh ahh" sounds. Poop talk. I must be a mother. In babysitter talk, we are so lucky to have found Maria. She charges us practically nothing and then takes what little money we give her and buys him outfits. Last week she didn't want us to pay for the whole week because we had him at home for 3 out of the 5 days. I told her I'd rather just pay her so I hope she doesn't put up a fight when I pay her again this week. I just don't know how we got so lucky. On another somewhat Casey-related topic, my boobs dried up. Thank God for small miracles. I was done with all the peppermint and sage and sports bras. Over it.

11.29.2010

Movie Review Monday

It takes a special movie for us to get a sitter for Casey and the first installment of the final Harry Potter release was good enough for us. I will say this, Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part I was a pretty scary two and a half hours. Even the color palette of the movie was dark. With all the snakes and spiders and shooting of wands, I found myself hiding in my hoodie or practically jumping onto Husband's lap quite a bit. He and I had a discussion afterward that the whole Voldemort versus the Muggles was very reminiscent of the Holocaust: The Ministry and Hermione getting "Mudblood" ripped into her arm by Bellatrix Lestrange... Yeah. I think between that and the nude scene between Harry and Hermione, though tastefully done, definitely warranted the PG-13 rating yet there were tiny children in the theater with us. Had I been one of them? I may have been scarred for life. So scary. I hope as Casey gets older, I have more common sense than some of the parents out there when it comes to taking him to age-appropriate movies.

As for the Netflix viewing, we watched How To Train Your Dragon. I can't give enough praise to this movie. Although I am not a 3D advocate, I can see how this could have been very impressive in that form. The Blue Ray alone was sort of blowing my mind especially with the scenes where they are flying through the sky and over the sea - so pretty. This is a story about a young Viking that just doesn't seem to have the same kind of blood lust when it comes to dragons as the rest of his village. Instead, he has a knack for taming them and basically ends up blowing the minds of the other Vikings even though he's a wet noodle of a kid and they're all big and brawny. It totally didn't sound like my kind of movie when it came out but was wildly popular. In hindsight, I sort of wish we'd seen this in the theater. It's smart and funny and I totally wept more than once because of its Father/Son storyline. I swear to God, all I do is cry.

11.26.2010

Tryptophan Heavy Haiku Friday

Delicious turkey
Candied yams, mashed potatoes
Green bean casserole
***
Butter-laden rolls
Family recipe stuffing
Copious wine pours
***
QT with the fam
Deadly sinning together
Gluttony and sloth

11.25.2010

TGTBTU: Turkey Day Edition

The Good:
We get to spend another Thanksgiving with the elderly. As they are 85, each holiday spent together is more and more cherished. I just love it that they get to enjoy their great grandchildren.

The Bad:
My in-laws still want to live in Michigan. I wish they'd all move out here where the weather is better. Plus, you know, they'd be close to us. Holidays apart are hard on everyone. (I said hard on.)

The Ugly:
The exorbitant amounts of food, beverage and calories to be consumed today.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

11.24.2010

Thankful

On this, the hallowed eve of Thanksgiving (or El Día de Gracias) I thought I would take a moment to list some things I am thankful for this year:
  • I have a healthy and happy marriage.
  • I am a mother to an adorable, healthy son.
  • My grandparents will soon be in an assisted living home, the best for both of them.
  • My parents are helping us buy a house.
  • My neighbors are generously walking Kiyah so she doesn't feel neglected.
  • I work for a company that was able to give me a bonus.
  • My husband and I are both employed in these economic times.
  • I stopped bleeding.
  • I have a new niece or nephew on the way.
  • My family has a roof over their heads, food in their stomachs and clothes on their backs.
  • I graduated from college and am done with school forever.
  • I have money in the bank.
  • We have an amazingly affordable and wonderful babysitter for Casey.
  • Husband has great friends who let him live with them for free while he works hundreds of miles away from his family.
MORAL OF THAT STORY: Times may seem rough but every cloud has a silver lining. I just needed to look at the things I have to be grateful for rather than dwell on the negative.

11.23.2010

Happy Birthday, CD!

Please wish my friend Crusty a happy birthday.
And tease her about her senior picture.

Casey Tuesday


  • Today, Casey is 13 weeks old.
  • He will be 3 months old tomorrow.
  • This picture was taken at 7:37 a.m. on the way to Maria's when it was 45 degrees outside.
  • He's wearing a hoodie for the first time and he's none too happy about it. He's actually probably not happy about his hiccups but whatevs.
  • For the last 2 nights he has only woken up 1 time at about 3 a.m.
  • I credit this to switching to formula and upping his intake from 4 to 6 ounces.
  • Last night he kept me up after his bottle until 4 a.m. because he felt like crying until I put him on his tummy which instantly threw him into a deep slumber. Okaaaaaaaaaaay.
  • After not pooping for 2-1/2 days he had 1 EPIC deuce. It coated the diaper and came out the back of it. We had to hose him down in the shower. Husband said it looked like green tea soft serve. I thought pea soup. Either way, his poops will never be the same.

