Blades of Glory

Picture this. Oxnard. 2007. Opening night of Blades of Glory. I am thankful I had the foresight to buy tickets in advance. The theater is swarming with teenagers. The lights go down. The movie begins.
But first? After Talladega Nights I was concerned that perhaps my love of all things Will Ferrell was coming to an end. I was so excited and filled with anticipation for that to come out and when I finally saw it I was at best disappointed. Let down. Is this what it had come to? Will Ferrell was some kind of a cliche all of a sudden? It was a sad day for me.
I tried not to get so excited about Blades. I didn't want to feel that pain again. Somehow, I couldn't contain my excitement though. Pam from The Office was in the cast. How could things go wrong?
Luckily for me they didn't. I laughed so hard watching this movie I think I missed some parts. There are many moments that could perhaps be misconstrued as making fun of homosexuals, this is figure skating after all. This movie is exactly what I wanted Talladega to be. Utterly ridiculous hilarity. Chazz Michael Michaels is Will Ferrell as Ron Burgundy, Neil Diamond and virtually all of the other characters I've ever seen him inhabit all wrapped up in one hilarious, hairy, ball of a man.
Scenes to watch out for? John Heder and Jenna Fischer smooching. Will Ferrell's opening skate routine... ok seriously? Just watch the movie. If you're disappointed I'm thisclose to saying I'll refund your money.


Haiku FriDay 12

Yay Blades of Glory!Jenna Fischer not as PamMy man Will Ferrell
Test me already!***12 days of bullshit dietBetter be worth it
Week started out roughWorked through my PMS angstI need some Prozac
***Just found out that what was supposed to be 14 days turned into 17 or more because I took a dumb Allegra this morning and now have to wait to get that out of my stupid system before they can do the stupid test on Thursday, April 5th. Sigh. That means no eggs, tomatoes, citrus fruits, wheat, chocolate... I better lose some more weight.

New Maroon 5


Love ThursDay 11

Time to move down that bad ju-ju from the beginning of the week...

1112 045
It seems like only yesterday that I was rushing to the hospital to wait for the arrival of my brother's first child. Because I had such a great relationship with my uncle growing up, the idea of becoming an aunt was simply the coolest thing thing sliced bread... not that I have any inkling how sliced bread can even compare to being an auntie... it just sounded like the right thing to say just then... Anyway, when he came I could not stop the tears of joy from pouring down my cheeks. Here was this tiny baby that I'd fallen in love with pretty much right after he was conceived. After 9 long months of belly rubbing and anticipation here he was and he was perfect. Here we are 5 and a half months later and it's simply too good to be true. That little guy gives me the biggest smiles I've ever gotten in my life every time I see him, as if to say "Yes! My auntie's here!" and that smile is no less than contagious. Last night I went to bring him a Muppet CD and just being in his presence washed away all of the anxiety and sadness of the last week. Thank God for my little angel. He has no idea how much he "saves" me.

grandparents 044

And? Please feel free to weigh in on how great I look in the first picture with my pink and white manicure and closely cropped blondish hair. I'm marvelling at it myself.


Happy Hump Day 10

A long time ago I read a book called The Four Agreements. Since then I've recommended it to several people and for a while had it taped to my wall. How quickly I forget them, though, when I find myself crying over something someone has said to me. Eli, ever my champion, always tells me to not take things personally but I always do. In regards to yesterday's pity party, it turns out, my brother was snapping at me on the phone because he was watching a movie and about 5 other people had called before that. Not only that, he may be on the verge of losing his job. I don't usually ask this of my religious readers out there but if you could keep him and his family in your prayers it would be much appreciated.
On top of that, my boss told me in a few choice words that I'm not being very nice to him lately. He's right and I'm going to make a concerted effort to watch my mouth. Here I am worried about how everyone is being mean to me and I'm probably doing the same thing to someone else. This sailor mouth of mine is simply not cute any more and the bitch act is totally stale. I'm a nice person! Honest! I'm just menstrual and craving delicious sweets! I just need to be more impeccable with my word.
The reason my ma and I got into it on Saturday was that I made the assumption when my dad got tickets for a Dodger game on Mother's Day she'd be happy to go. We have a tradition in my family that's been going on for as long as I can remember that we go to a Dodger game on or around my birthday. This time it just so happened my birthday is on the Saturday before Mother's Day. Basically? She doesn't want to spend Mother's Day away from her mother or at a game. Due to my assumption there is now tension and original plans I had to have a birthday party at her house are for the time being sort of ruined.
Finally, I have simply not been doing my best when it comes to certain aspects of my life. Just yesterday, BFF chastised me for saying negative things about my appearance. I've also not been finishing my school assignments and exercise is practically non-existent now that school's back in session. However, I have been doing my best on this diet. It's day 10 of 14. This morning I found that I have at least an inch to spare on the waistline of my jeans. Now that I'm seeing results I have a feeling it will take the edge off a bit.
So that's all the news that's fit to print. Have a happy hump day!


