Now I'd like to recommend perhaps the greatest heartbreak song ever written, "Kissing a Fool" by either George Michael or the ever so scrumptious Michael Buble. Siiiigh. I heard that song whilst showering this morning and it summed up every emotion I have right now. Threw that bitch on repeat and sang my little heart out. It's amazing how cathartic certain songs can be. Just this morning I threw in a mix-CD (remember the days of mix-tapes?) Crusty made me that is all over the charts. The songs jump from the likes of Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwo'ole (say that 3 times fast!) singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" to The Oakridge Boys "Fancy Free." And that's just the tip of the iceberg because it also has Guster, R. Kelly, Anthony Hamilton and Jack Johnson. The list goes on and on. There's no rhyme or reason to it at all but this morning it made me feel so good it brought tears to my eyes.
What song moves you to tears or makes it impossible to resist the sing along or rump shakin'?
I can't resist Dolly Parton's "9 to 5."
On another note, I've decided a self-imposed exile (no, not that Exile) is just what the doctor ordered. I did not call Punchy last night as I have nearly daily for as long as I can remember.When QB called I missed it but when I returned his call I told him I couldn't see him because of laundry and homework (that was true) so that's another bird killed with the single stone. To say I've been feeling under appreciated of late is an understatement so the best I can do now is take care of me until those dummies start realizing what they're missing. And before I start coming off like I'm flawless, I do realize my shit stinks. Just not as bad. Hehe.
April 19 - May 19
It is time to put away the sentimental feelings for the day and move to something new, dear Taurus. Stop pulling out old photo albums and crying about past experiences. You will only succeed in sinking into a puddle of tears that you cannot pull yourself out of. Instead, this is a day to look to the future and plan for new experiences that you can enjoy with the people you love.
My love life, and I use that term very loosely, has a revolving cast of characters that I'm really considering canning all together. The worst thing about it is that they seem to all pop up at once and then disappear just as quickly. My "goldfish syndrome" has been mentioned here before but I basically am a forgiver and a forgetter and am all about second, third, hell even seventieth chances. Does that make me a doormat? Perhaps. Or it could just mean that I'm up there on Jesus status when it comes to turning the other cheek. More than likely, it's the former.
Anywho, this weekend was all about QB and another ex who shall for the time being be known as Punchy. Not like with a fist but, like, punch drunk. QB fell off the face of the earth and has been slowly trying to get back into my good graces. Punchy, also an ex, has always been around but we've remained the best of friends with benefits only on occasion. Now they're both trying to be with me at the same time, completely unaware of the other for the most part, and I'm stuck trying to figure out what I want. So I thought a good practice would be to list the qualities of my ideal mate here:
- Baseball and/or hockey fan - preferably both
- Social drinker but not a functioning alcoholic
- We should take care of each other - not me of him or him of me but mutual
- Educated - not necessarily degree-wise but worldly, an avid reader...
- Lover of movies
- A cook to balance off my baking/appetizer skills
- A gentleman that opens doors and walks on the curbside
- Loves to travel
- Food and wine connoisseur - or at least an adventurous and not finicky eater
- Musically diverse
- Takes care of himself physically - not muscle bound per se but do you go to the doctor/dentist regularly? Are you able to go on a hike or the gym and survive?
Is that so much to ask?
Last night's class also looks to be quite promising. The fact that my professor's name is Dr. Luda Popenhagen alone makes it worthwhile. And as my Monday prof cherished the word "certainly," the good doctor loves the way "exciting" rolls off her own tongue. Every other word. Watch for flying notebooks. This class is English/Theater so we get to do all kinds of fun exercises, read all sorts of "exciting" plays and at the end of the semester will be putting on a performance. How I wish it was a ticketed event so that you could all come and see my thespian chops in action. THESPIAN. Not lesbian. That is another story for another day. There's a boy named Randy in my class so that kind of sucks. I feel that this class ain't big enough for the both of us leading me to believe a duel of some sort is inevitable. Although maybe I'll cut him some slack because apparently he played baseball with my brother in little league and my dad was his coach. HOW CUTE IS THAT?! I know. Darling.
And, in closing, Vehicular is in the shop so your thoughts and prayers are appreciated at this time. Her check engine light came on when I was coming home from the LBC on Sunday and has yet to turn itself off so she's being diagnosed. The last thing I need is to be stranded in the dark on the way home from school so I'm erring on the side of caution and making sure she's ship shape before we shove off again. Lord knows rapists and murderers love the dark farm roads of Oxnard and Camarillo. Why wouldn't they?
***Update*** Vehicular is back safely in the arms of her owner. Turns out there was a problem with the "thermostat." I have a "don't ask, don't tell" policy with VW so I don't even know what that means but the warranty covered it. Free is good. And apparently so is my warranty because Vehicular has 42,000+ miles on her and is 3 yrs. and 3 mos. old. Your thoughts and prayers worked! Damn. Too bad I wasted 'em on Vehicular and not on cancer cures, huh? Suuuucks.
