Happy Birthday, Bubbo!

That right there is my favorite and only uncle. Throughout my life he has been more like an older brother to me even though 18 years separate us. He lived with my parents when I was a baby and I guess that's when he became my hero. He introduced me to my love for religious icons as well as to Skurvy (that Paul Frank skull and crossbones I rock all over the place). He broke me in when it came to punk music, Blondie and remixed dance music (AKA Gay Dance Party). Without him I wouldn't have tried indie movies or have this appreciation for British humor that I do. It was his love of London and New York that encouraged me to travel alone and to fall in love with the latter city. He encourages me in my photography and in my life. He has taught me tolerance for alternative lifestyles by gradually introducing me to gay culture in both Los Angeles and The Castro in San Francisco. When I moved away from home for the first time at 19, it was his guest house I lived in. When I first learned to drive the freeway, he was one of the first people I visited out of town. I guess what I'm trying to say is, my uncle is a huge reason I am the person I am today. For that I wish him the happiest birthday! XOXO


Doctor/Patient Privilege Much?

I have a doctor's appointment this morning to see why I have gotten a cold or virus or flu or bug every two weeks for the last few months. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. Man, does that give you deja vu, too? I know I've typed that before. A few years ago I noticed I was gaining weight and was depressed and lethargic and the doctor had the brilliant idea to test me for hypothyroidism. Turns out I had it and I've been taking medication for it for the last couple of years. My depression lifted for the most part but I'm still chubby and sleepy. I chalk that up to being part bear but I could be wrong. Anyhow, yesterday I went to get a blood test and my mom just called me at work to give me my results. "Your mom?" you ask? Why not my doctor? Oh well it just so happens we are both his patients and he called her instead of me. That part I'm not so shocked about. The fact that he actually revealed confidential information about my health to my mother when I am a grown ass woman is just totally inappropriate. What if it had been an AIDS test or a pregnancy test? Needless to say, he'll be hearing about this later.
According to my doctor there is no reason for my illnesses. None. Nothing I can do about being susceptible to everything that comes 'round the bend. No herb I can sip, no pill I can take, no vitamin supplement. There is nothing wrong with my red blood cells, my thyroid levels are fine and I'm not anemic. I've been given a clean bill of health. Bossman says it's mental illness but I don't think mental illness runs out of your nose or drips down the back of your throat. I'm just saying. And it isn't hypochondria because I have symptoms you can actually see. So there. I'm so mother-fucking, cock-sucking, son-of-a-bitching frustrated right now I could spit. I just want to be well!!!


911 Is A Joke In Yo' Town

Buzz commented on my 23 post below that I didn't go see Reno 911:Miami but I did! 2 movies in 2 days? I am a happy camper. Mind you, neither of those movies was the cat's pajamas but they entertained me and that's all I can ask for. 911 provided a lot of laughs but it was essentially an extended version of the television program only enhanced by gratuitous toplessness and profanity. I don't know that I love the idea that I paid full price to go see it in the theater as I think the DVD would have sufficed but thank God for gift certificates because it was technically free. I love Dangle's tiny tiny shorts more than anything else in the movie. Really, that's all I can say about it. Funny but it could have been a Comedy Central movie, no?



Hetero Life Partner and I decided to ignore the critics' one-star ratings of The Number 23 and gave it a view last night. So often magazine reviews of upcoming films tend to be a bit too harsh and they don't usually gel with my taste in movies so I ignore them. This time, though, they were pretty much right on the money in trashing this one. Carrey works in animal control and after a dog bite, a series of events occur that bring him to read a book entitled The Number 23. He relates so much to the lead character, a detective driven to murder thanks to an obsession with 23, that he slowly begins to unravel. (Side note here - one reviewer said that Carrey's narration voice was borrowed from Ben Stiller's Zoolander character and damn if he wasn't dead on. Not that that distracted me or anything...) I'll give Joel Schumacher credit here by saying visually this movie is quite creative and pleasing to the eye. It borrows its look from film noir movies of old and looks like a pulp fiction novel come to life. Basically Carrey and a very svelte Virginia Madsen play dual characters in dual story lines so the visuals separate the two. The Number 23 has a plot twist at the end that I didn't see coming but it wasn't good enough to save this movie. And? It wasn't even scary like I thought it would be. Personally, I think Jim Carrey should go back to the funny. Maybe team up with Tom Hanks and have a good laugh so the two of them can return to being the comedic actors I fell in love with. Maybe bring Bosom Buddies to the big screen with Carrey taking over Peter Scolari's role. Oh, Buffy and Hildegarde, we need you now more than ever.