Pity Party, Table of One

Sometimes it is impossible to keep my moods out of these posts. For this I apologize. Yesterday I was talking to a few of my coworkers and they had gotten into confrontations with their loved ones over the weekend. I, too, had my own little row with my mother that I will chalk up to too much time together in my dad's absence during my spring break. I figured that there must be something in the air. Then last night my brother and I got into a bit of a quick spat and it pushed me over the edge. Probably the combination of these family feuds, this dumb diet and a lethal case of PMS led me to break down in tears. Quite frankly, that ain't right.
Because I am on the cusp of 30, single and without children, I feel like I don't quite fit in with the rest of the family. It may sound silly but I often feel like a 7th wheel. There's my mom and dad, my grandparents, and then my brother and his girlfriend. And all of us live within a 5-mile radius so we're always together. The only other person that used to balance this feeling was my uncle but he took a beau and moved to San Francisco and rarely joins us for holidays anymore. I suppose little Ethan could be my partner in crime now but he's sort of the center of attention so it's not like he and I are going to the side and chatting it up, ya know?
Anyway, I just wonder how much different thing would be if I had a significant other and/or maybe a child of my own. Would I still feel like some kind of black sheep in my own family? And how do I fix this feeling? Do I do like my uncle and simply not show up to family functions? Do I get knocked up? Does anyone else feel like this? Sigh. I'm in a couple weeks all of this will have blown over but right now it's giving me a heavy heart and I just had to get it off my chest. Thanks for listening. Reading.


7 Down, 7 To Go

Well, it's official. I survived a week of starvation. Oh, if only that were true. I'm by no means starving. You would think that I would be a shadow of my former self considering I've become some sort of health fanatic but I think the truth of the matter is I am simply eating more health food to make up for the lack of goodies. Does that make sense? So while I may not be eating candy or fast food or any of the finer things in life, I'm still making sure I eat enough rice cakes and jelly that I won't go hungry. I hopped on the scale at my parents' house this weekend and if it is to be believed, I maybe lost 2-3 pounds last week. Not too shabby.
Big differences I've noticed in a week of this diet, if you care to know, are:

  • I'm in the bathroom a whole lot these days. That's all I'll say about that.
  • My fridge looks like a grown-up's fridge chock full of veggies and meat.
  • I make my meals rather than buy them.
  • Health food is much more costly than regular food so even though I'm making more meals myself, I'm still spending about the same amount of money.
  • My tummy no longer resembles Buddha. Methinks it's the lack of wheat.
  • One glass of wine can knock me on my ass now.
  • I've not felt "stuffed" once. Nor full. Not hungry, though, just not particularly satisfied.

Also? Yesterday I went on a hike and found that while I had a lot of energy, by the end of the trail I was about ready to crash. Like I was a bit shaky and simply spent. But that could have just been the bright sun at high noon. 90 minutes on the trail, followed by a healthy salad for lunch, a delightful bubble bath, an hour-long nap and then the rest of my Sunday afternoon spent lying on my couch in front of the boob tube. A great day all the way around.


Party Pictures

Rather than bombard you with a zillion pics of Ethan I just threw them on Flickr but here are a couple that aren't there yet are still pretty stinkin' cute:
Great Grandparents
Ethan's Weather Pattern
Sign of the upcoming apocalypse
Three Generations


I Am An Asshole

Friday, March 23rd was my grandparents' 82nd birthday. Not only were they born on the same day of the same year, they also share the same anniversary. Neat, huh? God I hope sarcasm reads well. Happy belated blog birthday wishes to Granules and Grampa.