11.22.2010

Mammary Monday

I am going through the milk suppression process because I decided to stop breastfeeding Casey. His babysitter told me last week that he was spitting up a lot with the milk I had pumped for her so she tried the formula and, lo and behold, he didn't spit up and he slept better with less gas. Since Maria has four grown children of her own and basically raised my nephew and his cousin, I am going to take her word for the gospel truth. When you Google lactation suppression, you get some crazy answers so I decided to take a handful of them and give them a shot:
  • Cabbage leaves - I had such a hard time getting a leaf off the head of cabbage that I decided not to do this. Supposedly you refrigerate the leaves, put them in your bra with your nipple exposed and the rest of the breast covered. I think it's probably just a cooling issue so I bought reusable, breast-intended freezer pads instead. They work wonders for comfort and engorgement.
  • Vitamin B6 - Apparently 200 mg a day for 5 days will work to ease engorgement. B6 supposedly also aids peripheral nerves, skin, mucous membranes, and the blood cell system.
  • Sage - Since I'm not down with tea I got an alcohol tincture of Sage which is a liquid herbal extract. It is also 68-78% proof. The dumb lady at the health food store said to just do a straight dropper. This led to me gagging for about 20 minutes with my burnt uvula. Let me tell you, Sage tastes like shit. Instead, add a dropper (30-40 droplets) in a little bit of water, take the shot and then chase it with your favorite beverage every six hours.
  • Peppermint - It is also suggested that Altoids will help. Not like a couple a day but a bunch. Go figure.
  • Estrogen based birth control - Yup! Back on the trusted NuvaRing. Since I haven't had what I can assume is a "real" period since Casey was born, I just put it in yesterday. We'll see how that goes but in the meantime, we're going to double up with condoms for added protection (when we get a MOMENT to be intimate. Heh. Intimate.)
  • Pump to comfort - Lumpy milk ducts are not a good thing. And an engorged boob is painful. I think I pumped twice yesterday and then went about 12 hours without pumping. I only pump about 2 ounces from one boob and 1 from the other. Tapering down will help you avoid blocked ducts and mastitis. I also massaged the lumps in the shower and expressed a bit of the milk then. Bliss.
  • Sports bra - Wear it all day and in your sleep; basically all the time unless you're in the shower. This is more for comfort to keep your tender jubblies from bouncing around all the time. I am not taking the advice to wrap an Ace bandage tightly around your boobs because all evidence points to that leading to blocked ducts. It may have worked for some, but I'm not taking a chance on mastitis.
  • Breast pads - You don't want to leak through your blouse now do you?
  • Ibuprofen - Yeah. This shit hurts.
I hope you find this helpful! Wish me luck!

11.19.2010

Burnt Out Haiku Friday

First week back at work
It is almost behind me
Just not soon enough
***
A brand new routine
With Husband back in SD
It's not been easy
***
With each passing day
I'm hopeful for a reprieve
From the stress I feel

11.18.2010

TGTBTU

The Good:
I didn't forget anything today when I dropped Casey off at Maria's! It only took 3 days but I think I'm getting the swing of things. Husband comes home tonight so he'll have Casey tomorrow and I won't have to sweat another trip to the sitter until Monday. Also, I hired a dog walker so my poor neglected Kiyah can get some exercise.

The Bad:
I seem to have dislocated and or twisted the everliving H. E. Double Hockey Sticks out of my left knee. I had it propped up on Bossman's desk and then it was like instant excruciating pain. So that's fun because it's not like I'm constantly moving around holding a 14-pound baby and schlepping him up and down stairs all night or anything. Um... the sarcasm is being spread on pretty thick.

The Ugly:
I'm trying to figure out this whole pumping thing and it's making for some ugly boobies. Monday I pumped 3 times and didn't really have a problem but I'm trying to build up a surplus and didn't think that'd be enough. Tuesday I pumped four times and that was too many so I had flattened pancake boobs by the time I got home. I don't think Casey was impressed. Yesterday I only pumped twice for some reason and all night I had to deal with engorged boobs and lumpy milk ducts. Lord help me. We'll shoot for 3 today.

11.17.2010

A Hard Day's Night

So... for the last three days I have forgotten something whilst bringing the baby to his sitter. The first day I forgot the milk in the fridge at work so I had to rush the next morning to pick it up from work before I went to the sitter. The second day, as I dropped him off, I walked out of the door with the diaper bag still on my shoulder. Today, you will be able to find his diaper bag still in my vehicle. I swear I am losing my mind. I will have to go by today at lunch and deliver more milk and the bag. Luckily, she has diapers and such at her house already that we were bright enough to drop off last week. I guess we do a few things right. Ultimately, my goal is to get a good enough stash of milk built up at her place that I don't have to go by EVERY DAY AT LUNCH. Because as nice as it is that I can do that, I don't want to. I want Casey to get used to Maria and I want at least an hour a day where I'm not working and/or thinking about a baby-related task.
Thankfully, the nights and mornings have been a cinch. Here's what my Monday through Friday is going to look like:
  • Wake up with the baby around 6:30 and feed and change him.
  • Get in the shower and get ready while he's in his Baby Einstein chair.
  • Put him in the crib to gaze at the Pooh mobile while I make the bed and put on my face.
  • Take him downstairs and plop him in another chair while I take care of the dog.
  • Get him in the car and off to Maria's so I can be to work by 8 a.m.
  • Work and pump, take a lunch to deliver milk, work and pump.
  • Pick him up from Maria's at 5 pm.
  • Get him home and in the bath.
  • Try to feed myself around 6:30 while playing with him as he lies on the floor. I also need to appease the dog by playing with her simultaneously.
  • Feed him and get us both to sleep, then proceed to wake several times during the night to feed and change him.
  • Do it all again the next day.
MORAL OF THAT STORY: Single mothers who work full-time deserve a medal of honor. Seriously.