Fyrchk recently lost her uncle to cancer. Show her your sympathy by making a donation to her Relay for Life fundraising efforts. She's more than halfway to reaching her goal. Thank you.

Nasal Congestion Haiku Friday

Went to the Kings game
Missed first period - traffic
Hardly worth the drive
Unable to breathe
Sinus headache, nose blowing
Umpteenth cold this year
Weekend plans for you?
I plan to chill so hard core
Maybe see Monkey

Hints from Heloise via Randi's Blog

In case any of you loved the recipe from last week's Haiku Friday here are some additional tips:
  • Use white or yellow mix as it works better than chocolate. Apparently the chocolate becomes rock hard and dry.
  • You can add chocolate chips, raisins, nuts, etc. if it tickles your fancy.
  • If you want to adjust the recipe for cutout cookies, add 2 heaping tablespoons of flour to the recipe to stiffen the batter in order to roll it on a cutting board.
  • Decorate with sprinkles so they're gorgeous.
  • Here's that recipe again:

Cake Batter Cookies
Three-hundred fifty degrees
One box of cake mix
Add 2 eggs to it
Half a cup of veggie oil
Bake for eight to ten


Against the Grain

After struggling with a case of writer's block, I dropped by my friend Kevin's blog this morning and was inspired. His topic was Following the Plan and he examines being a single student at the age of 29. It's funny how when we hit our late twenties people start to worry about settling down and being done with school because that is what is expected of them by society's standards. I see it in the same vein as married people being questioned when they will procreate. Quite frankly, I have to wonder why it's anyone's business. Personally, there are times when I regret not having finished my degree earlier in life because it isn't always easy being one of the oldest students in class and juggling a nighttime school schedule with a full-time work load. Ultimately, though, I'm doing it now and there are a lot of people who don't even go to college so right away I'm at an advantage. Also? I think I'm getting more out of my education as an adult than I ever would have as a self-centered gal in her early twenties.
I am a single woman on the verge of 30 and at times I feel like I'm on the brink of Old Maid status. However, had I married the man I thought I would have at the tender age of 24 I have a feeling my life would not be as happy and fulfilling as it is now. When I look at who I was then compared to who I am now, I'm a completely different person. Why the rush to marry in your twenties when people are living to their nineties? Why stay in a mediocre relationship just because you are afraid of being single in your thirties? At times I wonder if I'll ever have kids of my own but people are having children later and later in life so that comforts me. Hell, I don't even know if I want kids...
I guess what this all boils down to is that everyone should be able to march to the beat of their own drummer and follow their own dreams at their own pace without someone else giving them shit about it. What works for you doesn't necessarily work for me and that's that. So I'll leave you with the same question Kevin left his readers:
1) Did you follow “the plan” and are you happy, or did you follow it and regret it?
2) If you didn’t follow “the plan”are you happy that you didn’t or regret that you didn’t?