So school was great. My chemistry class is on Mondays and Wednesdays for 75 minutes. This professor has the right idea. Apparently he works full time for Amgen so this whole teaching gig is really just for shits and giggles. He pretty much told us he doesn't take attendance because he doesn't really care if we go or not. He also said he doesn't care if we pass or fail because teaching isn't his day job and if the administration wants to get mad at him for us failing so be it. So refreshing. Finally a professor that "gets it" that we're grown-ass people and at this stage in our life education is a choice we make and we don't need professors as babysitters or classrooms as our nurseries. Amen. However, he really seems passionate about his subject matter so this ought to be a very interesting class. He threw the word "certainly" around so many times I nearly struck him with my notebook but that is an obstacle I'm certain we can overcome. Certainly.
Throughout your day today, you may get the feeling that something has changed in the way people relate to each other, dear Taurus. It will be as if people were more sure of themselves, more open and expressive. And where exactly do you fit in to all of this? Are you in a mood to charm other people, just for fun? This period is perfect for taking care of your outward appearance and for getting in shape. Just do it!
Oh, MSN horoscope. Sometimes you're so dead on that it pains me. Sure, everyone has holiday weight gain but this morning I was near tears when I was trying on pants that I can no longer pass off as my size. My shirts are ill fitting and while I know my rack is impressive I have a feeling that the added "back fat" (really trying not to use the "f" word here but what else is it called?) probably wasn't helping to keep the buttons on my blouse from appearing like they were about to pop. There was also some self-belittling going on in the mirror but that's another story for another day. Am I saying I'm not pretty? No. I think I'm doing just fine in that category. Thanks to my amazing hairdresser I have a killer coif and I consider myself a skilled makeup artist so that base is also covered. However? As I dressed this morning, I wondered what was all that hard work at the gym with Perry the Gorgeous and all of the shameful morning weigh-ins at Weight Watchers for in early '06 if I was just going to turn around and put most of it back anyway? Muscle tone? A thing of the past. Sigh. I knew I was going back to the gym on Monday, starting the 5 a.m. regime once again but now it looms on the horizon a wee bit too close for comfort. I need boot camp. Or a gag.
Naturally most of these feelings of inadequacy are large and in charge because I have what some may consider a "date" this evening with someone I've never met face to face and I always get that "what if" tinge. What if my pictures are misleading? What if the remnants of my cold sore make him boot in his nachos? What if I have a "bat in the cave" the whole time we're talking and don't find out until I'm in the car on the ride home? AAAAAAARGH. Lucky for me, he seems hilarious and down to earth and incredibly smart and "above" all that superficial shit or I might really throw myself into some kind of tizzy.
But wait. There's more coming from the rambling mouth of Randi! I'm grateful that last week's HNT was cancelled because I've decided that I don't need it in '07. Sure, everyone's great and the self esteem boost from all the comments is a warm fuzzy but I just don't need the pressure. Or the whole process of picking out the one self-portrait totally lacking in body dimples or rolls. I've got a heavy school schedule that requires all of my focus and I'd rather spend my time taking pictures of others or beautiful scenery than myself. That's all. I'm just moving on. Thanks for a stellar ride. It's been real. It's been fun. It's been real fun.
On a side note, how is it that when you treat a man poorly he won't get off your jock but if you treat him like a king he kicks you to the curb? I just ask because I have had little to no contact with quasi-beau since the drunken Christmas party episode and who sends me a text message this morning to see if I'm back from London? You got it. QB. I wrote back: Got back on the 9th. Think he'll take the hint that I've been back over a week and have yet to call him? Nah. He'll probably end up buying me a diamond ring. Dumbass.
Yesterday I told you my tiny apartment had to be bombed for two tiny bugs I found, right? Well I'm not sure how many bombs you use per square footage generally but I'm pretty sure the three they used in my tiny one-bedroom loft was at least one too many. When I opened the door I was greeted by a visible fog of death inducing spray. Yummy. Needless to say, last night after work I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom, every nook and cranny. That's not exactly something I'm prone to doing after an 8-hour work day but I was quite pleased with the results. Now I just wonder if all of the dishes in my cupboard are coated in a light frosting of deadly poison... Only time will tell. If my posts suddenly cease, I guess you'll know the answer. What I was going to say, though, is that cleaning my house gave me a burst of energy and I actually feel much better today. Coincidence? Could my cold have just run its course after 3 days? Perhaps. But cleaning may just be therapeutic. I shudder at the thought.
Also? I think that Nyquil and Dayquil Sinus are quite possibly gifts from God. That is all. Geez... you would think I blogged on commission...
To quote Ben Stiller in Starsky & Hutch: No, seriously, come on, do it. Do it.
A boy called Doug eagerly fastens girdles. He is just killing ladies, men, ninjas... Oh please question Randi seductively to understand visions while x-raying your zebras.
Go ahead, you give it a try!
I took my photo down but would just like to make a comment. While a person's death is clearly a sad occasion we must never forget that their memory is a blessing and we should remember to celebrate their life well-lived. In that vein, I still wish all the regulars a Happy HNT. Another reminder to seize the day.
I just wanted to wish you all a happy 2007 and bid you adieu until at least Tuesday the 10th. London Bridge and Big Ben are awaiting my arrival as I type this. As for resolutions, I could go on and on and list every little thing about me that I want to improve in the new year but how boring would that be to read through? I just want to be a better person. Whatever that entails, I shall attempt but that's really the goal. A better me in '07. I'll keep you posted on how that goes. May all of your resolutions be stress-free and may this year be a great one for all of you.