Saddest Story Ever Told

Yesterday my ma and I went to our hairdresser's baby shower. We walked in and the room looked like it had been coated in Pepto Bismol... a little girl is on her way into the world. So of course we played games. Counted the skittles in the bottle. Tore the outline of a baby out of a piece of paper - behind our backs. That sort of thing. Then, out came the rolls of toilet paper.
Last time I played a game with toilet paper was when we used it to dress Ang in a TP wedding gown at BFF's bridal shower. This game had us pulling off enough toilet paper to wrap around the pregger belly. I tore ten sheets of paper because our hairdresser is a wee little thing. A petite flower. She's about 5'2" and a buck twenty five soaking wet when she isn't with child. But when I held those ten sheets up, it didn't look like much. So what did I do? I wrapped those ten sheets around my own waist.
Perfect fit.
Oh well. I guess I wouldn't be winning that game just like I hadn't won the other two.
Or so I thought.
Turns out, ten sheets was the winning number.
However, I didn't feel like a winner. I just felt like a barren woman who has the same waistline measurements as a woman due to give birth in less than two months.
And so we left the shower. Immediately.
The End


Coodence said...

Dude. Sucks.

Let's get knocked up already.

Andrea said...

Dude. You're 5 inches taller than her with curves. AND? You said she's tineh in her non-pregnant state. So...stop it.

Sheen V said...

Yeah, really, you look great!

Sassy One said...

I'm not even going to tell you how many sheets they needed to get around me!

You are hotness.

Sassy One said...

Dude..I just went to the bathroom and measured myself with TP (yeah I'm that cool) and I am a solid 10 sheets myself.

So there.

Buzz said...

What everyone else said.

The. Hottness.


Lisa..... said...

You are hot. So there.
I did myself. 9 sheets.

Andrea said...

I did myself, too. Still need to figure out how many sheets it takes to wrap around me, though. hee

hotdrwife said...

I just did myself. 9 1/2 sheets.

So there.

And when I was a few months from having my son? Yeah. That's a whole 'nother big.

I bet it took a whole roll of Charmin. No lie.

fyrchk said...

I'm not gonna lie. I'm not going to do the toilet paper test. Only because I know I'll be depressed when I find out how many sheets it does take.

Soooo....there's that. :)