Ash Hump Day

So thanks for the input on yesterday's post but you guys are all cheaters. You're not supposed to give up something you don't like. Silly monkeys. I've decided to go with soda and candy. I eat more candy in a day than most people do in a week because our office doubles as a candy store apparently. For instance, my folks went to Walgreen's and the Valentine's Day candy was on clearance. They went to grab a couple boxes and the owner said, "Take as much as you can put in your cart for $30." So they did. An entire cart full. Mom reckons she got about $400 dollars worth. Half of that is now in my office. I have a bag of Reese's peanut butter cup miniatures and a bag of Hershey's Kissables in my possession that I will dive into post-Easter. Scottsdale Girl gave a brilliant recommendation to do volunteer work for Lent but I'm so busy I can hardly find time to take a shit never mind working for a soup kitchen. Perhaps some other time when I'm feeling charitable instead of like a big fat heifer.

And on a completely unrelated note, it was Chinese New Year recently and this is the Year of the Boar (pig, whatever). So here's little piece of trivia for you: In Mandarin the word for meat automatically defaults to mean pork because apparently that is the most eaten meat in China. How about that??? The picture below is a boar made of plants and flowers I saw in a shop in the Castro over the weekend. Very clever.

Oh No She Didn't

If you look closely at this photograph of a random woman on the ferry to Sausalito, you can see what I consider as a sign of the apocalypse. If you are a woman or girl that lived through the late 80s/early 90s, you will recognize that to be a banana clip. I had no idea these were still in production but I used to rock this look almost on the daily when I was in the 7th and/or 8th grade. First leggings, now this? What is the world of fashion coming to?

Oh. And if you want to see more pics, click here. You don't need to sign in, just click the picture I think...


Fat Tuesday.

Yup. The "F" word has resurfaced. A weekend full of gluttony and overindulgence in the gorgeous city by the bay - San Francisco. I'll post pictures soon. I had a great weekend. Took the ferry to Sausalito. Apparently its residents are known as Sausolitonians. Crazy. 12 hours of driving in a span of 3 days makes for some sore legs and a tired ass. Back to work after a much needed 3-day weekend. Have to play catch-up on some homework. Actual professional work to be done. Not much in the mood for posting but feel I should at least say hello. Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, the start of Lent. If you're Catholic you're expected to give something up until Easter to better relate to the sacrifice Jesus made when he died on the cross. What would you give up? 40 days...


Cookie Recipe Haiku Friday

Cake Batter Cookies
Three-hundred fifty degrees
One box of cake mix
Add 2 eggs to it
Half a cup of veggie oil
Bake for eight to ten
So very yummy
I bought confetti cake mix
Makes them pretty, too


Two In A Day?

The hell you say! I just left my "Queer" class and the entire session was spent watching the star-packed film, Kinsey. What a great movie, you guys. Seriously. If you haven't seen it yet I really recommend that you put it on your Netflix queue or take a quick trip to the local rental place. The best part for me? Well that would have to be the tiniest cameo by my imaginary boyfriend! Picture me exclaiming "Ohmygod it's Jim from The Office!" Yes. I am lame. Anywho, back to the flick. Everyone does a stellar job in their roles so I'm not going to bother singling anyone out for their performance. What an incredible story. What an eye opener. For anyone that believes particular sexual behaviors are unacceptable, you should absolutely make this a mandatory viewing for yourself to open your mind. Imagine if we hadn't come from Puritanical belief! Imagine separating morality from science. Imagine the possibilities. According to the film, Kinsey and his wife had problems consummating their marriage and had to turn to someone for help. This led to great sex and the development of almost an obsessive compulsion for Kinsey to help others with their sexual issues. And what a revoluton he started. It just goes to show you, it only takes one person and a ton of passion to make a change.
Also? Peter Sarsgaard sounds exactly like John Malkovich. Please tell me you agree. In this movie - full frontal Sarsgaard nudity. Nice.