DVD Recommendation

It is rare that I will watch a movie on DVD and feel the need to tell people to rush out and see it. Even now, I'm questioning whether I really want to recommend Stranger than Fiction or not... Quite frankly, it might make me a little bit sad or disappointed if you didn't love it the same way I did. I'm actually disappointed I didn't catch this one in the theater and mid-viewing I grabbed my laptop to add it to my amazon wish list. I might even go so far as to say I would actually consider going to Best Buy right this very second to add it to my personal library.
The first thing words that come to my mind to describe this movie are: original, subtle and romantic. The Will Ferrell of Anchorman and Old School is no where to be found here. Instead, he's a creature of habit and solitude who has his life shaken up by a narrator in his head, played by Emma Thompson. Maggie Gyllenhaal plays his love interest and I can say with certainty I adore her just about as much as I lust after her brother. She had me at Secretary. There's also a bit part for Tony Hale who I will never be able to see as anyone other than Buster Bluth on Arrested Development yet still dig immensely. Queen Latifah and Dustin Hoffman are also awesome as an assistant and a professor respectively.
I laughed. I cried. That's all I care to divulge at this juncture. Either way, give it a shot. You might like it, too.


Still Starving Haiku Friday

White jeans on today
Spring is definitely here
Baby blue shoes, top
Diet on day five
Not feeling homicidal
That's a good thing, right?
Went out to the bar
Couldn't drink any brewskies
Talk about weird, man



I'm wondering how I'm going to devote an entire post to this movie. What is there to say, after all? Adapted from Frank Miller's graphic novel, the same brilliant mind that gave us Sin City, 300 is about a battle between some Greeks and Persians. If you want to learn more about it go ahead and Google that shit because I'm not here to give you a history lesson. Hell, I am hardly able to give you a decent movie review. 300 might as well have been made in Wisconsin, it is that cheesy. While visually appealing, the special effects and CGI stay very true to comic book form, the dialogue is simply tragic. If I'm not mistaken, Leonidus is rockin' a pretty thick Scottish brogue that doesn't seem very Greek to me. There are a few boobie shots for the horny teens and the battles are pretty impressive, regardless of how unrealistic they are. At one point thousands of Persian arrows are raining down on the Greek army of 300 men and not one of them gets hit. I'll suspend belief to a certain degree but I just wasn't buying that. All in all it was a good way to kill a couple hours and I'm grateful I had free passes. How on earth this became the third highest grossing R-rated movie is beyond me though. The people must be thirsty for blood and to quote Leonidus, "Spartans! Enjoy your breakfast, for tonight we dine in Hell!"


Welcome, Spring!

I would think that the advent of Spring would bring nothing but smiles to my face. Rather, I woke up to my reflection in the mirror showing an abnormally swollen upper lip and puffy red cheeks. Seems as though I am having an allergic reaction. Interestingly enough, it was my understanding that this diet I'm on was to eliminate allergies, not introduce them. I'm at the point of considering quitting and it's only the start of Day 3. Or is it? Yesterday I realized that not only was my breakfast tainted with corn syrup but my salad dressing has wheat in it. Go figure. The first two days were practically all for naught.
And riddle me this, won't you? How come "health food" has way more calories than my regular food? For instance, this morning's new organic rice flakes with none of the things I am not supposed to have as ingredients has 170 calories per serving whereas my Special K has about 110...
But you don't care about all that. Why would you? I bet you're enjoying all of the little things I'm not. All the little things that brought me joy like flavored coffee creamer and tiny 100 calorie Chips Ahoy snack packs. Or a nice diet ice cream sando after dinner. Or a frosty beer after a hard day at work.
On a happier note I made it to the gym again last night. Two days in a row and the gym bag is in the car for a third. My thighs are rejoicing and my calves are taut with happiness. That familiar trickle of sweat that works its way from my arm crease to my elbow showed its pretty little self again to me last night as I jogged for 20 minutes. Not 15 like the night before. No, sir. Kicked it up a notch. Hot trainer Perry stopped by to say hi and told me he's a proud papa now. Has it really been that long since I worked out? Jesus. I should be ashamed. But there's no sense crying over yesterday. I'm there now and that's half the battle.
Happy Hump Day! Dude I didn't even realize it was Wednesday! Crazy. Today marks 5 weeks without candy. Just thought I'd share. Haha.


