7.11.2007

Blessing & A Curse

Lately I've been having a bit of a love/hate relationship with the world wide web. I embrace it for the knowledge it allows me to have right at my fingertips, yet I curse it for being such a huge and vital part of my existence. To imagine, the internet has really only been around for about 10 years, right? I chose to virtually document almost everything I do online for years by way of Friendster, MySpace and, last but not least, Blogger. Recently, I deleted my Friendster profile because it has, in my life at least, become obsolete thanks to MySpace (thanks, JJ). I've mentioned my unjustified obsession with that social networking site so I shan't reiterate it here. If it wasn't for e-mail, I wouldn't be able to keep in constant contact with friends and relatives, yet I find myself compulsively clicking refresh throughout the day and am a bit disappointed when there is no "new" mail. If it wasn't for Blogger, I wouldn't have met some amazing people I would have otherwise never met, yet where are my comments? My traffic? Classmates.com assisted me in organizing my 10-year high school reunion, yet it also brought up a lot of old shit I could have done without. Same with MySpace. It's a double-edged sword and frankly I'm not sure how I feel about it. I love that I'm back in touch with people I "grew up" with but at what cost? Will I later regret that I've posted so much personal information online? Is the past better left there? These are things I've been pondering lately but it really came to a head over the last couple of days. A certain blogger is going through some hard times with her sig-other. Her blog is her space to vent, yet he lacks an outlet and has been posting comments about their situation on other blogs to tell his side of the story. When does one's private life need to remain private? Is the blog really just an outlet for one's self or is there more to it? On a totally unrelated but somewhat related note, I am getting my tonsils out. On one hand I got to research everything associated with my tonsil issues that allowed me to "self-diagnose." On the other hand, my research also led me to one man's photo blog documentation of his post-op recovery. Did I really need to see that? To scare myself prior to surgery? Really? Do you all see where I'm coming from here? Do you ever feel this way? I am in no way judging anyone for leading their lives online as I do it myself, I just wonder if I'm alone in feeling this way. And I'm sure the things I've said above can be misconstrued when it comes to people from my past and the blogger I referred to, but I'm in no way trying to be negative or hurtful. Mostly just sorting things out...
Sorry for all the questions. Thanks for reading.

6 comments:

Jessica said...

I have a love-hate relationship with MySpace. I was told just this morning, by a non-MySpace friend that I needed to give it up, but I don't think I will.

Buzz said...

I'm fairly certain that the personal stuff that is talked about on blogs and what-not can be counterproductive. Especially when shots are being taken at other people through third party blogs and what-not. There is an avenue of anonymity though, one that's easier to put in place than folks think. If an individual wants to keep a blog that only certain people can read, then they have the choice to go private. Same with Myspace. I guess people need to take some personal accountability and make adjustments based on their comfort level. I for one censor my blog to a degree when I need to, or I just don't discuss really personal things in comments or on blogs.

However, I feel like I've met some really cool folks (you included) through this medium and for that I'm thankful.

-buzz

David's Traveling said...

the web commercialized itself starting around '95, but was around several years earlier... the internet itself started in '69... we (hopefully) will never go back to a time that information is a privilege of a tiny minority...

having said that, it seems that everything, good and bad, is found, unedited and raw on the net... I found out long ago not to look for things that you don't want to find, because it is there, and you don't want to see it...

i think the same goes for posting stuff... it is like a tattoo... once posted, it is there forever... a massive tattoo on your back saying 'fu** you' might seem like a cool idea as a teenager, but what about when you are 30?

Itchy said...

Hassles are everywhere. They've always existed. Sure the Internet makes hassles a bit easier to access, like your high school reunion drama, but chances are you'd have heard about it anyway. Hassles find you.

Now, I don't know the issue with your friends and the divorce but putting things in writing in a public forum could come back and squarely bite them on their asses during the proceedings. Sure, we all need an outlet. Some of us don't have cool co-workers that can be that for us or family and friends close by so we've gone to the 'net. But there still needs to be a bit of "mystery" to the openness you provide. Not reveal it all, in public.

I talk about a lot of personal stuff, but I try to keep it vague. Vague enough that my ass will not be bitten later on. And if I decide that I need to open up more, email exists. IM exists.

So while I feel you on the obsessive email checking and all that, I remember that I was the same way with mail. If I didn't have email to keep in touch with everyone and had to do the "pen pal" thing of old I'd be standing next to the mailbox everyday waiting for the mail person to show up. Because that's just me.

Not sure if I even made a point here...

Shora said...

Love / hate for sure. I had a Facebook id, deleted, re-created, deleted. Blog, deleted, re-created, deleted. Should I post pics of myself? Yes, no, yes, no. Am I freakin' female or what?

But when all is said and done, I have NO IDEA what I did before the Internet.

JJ said...

I used to post much more often. And I used to leave comments on other's blogs much more often. I felt like I was really interacting with people and it mattered to me.

I really don't know what changed. I'm still into Myspace I guess. And I post on my blog whenever something important happens or if I think of something funny. But I don't seek out readership like I used to. I don't use Blex or BlogMad anymore.

Maybe it's because I'm busy (I am), or maybe it's because I suddenly sort of care about my job and want to fuck off less at work.

I still can't imagine daily life without this outlet. It's just not as big a part of my life as it used to be.

Is this even related to what your post was about? I can't remember.