Love Thursday Test Run

The lovely HDW suggested that I try out Love Thursday as a substitute to HNT. I'll give it a go seeing as yesterday was the day of love and I experienced a movie (something I love) that contained things I love: Drew Barrymore, comedy and pop music. Music and Lyrics follows the rom-com formula to a T so it has an element of predictability and a comfortable feel like you've been down that road before. There are times where it drags a bit but it's just a good old-fashioned date movie. My mom, Hetero Life Partner and I were all alone on Valentine's Day so it was just a feel-good film to go to even if it was a bit cheesy at times. Hugh Grant spends the majority of the film popping and thrusting his hips as an 80s has-been pop star-cum-songwriter. Drew is his ditzy, plant watering muse. Fate throws them together and they fall in love. Of course there's more to it than that but not really. I'm going to give kudos to Kristen Johnston, formerly of 3rd Rock From The Sun fame. She plays Drew's older sister who as a teen was smitten with Hugh Grant's pop star character and I found her to be really hilarious. This movie won't win an award or change your life but the giggles it provides are worth the price of admission. Plus? They play homage to VH1's Pop Up Video... I mean... come on.
So I'm not sure if this counted as Love Thursday so much as a mid-week movie review but there you have it.


Black Wednesday

Valentine's day is a holiday I haven't celebrated in a long time. Ever since my on-again/off-again ex of 5 years broke up with me twice on February 14th it has kind of lost its appeal. However I'm still representing with my red sweater, heart jewelry and festive holiday socks. I am more than ready for the incessant commercial bombardment to come to a screeching halt. There should not be a stigma associated with singlehood or for not having a sig other one day out of the year. If I see another online article about how to "survive" VD if you are single, I promise you I will lose it. Has anyone ever died because they were alone on this day? In order to put a fun spin on VD, leave me a comment about your best or worst ever. Come on. You know you want to. Oh. And Happy Valentine's Day. I love you.
VD and Valentine's Day - both have a tendency to reoccur.

First Reaction

Brought to you by the letters BFF:
1. Beer: Mother's Milk
2. Anorexic: Sickeningly fashionable
3. Relationships: Unsuccessful
4. Your Last Ex: Lingers
5. Power Rangers: Pogs
6. Weed: Giggling munchies
7. Air Freshener: Artificial flavoring for the bathroom
8. Smoking: Stinky fingers after a night of drunken debauchery
9. The president: Not qualified for the job
10. Fish: Sushi - I like it raw.
11. Cars: Vehicular Manslaughter
12. Gas Price: Mo'Money
13. Halloween: Bite sized candies
14. Bon Jovi: Bad hair on men
15. Religion: Evil brainwashing
16. Myspace: Breeding ground for whores and deviants
17. Worst fear: Never again feeling the butterflies of love in my stomach
18. Marriage: Not in the near future
19. Paris Hilton: Utterly useless
20. Brunettes: Intelligence
21. Redheads: BFF's hubby
22: Politics: Wish I knew more about 'em
23: Pass the time: Naps!
24. One night stands: Unfulfilling
25: Cell Phone: Broken and expensive to replace
26: Pixie Stix: Crack for kids
27: Vanilla ice cream: An empty canvas for flavor
28: Port a Potties: Tailgating
29: High: Been there
30. Pajamas: Are for lounging in, not sleeping in.
31. Woods: Heh heh. You said "wood."
32. Wet Socks: Blisters in NY
33. Alcohol: Alcoholics
34. The word 'love': Say it like you mean it
35. My best friend(s): are a very patient group that I couldn't live without
36. Money: Wish I had more
37. Headache: Worst thing ever
38. Love: Ethan
39. Time: stands still for no man.
40. Divorce: stay away from my family.



Motivation? I lack thee. Present yourself unto me so I shall get my lazy ass off my couch. The Office (Season 2 on DVD) is so good. As much as I don't want to admit this, I played hookie from class last night so I could watch Disc 3. Honestly? That is unacceptable. Mind you, I also finished my laundry and fulfilled my cat sitting duties so it wasn't a total wash but missing school so that I can bear witness to the development of Jim and Pam's blossoming office romance? Someone slap me upside my head. Please.You guys, I haven't been to the gym regularly in a while and now it's Cadbury MiniEggs season and that is a lethal combination. Seriously the best candy ever. March 11th, also known as when we spring forward, cannot come soon enough. Before then, however, I must break my habit of jumping into my sweatpants the second I walk in the door. I. Must. Put. The. Mini. Eggs. Down.