Doing The Best I Can

Man, you guys. This is a hard hard diet to be on. It seems like even though I'm trying my hardest to stick to it I'm failing. Do you have any idea how many food items have corn syrup in them? I mean really? A lot! I'm supposed to eat rice cereal and there wasn't any at the healthy Trader Joe's so I grabbed some Rice Krispies and voila! There's corn syrup in it. There's citric acid in all kinds of beverages, too, like fruit juice and my favo flavored sparkling water. I'm not supposed to have corn or citrus. On the milk/chocolate exclusion paperwork it says root beer is OK to drink so last night I had one because my blood sugar had plummeted to the point that I was turning into a homicidal maniac. Dude. My first soda in almost 5 weeks. It was delicious. I figure Jesus will forgive me for flaking on my Lent sacrifice because He must know I am not eating any delicious dessert items for the next 2 weeks instead. Anyway, my point wasn't confession. I had this delicious root beer and on the egg exclusion diet it says "NO ROOT BEER" because they put eggs in it for foam. No shit? I have to cross reference about 5 different diet plans and it sucks. But enough about that.
Last night I made it back to the gym and this morning I'm feeling that delightful tingle in my muscles reminding me that they're alive and well. I started out with a 15 minute brisk walk on the treadmill and concluded with a 15 minute jog. It was so invigorating. I can not wait to get back into the swing of things. Then I topped it off with a home-cooked meal and some hot tubbing. Can't complain.
The best part of last night was I Love New York. Did anyone else catch this freak show? Those brothers are a couple of cry babies, huh? There were so many classic moments but WTF was up with Tango's cap on sideways covering his right ear and half his head? Homeboy looked ridonkulous. I almost shat myself when Real got eliminated. I thought for sure he'd be the winner. Crazy. Now it's down to Chance and Tango and methinks Tango will have to win. Chance is too volatile and unpredictable and you can tell she really wants to be with him but it'll be just like Flav and New York. Lots of chemistry but no possibility of a relationship. Plus Tango loves his mama and he loves New York. Sigh. I'm so ashamed of that last paragraph. By the way? That charm school show starts on April 15th. Join me won't you? In the viewing of shame?


Weekend Wrap Up

On Friday night my ma and I went down to Los Angeles to see Wicked. Prior to the show we went to a cute Japanese restaurant and shared a boat that could have fed a small army. Delicious. That place was packed! As soon as someone was seated, another party came through the door. As for the show itself, just like on Broadway, it knocked my socks off. We were in row G of the orchestra right in the center. Close enough to see the microphones on the actors' foreheads yet far enough back that we didn't have to crane our necks to see the stage. When they dimmed the lights to signal the start of the show the audience went wild. You would have thought we were at a rock concert. Every song was applauded heartily. If you haven't seen this show yet, I highly recommend you do as soon as possible. It's worth the exorbitant cost of a ticket.
We got back home around midnight and had to be up at oh dark early to watch the nephew so I spent most of St. Patrick's Day exhausted. After babysitting, I decided to skip an afternoon of drinking in favor of a 3-hour nap. I woke up from my nap to find a voicemail saying my grandma had passed away. She was born on Halloween and died on St. Patrick's day. Pretty neat to come into this world on a holiday and then go out on one, too.
So to clear up the Jesus comment below, Eli and I had gone to see a local production of Jesus Christ Superstar Saturday night. Two plays in two days? Surely you jest! It was pretty awesome even if it was a little bit of a dated rock opera. I'd never seen it before other than on a VHS tape Eli had forced me to watch years ago. The same guy that starred in the movie, Ted Neeley, played Jesus on the stage. Judas was played by Corey Glover of Living Color fame. Cult of Personality indeed. We actually saw him walking around prior to the show and Eli was like a school girl when he saw him. Mind you, he said nothing but he did point at him with his mouth agape. Classy.
As for Sunday, not much to report. I've started this allergy testing thingamajig so most of Sunday was spent cleaning my linens and covering my mattresses and pillows with hypoallergenic cases. Fun fun stuff. I also have to go on a very restrictive diet that starts today. Like to hear about it? Here it goes. I cannot eat the following: milk, chocolate, soda, nuts, eggs, shell fish, citrus fruits, the pea and bean family, tomato, corn, wheat,oats, barley, rye, food colors and cinnamon. For 2 weeks. I've already been sans soda and candy for almost 5 weeks so that part isn't too hard. So help me if I don't drop any weight doing this I'll be suicidal. Oh. Not really. But it is Spring Break so it's back to the gym with me all week long. Hallelujah.
Phew. That was a long post. Please do not operate heavy machinery after reading this. I'm concerned for your safety.