11.16.2010

Casey Tuesday

Casey is 12 weeks old today. Yesterday began a new chapter for both of us: I returned to work; he began his life with a babysitter. On Sunday night he decided at his 3:30 wake-up that he didn't feel like falling back to sleep immediately and kept me up until 5:15. I had to wake up at 6:15 for work. Awesome. I doubt that little stunt made it an easy day for either of us but I think I suffered more since he was able to sleep all day. I know this because when I brought the boob milk I'd pumped over to Maria's at noon, he was sleeping soundly on her bed which made me weep a little.
When I dropped him off with the sitter he was all smiles but when I picked him up, I had to fight to get him to smile at me. I didn't quite succeed but it was a good time to be reunited nonetheless. BFF warned me he'd smell like the sitter but it was shocking regardless. I plopped him in the bath promptly, we proceeded to play a bit and he was asleep by 7:30. That's crazy, right? We went from being together 24/7 to having only a couple hours a day together? It's pretty sad but I think Maria is going to treat him very well and eventually Casey will grow to love her as much as his cousin Ethan did when she was watching him.

11.15.2010

Movie Review Monday

You would think think that me having a baby would prevent me from renting a movie called Babies. However, despite the redundancy, I really enjoyed this documentary. It follows the lives of four babies from around the globe. There is hardly any dialogue aside from the random adult saying something to their baby and the sounds from the babies themselvse, though that hardly counts does it? Seeing this made me realize that Americans really spoil their children. Shocking revelation, I know. I also felt that the San Francisco family they chose to spotlight made Americans look like a bunch of overindulgent, dirty hippies so that was sort of a bummer. There are scenes that will absolutely blow your mind like the Namibian mother wiping her daughter's ass on her knee and then wiping the poop off her knee with an old corn cob, just to name one. There are also scenes that will just make you smile your fool head off. I highly recommend this one if you dig babies.

11.12.2010

Mid-November Haiku Friday

Santa Ana Winds
They stopped blowing long enough
For an a.m. walk
***
Our destination?
The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf
Just one mile away
***
Mom, Dad & Baby
And we can't forget Kiyah
Strolling together

11.11.2010

TGTBTU

The Good
It's Veteran's Day so Husband has today and tomorrow off. This will allow me to go for a pedicure this morning, my first since Casey was about two weeks old. Overdue much?

The Bad
Casey gets restless after his 3 a.m. wake-up and basically grunts and groans and kicks and squirms until 6 a.m. This means, I don't really get sleep aside from when I go to bed until 3 a.m.
Also? I found out yesterday we pay $150 more a month than everyone else in our 4-unit buidling. Not cool.

The Ugly
This morning Casey had a big ol' green eye booger and had spit up so he had milk crusted all up in his hairdo. Also? Probably my feet. See aforementioned long overdue pedicure.

11.10.2010

Time

The birthday boy with his nephew

My brother Curtis turns 29 today. Sometimes I feel like I can remember him coming home for the first time. I was 4-1/2 years old. I recall my mother coming through the garage with him. I have so many memories of us growing up together and how we have gone from trying to murder one another as children to the friendship and adult relationship we share now. I also remember how disgusted I was when he started getting armpit hair. Now he's a grown ass man and a father of one with another on the way. Unbelievable.

Husband is coming home tonight. This time he was only gone for three days so it wasn't so bad and for the remainder of the month he works short weeks but what's going to happen when he's gone for five days in a row again? It's about time someone get him a mother-lovin' transfer up here so we can live together and I don't have to do the countdown I always do whenever he leaves.

Usually Hump Days are happy occasions but I'm not so sure about this one. This one marks the halfway point of my last week at home with Casey. While I'm excited to get back to the grown up world of working, I guess I don't feel that great about my son spending the majority of his time with another woman. I will have had him all to myself for almost 12 weeks by the time I go back to work. It's finally getting easier to interpret his moods. His schedule is pretty consistent. Hell, we even battled his first cold together and we both got through it alive. Just when it starts getting easy, I have to give up my time with him. It really is true when people tell you time will go by so fast and to appreciate the moments I have with him while he is little. He has changed so much in this short period of time. He's developing his wee personality and is changing physically as well, getting chubbier and longer. Whenever I look at him, I can't believe I made him. Inside me. Blows me away.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: "Time is free but it's priceless. You can't own it, but you can use it. You can't keep it, but you can spend it. Once you've lost it, you can never get it back." - Harvey MacKay

11.09.2010

Casey Tuesday


  • Casey is eleven weeks old today.
  • I only have four more working days left with Casey before I go back to the office.
  • His cold is still going strong almost seven days later.
  • When we took him to the doctor on Friday, he weighed thirteen pounds, eleven ounces.
  • We have established a great routine of going to bed at eight, waking up around three, and then again at six. I hope this continues. It's usually: bath, play, boob/bottle, bed.
  • This is our second week with Husband back in San Diego and Casey and I miss him something awful. When he came home last week, Casey greeted him with eyes as big as saucers and a smile to match. I know the feeling.