Celebrity Look-alikes Revisited


My mom just used the term "Hell Bent For Leather" to describe a woman at her poker table over the weekend. Ever heard of it? Me neither. This site defines it as the following:

Of the two sayings, “hell bent,” meaning “recklessly determined,” is the more common today, and has been popular since the early 19th century, describing someone who is prepared to go “to the gates of hell” in pursuit of a goal. “Hell for leather,” on the other hand, means specifically “riding (a horse) very fast and recklessly,” and is rarely heard today. The first recorded use of “hell for leather,” by the way, was in a story written in 1889 by Rudyard Kipling, who probably either invented the phrase or picked it up from British Army troops in India. Just what the “leather” in the phrase means is uncertain -- it may refer to a leather crop used to spur the horse, or it may refer to the wear and tear inflicted on the saddle by strenuous riding.

She drops these pearls of wisdom every now and then but really that saying came about in the late 1800s. Who talks like that??? I'll try to post these as they come up so that you too can use random sayings that no one will understand. Sure beats a word of the day!

El Laberinto del Fauno

Yesterday afternoon I went to see the amazing Pan's Labyrinth. This, in my opinion, is how movies should be made. The Captain is quite possibly the best villain I've ever seen in a movie. Ever. Period. He is pure, unadulterated evil. There are several scenes that had me covering my eyes with my sweatshirt and others that had me as delighted and fascinated as a child. This, however, is definitely not a children's fairy tale. It's a very dark movie set in fascist Spain in the mid-40s. In Pan's Labyrinth there are two stories occuring simultaneously. One is about guerrillas trying to overthrow the Captain. The other involves a young girl and her mother, married to the Captain and pregnant with his son, that move to a mill next to a magical labyrinth. And no, David Bowie is not there in a codpiece. The girl learns from a faun that she is a princess and has to accomplish 3 feats in order to inherit her kingdom. They are disgusting and terrifying feats but it's a treat to watch this young girl overcome such incredible obstacles. The ending disappointed the person I went to see it with but I was quite pleased. After sitting through so many bullshit movies in the past year it was refreshing to see something completely different than anything I've ever seen before. Not only that but it had me laughing, terrified, sad and enthralled all in 90 minutes time. And just in case you were unaware, this movie is in Spanish with English subtitles. Go see this. You won't be disappointed. Just make sure you don't eat beforehand. There is quite a bit of very graphic violence.


RIP Anna Nicole Smith Haiku Friday

"I brake for Zach Braff"
Strange sentiment to have for
A license plate ring
Went to McDonald's
Quarter Pounder With Cheese Meal
Why did I do it?
I just can't get full
Filling emotional voids
With sweet tasty treats