Happy Belated St. Patrick's Day

Mine was spent with the nephew and Jesus Christ.
Hope yours was a blast.


I Love LA Haiku Friday

Oxnard to LA
Monday and Friday hockey
Tonight it's Wicked
Kings versus Blackhawks
The game went to a shoot out
Chicago took it
Carmen Electra,
Ryan Seacrest and Tara
were there, too


I Steal From BFF

Time Change

Do you remember a while back when I said that the time change couldn't come fast enough? Well it's here and apparently springing forward hasn't brought with it the good times I was looking for. In Oxnard we have a little something called May Gray and June Gloom which basically means that there's a lot of fog and very little sunshine. Doesn't make for much of a summer. That same kind of weather pattern is here now and it's almost Spring. What gives?
My current mood can best be summed up by that photograph in the upper left hand corner of this post. Murky Dismal's the name and gloom is his game. He's accompanied by his "evil" yet incredibly stupid sidekick, Lurky. They're from one of my favorite childhood cartoons, Rainbow Bright. Seeing that actually puts a smile on my face. Funny the things you remember from when you were wee.
Truthfully, I really have nothing to complain about. My social calendar is as full as ever, school's going very well and life in general isn't too shabby. Every now and then, though, it feels like all the little tiny speed bumps of life want to gang up on you all at once. It's that mood that makes you want to crawl under the covers and sleep all day. Or that tricks you into believing that cutting off all of your hair will solve all of your problems. Sigh. Here's to hoping Friday makes it all better.


Happy Humpin'

I must confess I have an unhealthy addiction to the show I Love New York on VH1. It's like a car crash or a train wreck and I simply cannot look away. Unfortunately, I missed it on Monday due to the hockey game. Luckily for me, they replay it pretty much every night of the week so I caught up last night. I was quite sad to see White Boy go. He seemed to genuinely dig that crazy bitch. Oh well. Now it's down to the two brothers, Chance and Real, and the handsome tattle tail - Tango. My prediction is that she will narrow it down to the brothers and Real will walk away the winner because New York's scary looking mama, Sister Patterson, seems to dig that guy. If Chance wins then it will only be because New York thrives off drama and wants to be an abused girlfriend. Again? She crazy.
Anyway, this obsession started with the second season of Flavor of Love because I loved watching the drama between the women competing for Flav's affection. For the most part, the men that are after New York have been entertaining but they're lacking that je ne sais pas that the cattiness of women brings. Though watching them get drunk and fighting is quite a sight... VH1 must have come to the same realization because they have a new show called MoNique's Charm School that basically takes the women of Flavor of Love and whoops their trampy asses into classy shape. Ohmygod. I. Can. Not. Wait. There's no premiere date but you bet your butts I will be watching. Shame on me.
Make me feel better, what's your guilty TV pleasure?


The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

The Good:
I went to the Kings/Oilers game last night and my team was finally triumphant. Did I bring my camera? Not so much. Anyway, LA smooshed those darned Canadians 5 to 1. Last night's game was reminiscent of last season when the Kings were in it to win it. Half a dozen "scuffles" in the third period had my brother practically jumping out of his skin and everyone is a winner.
Also, due to another's misfortune I get the opportunity to see Wicked at the Pantages Theater in LA on Friday. I saw this with BFF and Babe on Broadway and it knocked my socks off. I'll be anxious to see if the west coast is on par with the east on this one.

The Bad:
The reason I get to go to Wicked is because my father's mother is on her last legs right now. I guess the nurse told my aunt that grandma will probably not last until the end of the week. It's very sad and I hate the fact that my dad has to deal with all of this but I'm actually pretty unaffected for the most part. She and I were never very close as she lived far far away in North Dakota and we simply weren't a huge part in each other's lives after I grew into a big girl. Poor gal. She had a rough life.

The Ugly:
At the game my buddy Gerg commented on how the weather change was going to give him a cold sore. What do you know? I have one on my upper lip now. Excellent.


