Ready For St. Nick Haiku Friday

The stockings are hung
My Christmas cards have been mailed
Decorations up
I'm finished shopping
Never stepped foot in a mall
Thank you, Amazon
Now I can enjoy
Listening to the carols
Looking at the lights

And now for a bonus, the top 10 weirdest searches that will lead you here:
  1. Animal Vagina
  2. Arab Women Smelly Vaginas
  3. "Going in my pants"
  4. Burnt Armpits
  5. Happy Poo Dodger Game
  6. Lesbian Faeces (who spells "feces" like this?)
  7. List of names given to the ways in which you pass faeces in relation to the shit list (I did not make that up.)
  8. Secret Vibrator Hiding Places
  9. Urge to poo during my period
  10. Whale vag

There are also A LOT of boob searches yet nary a boob to be found here but me.


Sassy One said...

So really anything to do with vagina or poo might lead one here?


Randi said...

Don't forget the boobs!

ceedee said...

faeces is the british way of saying feces.
I am just a plethora of knowledge :)

Itchy said...

My head really hurts
Stupid long phone meeting calls
I'd rather see boobs

exile said...

it begs the question...
where do you hide your vib?
just spill it randi

hotdrwife said...

I laugh every time I look at statcounter and see what people have searched for, and how they find me.

But I believe this list might just take the cake, woman. Er, whale vag? Nay, faeces.