10 More Things

Or 55 but who's counting? Stolen from Hella:
10 Firsts
1. First Best Friend: Crusty - We met at the ripe age of 2. She was my neighbor. I had a big girl bed that she coveted. She's family now.
2. First Car: An '89 silver Ford Taurus that I literally drove until it fell apart. Thanks, Dad.
3. First Love: It has to be my nephew, Ethan. When he was born my heart exploded and I cried everywhere. To love someone that is minutes old is incomparable.
4. First Vacation: Cross country road trip with the folks where I apparently sang the ABC song into the ground and loveloveloved Elvira by the Oakridge Boys. Giddyup a boom, poppaboom, poppamowmow.
5. First Job: Babysitter at the tender, impressionable age of 12.
6. First Piercing: My ears obviously but the only other would be a belly button ring I've had since the day after high school graduation... going on 12 years now. Damn, I'm old.
7. First Concert: I believe it was Michael Jackson at Dodger Stadium with my Dad
8. First Record/CD bought: I don't remember my first purchase but the first record I fell in love with was Sesame Street on my Fisher Price record player.
9. First Real Love: I believe this was covered in number 3.
10. First Screen Name: My first email was randipoo because my dad used to call my mom (Andrea) Andypoo when they were dating. How creative. Now I just go by Randi as that is my Christian name.
9 Latest
1. Latest Alcoholic Beverage: Fat Tire for life!
2. Latest Car Ride: Coming to work this morning
3. Latest Movie Watched: Smokin' Aces.
4. Latest Phone Call Made: To South Carolina for a work PO
5. Latest Jacuzzi Bath: Probably about a month ago I went to the hot tub, does that count?
6. Latest CD Played: A Corazon Abierto by Alejandro Fernandez. Sexiest. Voice (and face!). Ever.
7. Latest Time You Cried: Wednesday night.
8. Latest Meal: Special K with strawberries
9. Latest Curse: I don't even notice when I curse because it happens so often. Shit?
8 Have You Ever
1. Dated on of your best friends: He became a close friend later but "best" is pushing it.
2. Been Arrested: Not yet...
3. Fallen in love at first sight: Yes. But it could have been lust now that I think of it.
4. Been in a T.V. program: The Big Tomato, a local show when I was a Brownie (Girl Scout)
5. Had your heart broken: Much
6. Said you love someone without meaning it: Yes to avoid an awkward situation. I was 17.
7. Made a prank phone call: Yes of course! Anyone who hasn't yet totally should.
8. Shoplifted anything: I stole 2 Disneyland figurines and some lipstick in 8th grade.
7 Things You Wear
1. Glasses
2. Diamond Earrings
3. Watch
4. Thumb ring
5. Undergarments
6. Clothing
7. My heart on my sleeve
6 Things You've Done Today
1. Got out of bed
2. Dressed myself
3. Fed myself
4. Drove to work
5. Blogged
6. Dabbled in work
5 Favorite Things
1. Being an Aunt
2. Cuddling
3. Movies
4. Reading
5. Eating
4 People I Can Tell Anything To
1. BFF
2. Crusty
3. Anyone who will listen
4. The blog world (I'm not much of a keeper of my own secrets, can you tell?)
3 Choices
1. Black or White? This is the problem - we shouldn't forget the shades of gray
2. Summer or Winter? Winter in NY because it doesn't exist in CA
3. Chocolate or Chips? Chocolate in any shape or form
2 Things To Do Before You Die
1. See the world
2. Get my mother-effing Bachelor's Degree
1 Thing You Regret
1. Having so little self esteem that I lost sight of myself and my needs for so long.


I Had To Get It Out!

Apparently attending classes at CSUCI is going to turn me into a gay rights activist whether I like it or not. Last night in my theater class we were discussing the performance I told you guys about last week. There were two apparently: one on Wednesday that I attended and another on Friday that was a student performance built out of workshops with the performer, Tim Miller. I was talking to my classmate about Wednesday's show and she said, "I'm glad I didn't attend that one because I don't agree with the gay lifestyle." Fine. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. She basically alluded to the theory that being gay is a choice. I said, "Really? You think someone would choose to have no rights to marry or adopt and face a lifetime of discrimination? Interesting." It's what she said next that made me lose my shit.
She said: Being gay is like deciding to be a drug user, once you make the choice and get into it, it's hard to get out.
Oh. My. Fucking. God. All I could do was nod and tell her I respected her opinion or I would have shot her in the face. Is this really what people think? I know for a fact that she works for a church... is that what they're teaching? If so I'm glad I don't go because the Jesus I kick it with is loving and understanding and accepting. Not someone that died on a cross to breed hatred and ignorance.
That's all I can say about that. This is going to be a much harder battle to wage than I ever thought.