11.05.2010

First Haiku Friday of November

Only one full week
Left to hang with Casey D
Then it's back to work
***
My poor little friend
Still has the sniffles, a cough
Gonna see the doc
***
I'm sure nothing's wrong
But we'll get our peace of mind
Maybe learn something

11.04.2010

TGTBTU

The Good:
Husband will be back home today after 4 long days without him. We're fortunate this month that he only has to work short weeks, alternating between 3 and 4 days away.

The Bad:
Being a single mom is not fun and so help me I hope Husband can get some work up here sooner than later. I love spending these last few days with Casey full-time but between him and the neediest dog alive, I am hustling unless I'm sleeping.

The Ugly:
The sounds coming out of Casey are reminiscent of Darth Vader and this is not pretty. Thanks to Santa Ana winds and heat, he is congested and suffering. I keep suctioning his snot and digging out man-sized boogers but they keep regenerating. He's all coughs, sneezes and sadness. Poor little friend.

11.03.2010

Finally!

I have been on the cusp of tipping the scale below 200 pounds for a little while now and today it finally happened. It's just under that mark, so I know I must be diligent, but it's under 200 nonetheless. Before Casey was born, I weighed about 238. He weighed 8 pounds. So that's about 30 pounds in 10 weeks. Not too shabby. Let's see if I can't get back to my wedding weight of 190 by the end of the year. Holler.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: Breastfeeding, hustling after a newborn and interrupted mealtimes will help you lose weight. Diet? I know not of this. I eat candies by the handful some days.

11.02.2010

Big Tuesday!

Not only is it Casey Tuesday, it's Election Day (Go vote!) and BFF's birthday (Go wish her a happy one!).
And here's Casey by Numbers:
  • He is 10 weeks old today.
  • We have only 13 days left together before I return to work. His dad is back in San Diego during the week for work and that sucks more than anything.
  • For the last 2 nights he has slept through most of the night, only waking 1 time in about 8 or 9 hours. He is the most restless sleeper in the world, always throwing punches and kicks and grunting. I don't get it.
  • He's smiling more and "talking" a lot. It figures he's just now getting fun when I am no longer going to have him 24-hours a day and am about to turn him over to a babysitter.
  • He was a cow for Halloween but it was so warm, he only wore the costume for about 10 minutes. I don't think he minded.

11.01.2010

Movie Review Monday

Husband and I made it out to the theater for the second time since Casey was born to see Jackass 3D in 2D and we had the whole room to ourselves. I don't believe that a movie is enhanced by this new technology; 3D just means I have to pay extra to wear some whack glasses and walk away with a migraine. Anyway, I love the Jackass boys and have been a fan since their days on MTV about 10 years ago. I remember living with my friend Beanie at the time and she refused to watch it with me so every Sunday night I'd go into my room and laugh my ass off. A reviewer on one of Husband's podcasts summed it up quite nicely: Jackass 1 is like a high school party where kids are drunk and stupid; Jackass 2 is like a college frat party where the drunk kids are a little meaner; Jackass 3 is like the 1o-year high school reunion where everyone is just a little bit older and not sure they should be this stupid. I think it is a testament to this movie that I laughed, screamed, cringed and even dry-heaved while watching it. These guys have gray in their hair and a look of "Why are we doing this?" on their faces so it seems that this is their last venture. Way to go out with a bang.

Shutter Island. What can I say about this movie? It's two hours and eighteen minutes long. For the first two hours, I kept asking aloud "What is this movie trying to be?" Leonardo DiCaprio is a marshal who is investigating a disappearance at an institution for the criminally insane on a remote island. During his stay on the island, he has flashbacks to his time as a soldier in WWII, seeing dead bodies at Dachau. He has vivid dreams of his dead wife that were very reminiscent of Inception. None of it seems to go together but all the while there is a lot of soaring string music that is supposed to scream suspense. I was just not sure what I was watching. Then, the last eighteen minutes made it all make sense; made it worth sitting through two hours of confusion. While I can't take Leonardo DiCaprio serious when he plays a tough guy, he is a very good actor. Ben Kingsley and Mark Ruffalo are also amazing to watch. Apparently this is an adaptation of a book and I can only imagine what an interesting read it would make as the film was quite unique. However, I can't say that I would recommend this movie unless you are patient enough to wait for an epic ending.

10.31.2010

Happy Halloween!

Today I get to take Casey on a modified, daytime Trick or Treat tour, attempt my first roasting of pumpkin seeds and hand out some candy to some costumed kiddos. Hope your Halloween is as happy as I hope mine will be.

10.29.2010

Pre-Halloween Haiku Friday

Santa Ana winds
Just blew through our neighborhood
Ushered in Autumn
***
We hung lights outside
Jack O'Lanterns, big cobweb
Need to carve pumpkins
***
Casey the Moo-Cow
Will have his first trick-or-treat
Love this time of year

10.28.2010

TGTBTU

The Good
We had to take Casey for an ultrasound on Tuesday after Dr. Sally discovered that one of his testicles was a little bigger than the other. She was concerned it might be a cyst or a tumor because of its firmness but she called last night to tell us officially that it is only liquid as the ultrasound tech had predicted. We just get to wait and see if it returns to normal; no surgical intervention or urologists needed at this time. His disposition and demeanor this entire week has been stellar considering.
Also? His Halloween-themed JC Penney photo shoot. Very good. Very good indeed.