Let The Countdown Begin

Two months from today I will be turning 30. Technically that's all that's on my mind right now. Well that and getting a tattoo. Or cutting my hair off like I did here. However, the two of those actions lead me to believe I'm following down Britney's meltdown path. Quarter-life crisis? I thought I was done with that when I was 25. My horoscope is telling me to sober up but that's definitely going to interfere with my plans of getting wasted this weekend for one of my favorite holidays: St. Patrick's Day. Did that even segue correctly?
Seems as though all I can muster lately is snippets and I'm not really doing the blog any justice. Oh well. That's just the way it has to be for now. My schedooly is wearing me out. I had high hopes of going to see 300 at the IMAX this weekend but after we drove down to LA and found out it was sold out for the day, Hetero Life Partner and I just went to dinner and shopped instead. Mostly I just spent the last couple of days cleaning the shit out of every place I spend time in: the apartment, my desk at work, Vehicular... my thumbs are sore to prove how diligently I cleaned.
It was hot here yesterday. Damn hot. In the 90s. I spent the day napping and resting. Watched a lot of TV. Drank a few beers. I can not wait til summer. Classes be damned.
Man. This qualifies as the most boring post ever. Sucks.


Quotes of the Day

My mom before her colonscopy:
We're running a little behind.
My mom after her colonoscopy:
I have the colon of a 3 year old.

Eat Fresh Haiku Friday

Boyfriend at Subway
Extra meat and toppings, too
Mondays and Wednesdays
Asked him for cookies
The meal comes with two of them
But he snuck me three
A flirty kidlet
Putting a smile on my face
Healthy food with love


Lack Of Love Thursday

WTF, you guys??? I ask you to cross your fingers so I don't have to pay out the ass on my taxes but I guess you can't do one simple thing for me. Know why? Well my tax man called and told me that I owe $878 to federal and $694 to state. Holy Moses! That's quite a chunk of change! Aren't I supposed to get $1,572 back and not pay that ungodly amount? Le Sigh.

Not only that but stupid Cingular forgot to send me a bill last month so I not only have a past due bill with London charges ($34 extra for like 20 minutes worth of calls!) but I get the privilege of paying this month's bill at the same time! Double the money, double the fun. I have had AT&T/Cingular/AT&T as a provider for over 10 years and have never missed a bill nor have I ever sent a late payment. I miss one and am told that I should have looked it up online and that they send the bill the same time every month. Sass mouth! Then they proceed to badger me with three collection calls in a day. When I got the last call I told them I swore to God if they called me one more time after I told them I had mailed both payments that I would cancel my account. Guess what. The calls stopped. Sons of Bitches.

I'm going to miss The Office tonight and I'm super duper upset about that. Instead I'm forced to go see the stupid Diary of Anne Frank play for my stupid Multicultural Drama class. What's multicultural about Anne Frank? Haha. J/K, you guys. J/K. It's gonna be GREAT! In no way do I want to stay home and watch the reunion of Jim and Pam. Psyche.

I guess the good news is that it could always be worse. It just feels like I want to be Eeyore today with a wee raincloud over my head.


Hump Day Snippets

  • My professor attempted to teach our class last night even though the fire alarm was going off in the background for an hour. Non-stop. She finally decided to release us before we went bat shit crazy and ate each other's faces due to the madness induced by the incessant beeping.
  • I am finally the proud owner of return address labels bearing my name and location. My parents have gotten these things in the mail for ages from charity seekers but not me. Until now. I felt like a dick for not making a contribution but oh well! Looks like I better not move any time soon.
  • My referral for an allergist consultation was approved yesterday so I have an appointment next week. They're not going to stick me with needles yet. My need for that still has to be determined.
  • My taxes are being done this afternoon so cross your fingers for me that I don't owe anyone anything. When I changed jobs in May I had to cash out the retirement I'd accrued at the city and I'm scurred I'll have to pay the gubment.
  • Tattoos have been on my mind lately and I was thinking of getting that skull and crossbones (aka Skurvy) up there on the inside of one of my heels. I'd appreciate it if you told me I was nuts or brilliant.
  • Speaking of tattoos, is the story of Britney writing 666 on her head and screaming she's the Antichrist only to attempt to hang herself with a sheet at her rehab and maybe asking K-Fed to reconcile and procreate again true? I figured if it was Perez Hilton or TMZ.com, which I may or may not be addicted to, would have covered it. Anyone have the deets?