Living My Life Like It's Golden

Damn, that's a great Jill Scott song... Anyway, I'm done with the heavy, socially challenging posts for a while. Apparently all of this education I'm getting has turned me into Oprah but that shit is coming to a screeching halt. Let's have some fun! Ok, now I'm getting away from myself. Let's just say that yesterday I closed a doorway to my past. Took out the papers and the trash, if you will. It's bittersweet because I may very well have lost a friend but it had to be done in order for me to move on with my life. Can't be weighted down with excess baggage at this point. To "celebrate" this new chapter of my life I made spontaneous dinner plans with the fella I mentioned a few weeks back. Is that sort of an oxymoron? Spontaneous plans? Probably. I'm a planner so if I don't know days in advance if I'm doing something I consider a random gathering spontaneous. Wow. Long winded much? I ordered a chimichanga which is basically a deep fried burrito for those of you that don't habla espanol. It was bigger than a baby and covered with at least a bag's worth of grated cheese, heaping mounds of guacamole and sour cream. Essentially, it was an impossible feat to eat. Hehe. I rhymed. While the dinner itself was impressive, so was the conversation. God, do I love great conversation. I really don't know where I was going with this post other than to say that I'm certainly glad I ditched the past, stepped out of my comfort zone and tried something new. It's hard to put into words how rewarding it feels. K, that's all. Back to work!


New Year Resolutions Revisited

At the end of the year we all make resolutions for the following year: to lose weight, to floss at night, to hit the gym more regularly. I can honestly say that my resolutions included all of the above. While I'm not exactly excelling in any of them and it's the first of February is beside the point. The effort is there. I definitely am buying diet food, own floss and went to the gym twice this weekend. But it's a marathon, not a race... right?
Anyway, in my LGBT class, the same ignorant student that suggested that pharmaceutical companies are hiding the cure for AIDS in order to rid the world of the poor, black and gay also made a brilliant suggestion. Her proposal was this: what if instead of focusing on ourselves for our new year resolutions we set our sights on helping others. This would include being more active in our communities, donating more to charities and being all-around better human beings toward others. To pay it forward, I guess you could say. It definitely got me thinking about how selfish my actions tend to be and how "blind" I can be when it comes to the rest of the world's problems. For instance, I want to donate fight for my uncle's right to marry but my motives are selfish - I don't want him to move to Germany and be far from me. Interesting, eh?
So I guess I'm wondering what resolutions did you start out with and, upon reflection, how would you revise them now? Or would you?


Stolen From "Too Disgusting..."

make your own here

The Return of The Critic

I was just marvelling that it had been a while since I'd been to the theater to catch a new flick. Apparently in the last three weeks (I think I went just before London) the ticket prices have risen to $9.25 in my neighborhood cinema. Dang. I guess I'll be sticking to DVD. So in that vein, here are 2 reviews stemming from yesterday.

Smokin' Aces
When I saw the trailer for this movie I knew in an instant I had to go. Not only did it boast a starring cast of nearly every actor in the free world but it also resembled the Quentin Tarantino/Guy Ritchie/Robert Rodriguez genre I have grown to love and cherish. Aces is like an over the top, overly long music video with lots of color and sound and action pretty much at all times. The characters are also very diverse and comic book-like. Jeremy Piven's character's name is Aces and he is a trashed mess in this movie. Not anything like the Ari I know and love. Ryan "Van Wilder" Reynolds has graduated from comic actor to a serious actor, (I felt) holding his own against the always fun to watch Ray Liotta. Aces also showcases the movie debuts of both Alicia Keys and Common, probably two of my favorite characters. Ben Affleck, who has surprisingly grown on me much like Marky Mark (without a role in this movie), has the nicest teeth in show business. While I'm not sure he's sporting his own choppers in this movie, wow. Apparently he had to smoke so much for this role he's decided to kick the habit for good. That's beside the point however. Should you see this movie? I think yes though I don't know that it was worth the whole $9.25 I dropped so consider a matinee. DVD purchase was definitely a consideration until the disappointing ending but up until then, enjoy the ride.
Season 1 of The Office on DVD
I only just fell into watching this program on television this current season so I thought that I should buy the first 2 on DVD to catch up on what I've been missing. There is potential I'll get stoned to death (I wish!) for this next statement, but I don't know that I love the 6 episodes that comprise Season 1. The Pam and Jim love story is so sweetly done that it's irresistible, don't get me wrong. But Michael (my comic hero, Steve Carell)? Honestly, I'm glad he's toned it down a notch in the later episodes I've seen. This first season makes him look like such a bumbling idiot that I'm not sure he'd have made it to regional manager. Scratch that... with his racist and ignorant comments I'd be surprised if he'd have survived long enough to make it to regional manager. He's funny, don't get me wrong, just terribly stupid. Dwight, the tragically coiffed Rainn Wilson, is hilarious and he plays so well off of all the other office mates that he steals nearly every scene he's in. First seasons are always a bit awkward but this is definitely a great show. I'm looking forward to seeing its growth in Season 2.