The Bad
Well, I'm awake before 6 a.m. typing this to you. And I suppose my son being and "odd ball" (Ha! Get it?) isn't exactly great. And I have to go see my urologist today. Boo to catheters!

The Ugly
The beards on the San Francisco Giants' pitching staff. And my big toes around the nail bed. They just can't quite get used to wearing shoes now after several pregnant months in flip flops.

10.27.2010

Wrap It Up Wednesday

Since I let you all in on my bloody travails, I thought I would tell you how the tale ended. As of last Thursday I was still bleeding so I decided to try and "flush" out the remainder of my problem with the little squirt bottle they gave me in the hospital when I had Casey. Nothing happened in the shower after that hot water rinse so I put on a pad and a tampon and we got on the road to Oakland. We stopped after about 2-1/2 hours of driving in Santa Maria for a potty break. When I changed my tampon, I started gushing blood. Here I was in a bathroom of three stalls and I couldn't stop bleeding. I'll spare you the grizzly details but I was in that stall for approximately 45 minutes and there was not one moment that I wasn't bleeding. Mind you, my son is outside with Husband, needing to be breastfed. Foolish new parents that we are, we didn't think we'd need formula and bottles since I had my milk jugs with us. I was soaking through tampon and pad after tampon and pad. I ended up putting one of Casey's diapers on between my chonies and jeans in addition to a tampon and a pad in order to clench my legs together like steel vices to waddle out to the Tahoe to feed him. While I was in that stall, I was on the phone with the L&D nurse at CMH. She's telling me to find my uterus, that it would feel like a softball. All I could feel was my stomach and I was thinking to myself "Why in the hell do I need to be doing this?!" All the time I'm on the phone with the nurse, there are women coming and going and washing their hands with the super loud hand dryers. I finally asked her when I should start to panic and she was telling me to get to the ER if I went through a pad in one hour, when I passed a clot the size of a mother lovin' softball, the second over the course of this crazy bathroom stop. After that? NOTHING. The bleeding has stopped. Just as abruptly as this tale of horrors.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: Never stop in a Santa Maria Chevron unless you're ready for bloodshed.

10.26.2010

Casey Tuesday


  • Casey is 9 weeks old today
  • He was 2 months old on Sunday the 24th
  • Yesterday he weighed in at 12 pounds, 12 ounces
  • He is 24" long
  • He had 4 vaccines yesterday: 1 oral, 2 on the left leg and 1 on the right
  • He scream cried for about 30 minutes when he woke up from his nap because he was so very sad, hurt and scared. This is the first time I've seen actual tears spring from his eyes.
  • His left testicle was swollen so we had to go for an ultrasound this morning. Turns out it's fluid but he may have to go to a urologist to get it drained. Thank God it wasn't a tumor or a cyst. He peed 2 times during the process.
  • Over the 3-day weekend we had a 15-hour round trip drive to and from Oakland where we got to hang out with many friends, 2 other babies and a fetus.
  • He got to experience his very 1st night in a hotel and about 5 diaper changes in the back of the Tahoe where the breeze could blow on his undercarriage. He loves that.

10.22.2010

Oakland-bound Haiku Friday

Baby's first road trip
A five-hour drive to the bay
Rain, rain stay away
***
Friday through Sunday
A "practice run" of travel
Prep us for others
***
I can't wait to see
BFF, Sasha and Babe
And other homies

10.21.2010

TGTBTU

The Good:
I work until noon today and then not again until either November 8th or 15th. I have to get my first "bonding' check to figure out that date... I'm very simple. Also good? Getting out of town tomorrow for the weekend. It's been too long since I've been to the bay and since my last visit with BFF. We were both preggers for goodness sake! Now we have wee ones to share!

The Bad:
I'm still rockin' a pad and I'm totally fucking over it EIGHT WEEKS AND TWO DAYS LATER. The tampon might be overkill but it's better safe than sorry I guess. This is really getting in the way of my sex life and I am not having it.

The Ugly:
Currently, the weather takes this title. It's gray and rainy. While I do love this weather, we would like to take Casey to the pumpkin patch today and it will definitely be muddy. Plus, we have a 5-hour drive tomorrow and I'd prefer the roads be dry, thankyouverymuch.