Happy Humpin' Y'all.


Chemistry Update

I thought my crush on the good doctor (also known as my professor) had passed but last night I could have kissed him square on the lips. Let's just say my attendance in this class thus far has been less than stellar. Because of my sick spell and a quick jaunt up to San Francisco I missed about two weeks which roughly translates to four classes. Not a great thing to do immediately prior to the midterm. Since I was absent, I didn't turn in a problem set so I lost 60 points towards my grade. I blame no one but myself. Did I study for the midterm? Sort of, but I took comfort in knowing he drops the lowest test score so I wouldn't say I crammed or anything. So last week when I took the midterm I just hoped for the best. Yesterday I found out my best is 71/100. I took that to mean I got a C so I was pretty stoked as BFF told me "That's a c for fucking bad ass." To that I reply, "Holla." Well thanks to a pretty wicked curve, that 71 turned into an 85 and I walked out of class with a big fat B. I don't really know why I'm posting this other than I'm super proud of myself and am fishing for compliments but whatever. Like I've said in the past, it's my blog and I'll write what I want to. Write what I want to. You would write too if it happened to you. Or something.



It's so rare to see a great movie anymore that I almost feel like summing Zodiac up in one word: Go. How Wild Hogs beat this movie in the box office is beyond me and frankly it says much about the sad state of cinema in general. As an avid, borderline obsessive, fan of Court TV and A&E for their investigative programming, (Bill Curtis and Dayle Hinman, if you're reading this, I love you) I got sucked into this movie almost instantaneously. How disappointed was I when I got that familiar tingle in my bladder telling me to make a mad dash to the bathroom! Zodiac is pretty much non-stop and has an extremely riveting storyline. The majority of the movie is dialogue with very few graphic murder scenes which is how I'd imagine a true crime investigation going down. However, the few violent scenes shown will have you squirming in your seat. Jake Gyllenhaal's character is a newspaper cartoonist who becomes obsessed with the unsolved case and decides to write a book about it. There are times during his investigation that are extremely intense and nerve wracking but there was never a moment I was terrified. Somehow, I think Zodiac is a better movie because of that. Robert Downey Jr. is your go-to guy when it comes to playing drugged out or washed up. The rest of the cast is equally, if not more, impressive. Goose, I'm sorry, Anthony Edwards, makes a comeback here and it's good to see his face on the big screen. Chloe Sevigny earned my respect with Big Love and she shines as Gyllenhaal's wife. I could literally go on and on about this movie but I'm not sure what I'd say other than I loved it and it was great to see an insanely smart film for a change. Make sure you go in with an empty stomach and skip the drinks, though, as Zodiac comes in at just under 3 hours.


Long Overdue Nephew

Babysat last night... can you tell? Monkey in his swinging chair
Happy Man
Eyes as big as his mouthIn the Bebe Pod Auntie bought him Teething or pensive with daddy in the back
The world's most evil beagle puppy - DukeSnuck this shoddy shot while he was sleeping on my chest,
Lips that rival Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt


Dying Grandma Haiku Friday

Not eating, drinking
Late stages of Alzheimer's
Moved her to hospice
No meds or IV
They give her two weeks to live
Blessing in disguise
My dad's so stoic
Putting affairs in order
All for his mother


Love Thursday or Snippets: You Decide

That up there is my nephew giving you the stink eye.
Love that monkey.
  • Last night I dreamed I was Samuel L. Jackson and I was an assassin and shot two rich white folks and was on the run disguised at a homeless person. I blame the glass of wine I had before bedtime.
  • My grandmother on my dad's side who I hardly know has been given 2 weeks to live. That is some sad shit.
  • I may or may not have failed my chemistry midterm last night but at least my ink was on the page so it wasn't a total bombing.
  • Tomorrow I have a massage scheduled and would like to continue doing that at the first of the month for as long as I live. Amen.
  • How is it possible I've gone through 3 boxes of tissues in the last month and the snot just keeps on coming?
  • Yesterday marked one week without candy or soda for me minus a wee slip up that I'm not counting - a cookie containing approximately 4 M&Ms.

That's all I've got really. Nothing super exciting has been going on as you can clearly see by the above statements. Hope you have a nice Thursday, y'all.