2-for-1 Haiku Friday

I own it for the whole day
You can own it, too!
Give her some money
She's doing Relay for Life
"Eff You" to cancer
It's not that darn hard
Five, ten, or twenty dollars
Every penny counts

Chilly Haiku Friday

The brisk ocean breeze
Combined with snowy mountains
Make for a coooold day
Ignorant classmates
Conspiracy theorists***
Hidden cure for AIDS?!?!?
Auntie and Ethan
Babysitting the monkey
He's all mine tonight!
***Not that it's a big deal but it's interesting: theorist can be two OR three syllables.


They're Here, They're Queer...

I didn't get much opportunity to talk about my Thursday "Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual/Transgender course last week because the aftermath landed on Haiku Friday but this class is promising to be a goodie. It's an English/Gender Studies class and my professor is a lesbian lover of literature who tosses the term "queer" around like it's going out of style. I wasn't exactly comfortable with it because I don't use queer as a synonym for gay but she justified her use of it to people of African American descent calling each other the N-word (God forbid I actually write it out!) so they own it. Now we have Chem guy who digs "certainly," my theater prof who hearts "exciting" and then this gal loving the word "queer." Perhaps I should go forward calling them each by an alias using their favorite words in case they decide to Google themselves and land upon this little blog of mine... another thought for another day I suppose. I was blown away by how many people in my LGBT class had no history of interaction with a homosexual person. It was as if all of these teenagers and people in their early twenties had been in a cave for the span of their lives. It was simply shocking the amount of ignorant statements made and I know I'm going to have a hard time biting my tongue when it comes discussion time in class but that's all well and good I suppose. Maybe I should learn to keep some things to myself anyway.
So tonight a guest speaker, performance artist Tim Miller, is coming into our classroom. My drama prof required the class to go see his one-man show last night and so I did. I have to say, I was somewhat impressed. That's not necessarily my bag but it's always nice to be exposed to new things. The focus of the performance, however, was his relationship with his Australian partner, Alistair and the problems they have had because the United States will hardly allow him a Visa, forget about citizenship. This touched a vein for me because my uncle is in the exact same situation with his boyfriend who is from Germany. I'm not going to get all political here but I think it is absolute bullshit that this is even an issue. WTF does the government have to do with our sexuality and who we fall in love with? Why can I marry my uncle's boyfriend and it would be legit but my uncle can't? Will my uncle be forced to move to Germany where same-sex marriages are not only permitted but accepted? It would be devastating to be separated from him because of something as simple as him wanting to be with the one he loves and America not allowing that.
It is up to us, the "next generation" so to speak to make a difference. I don't want my nephew growing up in a country that is prejudice against love. Here are some links in case you, like me, are interested in becoming active in immigration equality and the legalization of gay marriage:
Immigration Equality
(212) 714-2904
350 W. 31st St. Suite 505
New York, NY 10001

Freedom to Marry
(212) 851-8418
116 W. 23rd St. Suite 500
New York, NY 10011
fax (646) 375-2069
And so concludes my political rant for the day.