10.20.2010

Helping Hand

When I got pregnant, I told my employers pretty much immediately. Hell, I took the pregnancy test in the bathroom here at work and bee-lined from there to my boss's office to tell him. I think I was about 6-weeks at the time. It was the soonest possible moment for the test to detect I was pregnant. Anyway, they had plenty of time to get a replacement for my maternity leave yet decided to procrastinate. My replacement didn't come to start training until 3 weeks before my due date and I left 2 weeks after his arrival. My replacement happens to be my boss's son. I am one of the bosses' daughter so I don't really feel too much nepotism going on here, it's just sort of a family business with loyal employees that have been around for decades.
However, my boss decided that he was going to send his son to China to meet one of our suppliers and take a tour of the plant they have out there. Mind you, I am not due back to work until mid-November. He was sent to China mid-October. I decided to help out so I've been here for about 4 hours a day since last Thursday. What kills me is that his son left quite a mess for me (basically the result of inexperience) and I'm busting my butt trying to clean it all up before I really return. Every time I ask my boss a question about something, he cops a 'tude and says "I already gave this to D." Um, I'm trying to help him out and I don't need the lip. What also chaps my ass is that I've worked here for four and a half years and no one ever once invited me to China. And I'm working when I should be home playing with my nearly two-month old. I guess the bright side is that while I'm not getting paid - lest it interfere with my maternity leave benefits - I am working off a deficit of vacation hours. So at least there's that.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: In the words of the late, great Rodney Dangerfield, "I get no respect."

10.19.2010

Casey Tuesday

Casey is 8 weeks old today. He is looking much less like an alien and that really pleases me. I'm not sure where he got those blue eyes but they don't seem to be going anywhere. His hair is almost reddish in the sunlight and neither of those qualities are from his mother. I'm not entirely convinced he's mine but he's definitely his father's son. We know this because of the dimple in his chin. He's doing much better at sleeping through the night. Let me rephrase that. He sleeps for about 7 hours at a time but when he goes to bed at 8, that means he is up at 3. Then he's usually awake for about 2 hours. This makes it a little difficult for the rest of the household who would really like to sleep during the wee dark hours of the morning. This weekend, we will be taking him on his first road trip up to the Bay area where we will hammer out the details of his arranged marriage to BFF's daughter, Sasha, whom he will be meeting for the first time. Not too much has happened developmentally but he is getting very vocal and it makes me laugh. He also kicks all the time and smacks the dangling toys on his play mat that resembles a caterpillar. In the middle of the night when I'm changing his diaper, he smiles at the Eeyore that hangs above his changing table and it melts my heart every time. My son. Tee!

10.18.2010

Methergine Monday

So... I've mentioned "the bleeding" here a couple times. About 48 hours after Casey was born I had an episode of bleeding that was pretty epic. I woke up and it looked like someone had cut off the lower half my body. I'm talking horror story proportions of blood. It was awful. I was put on Methergine to help with the clotting and such. Since then, I had been consistently bleeding for seven weeks. Last week I had two episodes of bleeding that were just ridiculous. I'm ok with a period-like flow but I don't need to be gushing onto the floor and through my clothing. So the doctor put me on a second round of Methergine and I hoped for the best. Tomorrow is eight weeks postpartum and I am still bleeding so I said to hell with it and called the doctor. They insisted I come in for an ultrasound and I obeyed. There was a spot that the technician identified as a clot.
The doctor happened to be out delivering a baby so the nurse practitioner came to talk to us. This is the same nurse practitioner that said she thought the doctor would want to induce me because of the high blood pressure I had while I was pregnant. He didn't induce me. Today, she said the doctor would probably want to do a D&C so I left the office super distressed because I didn't want another damn procedure done that I'd have to heal from. I also didn't want to be put under anesthesia or have to cancel my trip to Oakland to see BFF & Co. this weekend. Basically, I just wanted to stop bleeding already.
Well, fool us twice for believing the nurse practitioner of doom and gloom and worse case scenarios. The doctor called and said that it was basically a three-centimeter clot that will eventually pass on its own and until then I just get to be inconvenienced. He didn't want to do a D&C and I didn't want him to. It was a win, win situation. However, I still get to bleed until the damn thing decides it no longer wants to take up residence in my uterus. So in case there are any other new moms that are still bleeding eight weeks (we're talking almost two months, people!) after childbirth, hopefully Google will lead you here and you won't be terrified that you're hemorrhaging. Bleeding should stop after six weeks. If it doesn't, talk to your doctor.

10.15.2010

Mid-October Haiku Friday

Casey slept poorly
Husband's here but off to work
I woke up bloody
***
I'm back to work, too
Thanks to Bossman's poor choices
Such a crappy week
***
HLP visit
Something to look forward to
A high amongst lows

10.14.2010

The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

The Good:
Casey slept from 9 to 4 last night and Husband is coming back home today instead of tomorrow.

The Bad:
My maternity leave replacement got sent to China so I'm sort of secretly back at work, half day from today until next Thursday.

The Ugly:
Getting ready for work and getting spit up on with no time to change.

10.13.2010

Dog Etiquette

  • You telling me that your dog is a "rescue" does not excuse its bad behavior.
  • Some dogs? Don't deserve to be rescued. They're not people. Some are just inherently bad. I don't care what Cesar Milan tells you.
  • If you have a dog you can't control while it is on a leash, don't take it on a walk.
  • Tiny dogs yap incessantly. Buying another tiny dog does not keep the other tiny dog from yapping, they do so in unison. While you're at work. All day long.
  • Your dog isn't "terrified" after being attacked, you are. The dog senses your mood and responds accordingly.
  • A dog in a stroller? Really?
  • Pick up your dog's shit when you're on a walk. They sell wee rolls of bags that go right on the leash. If you don't, pick up your asshole sign at the nearest exit and wear it proudly.
MORAL OF THIS STORY: I have a well-behaved dog.

10.12.2010

Casey Tuesday

Casey is 7-weeks old today. Today is also Day 1 of his dad being back down in San Diego for the week for work so I will be a single mother for 3 whole days and most of Friday. Hopefully that will be easier than it sounds. He has had a couple nights this past week where he has slept a full 8 hours that were simply bliss but mostly he is up every 3. We think he has been going through a growth spurt because if there isn't a boob in his mouth or he isn't asleep, he is a fussy crybaby. Thank goodness he is so cute because those times are pretty trying. The other night when we were putting him in his pajamas he was screeching like a brand new baby and it was just like nails on a chalkboard. Apparently for the exactly 7-week anniversary of his arrival into this world, my body wanted to relive the blood loss I experienced that day at 1 o'clock this morning. Such a pleasure. I will be calling the doctor if this shit doesn't stop soon. But enough about me. In other Casey developments, he has discovered sucking his hand in the most graphic sounding way possible and his poops have been pretty much limited to one epic deuce a day. He is a chatty little man with lots to say and every now and then we are lucky enough to milk a smile out of him. I can't wait until those are a bit more sincere and in response to something other than gas.

10.11.2010

Monday Schnippets

  • Husband is off today because of Columbus and that is the only reason I will acknowledge today as a holiday. Discover my ass.
  • Tomorrow, he goes to San Diego for the week. This means it'll just be me and Casey, 24 hours a day until he returns on Friday evening. Pray for me.
  • I have been bleeding for close to 7 weeks and am ready to hang myself. TMI? Maybe. But that's the way it is here.
  • In addition to the bleeding there is cramping. I have resorted to 800 mg of Ibuprofen and 440 mg of Aleve at a time to help with this problem. Does that make me a pill popper? If so, so be it.
  • Did I mention Casey is going through a growth spurt? This means if he isn't sleeping or eating, he is fussing or crying. Awesome doesn't even begin to describe it.
  • We watched Death at a Funeral over the weekend. Here's a two-word review: Um, no.
  • And finally, something that warrants more than a bullet point on a list: The gay hate crime in the Bronx. What the fuck is wrong with people? How do you have that much hate in your heart in your late teens? Why is there always a fucking plunger involved? When is this shit going to stop already? Gay people are sinners? Take a look at these fucking gang banging wannabe pieces of shit. If it was up to me I'd shoot them all dead. Ignorant assholes. Someone needs to slap their parents and then kick all of their asses. I have never once met a hostile homosexual and have never once felt intimidated or threatened by one. Everyone needs to leave them the hell alone. Amen.

10.08.2010

Sleep Haiku Friday

My little Casey
Slept from 9:30 to 5
That's almost 8 hours
***
After some boob time
He was back down for the count
Asleep again, yo!
***
So two hours later
He still hasn't woken up
I can't be more pleased

10.07.2010

Inspired by BFF

The Good:
The concert we went to last night. Not only did Maroon 5 prove themselves to be quite the live entertainment, but One Republic proved to us they weren't just emo one-hit wonders. Also? I managed to get a solid buzz on after a mere 2 beers in a row. Solid. And? It didn't rain a drop!

The Bad:
Apparently my son's nighttime behavior wasn't quite what Grandma had expected when she agreed to watch Casey last night while Husband and I went on our first real date since he was born. He had a 4-hour stretch of crying and general shenanigans... basically what his dad and I get to deal with pretty much every day.

The Ugly:
Some of the newborns we've seen pictures of lately. Lord almighty.
Also? How engorged one's boobs can get after 6 hours away from one's baby and 3 beers. Ha!

10.06.2010

Rain, Rain Go Away

Tonight we have tickets to see Maroon 5 at the Santa Barbara Bowl. On the tickets it says "Rain or Shine." It is an outdoor venue. It has been raining for days but it has stopped for the time being. There is a 30% chance of showers early this evening. The show starts at 6. Looks like we're going to have to break out the raincoats, galoshes and umbrellas, people. Please cross your fingers for us.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: It really does rain in Southern California.

10.05.2010

Happy Birthday, Husband

I would like to take this opportunity to wish my husband/baby daddy a very happy 36th birthday. While we may have gone from husband and wife to parents and we're still adjusting to this transition, you are and always will be the love of my life. Every time I see you with our son, my heart just swells with love and pride. You took to being a dad like a fish takes to water, like it was second nature to you, like it was what you were born to do. I look forward to celebrating your birthday with you for many years to come and I vow to you, here and now, that I will eventually make you an angel food cake with butter cream frosting for your birthday... just not with a 6-week old hindering my attempts. I LOVE YOU, PAPABEAR!
Love,
Mamabear

Casey Tuesday

My son is 6 weeks old today. What a milestone. He's cooing and seems to be perfecting the art of being all-around adorable. He has also gone from hardly crying at all to crying like it is his job. There are days when I can't figure out if he wants to be up or down, eating or sleeping... it's like he's a little puzzle. Man, talk about eating. I'm pretty sure my boobies are no longer a part of me, just an extension of his mouth. Luckily, he is sleeping longer periods of time in the night so I'm not walking around like some drunken, sleep-deprived zombie. He has already outgrown his newborn clothes and has moved on to the onesies that are for 3-month old babies. He holds his head up during tummy time and I swear we are close to a roll-over. He loves to curl his fingers around his hair and ball them into a little fist and pull those lovely locks until he cries. Silly Casey. I just can't love him any more than I do. Check out that chin dimple. I mean really.

10.01.2010

Hello, October Haiku Friday

Autumn has arrived
Even the air smells different
The weather crisper
***
Halloween this month
First trick or treat for Casey,
Pumpkin patch visit
***
I sure love this month
And can't wait to decorate
Hooray for spooky

9.30.2010

We Have HBO Now

Since Casey's arrival, we spend more time at home so we spend more time in the house in front of the boob tube than I am really comfortable admitting. I decided to pay $8 a month extra for HBO since they play way better movies than we are getting for free on Showtime and The Movie Channel. Plus we really like Eastbound & Down because it is absolutely hilarious. This is too much information, I'm sure, but I'm basically setting things up so you understand how I got sucked into a movie I never would have watched otherwise: Changeling starring Angelina Jolie and the undeniable John Malkovich. This is also a Clint Eastwood film and I really consider him a fine filmmaker. Did you know Changeling is based on true events that occurred in Los Angeles in the late 1920s? I didn't but I can assure you that said events blew my mind and totally upset me. Jolie's son is abducted and the LAPD tries to play off another kid as hers months later. She obviously knows the boy isn't her son and when she tries to say as much, she ends up thrown in a lunatic asylum. Say what?! I was absolutely outraged and got way too emotionally invested in this tragic tale of police corruption. I don't know that I recommend the movie, per se, but I will say that it will stun you that something like this actually happened in real life. And at the risk of sounding catty, Angelina Jolie is not easy on the eyes. She needs to gain about 50 pounds and get her lips out of my face. Love, Randi.

9.29.2010

Another Baby Book. Shocking.

When my hairdresser found out I was pregnant she loaned me a birthing book (that I never did read) and Baby Laughs: The Naked Truth About the First Year of Motherhood by Jenny McCarthy. I figured since my child is now a month old, I should probably read it and return those books so she could loan them to her next preggo friend. I read McCarthy's other book, Belly Laughs, and had some nice things to say about it. This time around, I didn't laugh as much because frankly I didn't think she was as amusing or funny. Basically it was a reiteration of what I just read in the book I reviewed last week and it's entirely possible that I am on baby overload right now.
Luckily, this was an easy read and I could peruse it sporadically on the toilet or while I was breastfeeding in the middle of the night. The chapters are only a few pages along so it's not like it was required deep concentration or attention. I think most new moms will basically tell you the same things: you lose interest in sex, your body will never be the same, you will be tired and babies are 24/7. I know I told you last week to read the books your girlfriends give you but maybe not this one. Though I will say this for my hairdresser, she is a genuinely wonderful person who knows more about me than most other women in my life and I don't know what I'd do with out her.

MORAL OF THAT STORY: I need to dive into some juicy fiction. STAT!

9.28.2010

Casey Tuesday

  • Casey is 5 weeks old today.
  • On his 1 month checkup, he weighed in at 10 lbs, 8 oz (69%), measured 22" long (68%) and his head is 15" (47%) around.
  • We took 1 month portraits at JC Penney's and it took 2 hours.
  • During that time he had 2 costume changes, 3 quasi-feedings, and 2 diaper changes.
  • I cried 1 time because I, and Casey, were overstimulated after dropping Kiyah off at the groomer (who was 15 minutes late), a pediatrician visit and the photo shoot from hell.
  • 3 things before 3 pm is too much with a newborn.
  • His dad has 2 whole weeks off of work to play with him!

9.27.2010

Netflix Movie Review Monday

Since we didn't make it out the door to the movies this weekend (come on now, 2 weeks in a row with a newborn? Ha!) I will review two Netflix movies. First on the list is 9. When I saw the previews for this one last year I thought it looked really neat. I love animation and there are a ton of well-known actors that provided the voices so I thought it would be a fun rental. I was wrong. This one was straight sci-fi and basically revolves around Armageddon. This doctor created a machine that ended up turning on humans and causing the end of the world. The same doctor, trying to make up for his epic fail, created these little guys who in turn will rebuild humanity. There's a super religious theme at the end but mostly this whole film revolved around these weird little potato sack creatures running. Not exactly my idea of an uplifting good time.

Second on the list is Grizzly Man. You may have heard about this one. It's about a guy named Timothy Treadwell who was basically obsessed with bears and lived among them in the Alaska wild for something like 13 summers. He was one delusional son of a bitch who was convinced that he was protecting these huge grizzlies from poachers even though they lived on a preserve and really were in no danger from what I could see. This guy reminded me of a potential she-male with a penchant for filming himself and after about the first 15 minutes started really getting on my nerves. He certainly didn't come across as sane at any point in this documentary though I do believe he had good intentions. He'd study the bears and do educational visits for schoolchildren, free of charge. The other folks that were interviewed also sort of seemed one card short of a full deck and I wondered where they found these people! In summary, (Spoiler Alert!) Treadwell and his girlfriend ended up being eaten by a grizzly bear while camping out in its territory, something that was basically forbidden by federal law. Isn't it ironic? And maybe just a little bit predictable?